CH 5.14

At last, our lips parted, but he did not distance himself from me. A desire that could not be hidden rose fiercely in his blue-grey eyes watching me.

As if I would disappear as soon as he let go, Lacius acted desperately but I couldn’t bring myself to answer his call. This is dangerous. Really dangerous.

“I want to hold you*.” 

*(In Korean, that expression may also mean; 1) He wants to be your lover. 2) He wants to sleep with you. Lacius meant the latter, I believe.)

Confession mingled with hot breath rang in my ears. It must have taken him a lot of courage to say that. It should be foul to ask for permission with that face and captivating voice because now I want to wrap my arms around his neck and continue the broken kiss without thinking about anything else. 

“We should… stop here.”

I forcibly squeezed out a voice that didn’t come out well and pushed his chest away. Lacius backed away more obediently than I thought.

“Shay.”

“Tomorrow… Talk.”

I may have said it coldly, but thinking about my tone only made my head hurt. Holding on to my trembling heart, I entered the room and quickly closed the door.

‘Crazy— This is crazy!’

As soon as I covered my mouth and leaned my back against the door, my legs gave out. I sat down and stared blankly into space.

Crazy. Absolutely crazy.

‘Although I indirectly revealed that I have feelings for him…’

There’s a difference between showing it and kissing him!

My heart is tickling. 

It feels like flowers are blooming in my heart. Soon, soft flowers filled it and it felt like it was about to explode. I felt like sneezing, but I forced myself to swallow it.

I’m afraid that if I sneeze, the whole room will be filled with flower petals. I was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to hide my feelings any longer if that happens.

“Ah, what should I do…”

Is it already too late? I buried my face in my knees. Pounding. The heartbeat felt in my chest spreads pleasantly to my fingertips. One door and two hearts. I didn’t hear him leave.

On the contrary,  I could feel the sound of Lacius leaning his back against the door.

With a thin wooden door between us, he and I felt the same beating of our hearts for a long time. For me, it was as if a comet fell in a parabolic arc from the black sky. 

* * *

Outside the door that Shay closed. She had no idea, but Lacius was almost at his limit.

‘There’s something… in the wine.’

Since this had happened to him many times, Lacius was quick to notice. But now he was fully resistant to most of the aphrodisiacs, stimulants, or love potions.

In particular, since he was not an ordinary person but a descendant of the God of the Sun he was not affected by most poisons.

“Ugh.”

But this was different. His heart swelled and thumped like it was about to explode.

His whole body was in so much pain that he barely endured it in front of Shay. The blood rushed especially to his lower body, and it feels like his stomach is going to turn upside down.

Lacius clenched his fists to the extent that veins popped out on the back of his hands and let out a deep breath.

His vision was blurred as if the blood vessels in his eyes had burst. The God of the Sun’s blood began to rage against the foreign substance that was trying to subdue his body. Lacius gritted his teeth and endured. So that she, who’s inside the door, would not be scared in the slightest. 

There was only one thing that came to his mind. It was Shay’s bright smile.

* * *

A week after the engagement ceremony, ‘Terran Hours’ made headlines about Evershal. Without seeing it himself and only saying a sentence or two, Mr. Bloomberg created a pretty spectacular report.

“… Thus, it is an undeniable fact that an emerging businessman appeared in Terran. Evershal is an imperial estate in the centre of the Schweiden family’s estate, and Lady Oberon is believed to have heard information about Evershal from Mr. B… blah-blah.”

Mr. B was referring to Bloomberg himself. However, only giving an alias like that could arouse more curiosity among the public.

Pressing on an unpleasant feeling with the heel of my shoe, I flipped the newspaper to see its back page. On it was written about my engagement, a subject that had been around for a week that it felt like it was no longer mine. 

“Ha, really. I don’t know why they’re so interested in someone else’s engagement?”

“Uhmm…”

“Don’t you think so, too?”

“Heuk!”

“Stop, don’t move. It’s already annoying.”

I let out a deep sigh and trampled the back of the man beneath me.

It was a little out of anger. In fact, the assassin who climbed through my bedroom window in the middle of the night did nothing wrong. The assassin is also a labourer and needs to earn a living.

However, coming when I was just about to fall asleep, was very rude of him. And that’s why he’s being punished right now.

I folded the newspaper and tossed it while pressing the assassin’s strong back with my feet. In the meantime, I saw Cat approaching with something red in its mouth. Cat, who had dealt with seven at once, started grooming with his tongue, while I was catching the last one.

“Now, shall we hear which lady sent you?”

“Keug, I-I don’t know—!”

“Oh my God, did eight people come to kill a weak lady like me without knowing why? Since when did the world get this harsh?”

After the engagement ceremony, I devoted myself to painting like a madman to hide my complicated thoughts.

As a result, my arms were numb every single day. Having a hard time painting today, I decided to sleep, but how would I sleep if they suddenly visit me like this?

I tap-danced on top of the assassin’s back, with very expert-like footwork. 

“Ugh!”

“Who.”

“Ugh!”

“Asked you to.”

“Ack!”

“Interrupt my sleep.”

Haaaa.

After that, I calmed down a bit. Having come to my senses enough to have a conversation, I sat down on top of the assassin, wiping the sweat from my forehead.

“Phew, Mr. Assassin. Do you also have a family?”

“… I-I don’t.”

“Is that so? Then, you at least have been in a relationship, right?”

“… Why are— ugh!”

“Just answer the question nicely. If you want to go back alive, that is.”

I flicked the fountain pen in my hand and sighed.

“I have a problem. There’s this guy that everyone thinks is nice so I kind of like him too.”

“… And?”

“But he can’t be my man. I mean, we’re not fated that way. So what should I do?”

“Then give up— Ugh!”

The answer is fixed, you just have to give me that answer.

My eyes were cold as I slapped the back of the assassin’s head. Having his nose against the floor, the assassin, whose nose bone had been shattered because of my slap, screamed in agony.

Anyway, I put my elbow on my knee and let out a big sigh.

I don’t want to give up, but I can’t be with him either.

That was the biggest dilemma.

“Shay, I heard a loud noise.”

“Oh, it’s nothing!”

At that time, Lacius’ low voice was heard from outside the door.