383 Saving friendships (4)
Alessandra had many things which angered her today from her father creating letters in her name to Rose pestering her about her duties as Edgar’s wife and now learning of Grant’s evil deeds. She needed a break when it came to bad news.
Things between her and Edgar were going so well, especially after how they spent his birthday. She would never tell him but she would like for them to magically go back to yesterday when it was just the two of them at home and they were tangled up in each other’s arms.
“I do have a few things I want to let go of,” Alessandra replied, going to pick up her own canvas to destroy. “I am tired of people meddling in my life. I always try to be respectful,” she said, hitting the canvas against the floor. “I don’t want to upset the relatives Edgar is close to because I don’t want their relationship to be ruined. I know what it is like to be alone without family and it is not something I want for Edgar.”
“I want us to have a loving family and it won’t just be us but people will not shut up with the opinions they think I must follow,” Alessandra’s tone changed from calm to angry and the canvas collided with the floor with a greater force. “Out of all the people who make you feel small, why must it be family? My father and then my absent mother. I’m sorry,” Alessandra apologized as she looked at the broken canvas.
“Are you apologizing to us or to the canvas you murdered?” Eleanor chuckled. She was happy to be in the presence of these women with status and see this side of them.
“To both of you,” she threw the wood that was left onto the floor. “I feel like I am getting angrier instead of letting go. I need another one.”
“How did the both of you get it to break but I did not?” Hazel asked, looking at the partially intact canvas in her hands. “Am I not angry? I mean, I do feel like all I want to do is cry. I’m surprised I was able to walk here with all of you with how tired I am both physically and mentally. Some days I just feel like I would just go to the balcony of my room and jump from it so I can finally rest.”
“Hazel,” Linda took a step forward but she stopped herself.
“I don’t because I think of my husband and my family. I don’t see why anyone is so vicious to have the seat of the queen or be the mother of the next king. You get told you have to share your husband and besides Tobias, no one there really cares about the pain I have endured trying to get pregnant. The awful medicines I took and the painful inspections on my body when all along there was nothing wrong with me,” Hazel softly spoke.
.....
“I won’t get an apology from everyone who added pressure for me to have an heir. They will push for me to be inspected more and have a child or think that my body is a waste and bring in mistresses. I’m tired more than I am angry,” Hazel touched her forehead. “I really wanted this to work but it didn’t. I’m sorry Alessandra. Your day to celebrate Edgar’s birthday is ruined because of my problems.”
“Tobias will get rid of everyone who had a part in trying to hurt you-”
“Are you aware that means your grandfather will die?” Hazel asked, looking at Linda who appeared conflicted. “I am not just upset with what he was doing to me but what this will do to you. You have always loved your grandfather. If you pick me, you lose him and if you pick him, you lose me. You don’t want to become roped into the palace but there are many people who will think you are better for Tobias. They did in the past. You were at the top of the list.”
“And yet in a turn of events from our group, Tobias picked you,” Linda reminded Hazel. There was no one but you who Tobias loved. I have never dreamed of sharing a man with anyone else and I certainly would not want to share the man my best friend loves. I stand for what is right and that is not my grandfather’s side. I can still love him but not stand for his actions. He knew where his actions could lead him so he has accepted his death and so have I.”
“I can’t turn back time to question what my grandfather was doing and stop all of this before it got out of hand. I don’t know what to do to make you trust me or be sure that I don’t want any parts of the palace. If us getting compared to each other is too much for you, I will leave town. When Tobias and Edgar reveal everything and my innocence is proven, I will leave town. I won’t come back so no one has to think of me becoming the king’s mistress. If that can bring some comfort to your mind, I will do it,” said Linda.
“Your family isn’t going to move because of this. Your brothers and father are still respected and if they did not know about what Grant was doing to me, they would be fine,” Hazel replied.
Linda smiled as she didn’t plan to leave with her family. “They will stay but I will go. It would be better if I could get married to someone out of town quickly so the discussion about who I will marry would come to an end. I can’t become a woman of the king if I am married. There were a few proposals I can accept or spend the next season with my aunt-”
Hazel could not believe that Linda, who had her eyes set on Edgar only and did not think of marriage to anyone else, would consider getting married to prove she did not want to be chosen as one of the women to become the mother of the next king. “That is not necessary. I would never want you away from your family,” said Hazel.
“It is what I want to do so you do not think of me as your enemy. I am long overdue to get married anyway. I have been pestered about my age and- Hazel?” Linda was startled by Hazel coming toward her and though she wanted to be near her friend, Hazel suddenly embracing her left her speechless.
“I am sorry for doubting you and feeling like we were competing with each other. It was just all in my head and I feel like a fool for letting everyone’s opinions make me second-guess our friendship. I really need you by my side right now,” Hazel confessed with teary eyes as she hugged Linda.
It hurt that this involved Linda’s relative because the first person she wanted to reach out to in Tobias’s absence was Linda.
“I’m so sorry about all of this. I will do what I can to make sure everyone working with my grandfather is exposed,” Linda made a promise to Hazel and to herself.