Chapter 65: Forgiveness

Chapter 65: Forgiveness

Nostalgic.

Neave had the first thought for an entire day. Exactly how he knew a day had passed was simple. This time, he did have a literal hourglass to check, and the last grain of sand had just rolled into the bottom chamber.

Ever since he left the loop, he hadn’t even once grown so dissociated—until now.

Neave decided to let his mind clear for precisely a day. Under the influence of his enhanced cognitive abilities and spirit power working full throttle, the last day felt like months. Months he needed to cool off and just not think about it.

Could he have used the mysterious realm for this purpose? No. Absolutely not. Neave was still highly hesitant about going back in there. Avoiding it forever wasn’t an option, though. Eventually, he would have to go to sleep, or he risked dying from a lack thereof. He still wanted to postpone his visit as long as he could.

Why?

It was simple. One of the thoughts he was fully confident had come from the mind manipulation had urged Neave to go to the underground chamber. There was never an instance where he was being coerced explicitly into going into the realm itself, though, which was the only reason he was even considering returning in the first place.

At least, not any instance he could clearly identify as not being his own thoughts.

He had lost confidence in telling his thoughts apart from the manipulation, but the rest day helped.

He definitely wouldn’t have any more... ÞÞÞÞÞÞÞÞ

...

Neave grinned.

“Nice try.” He clapped a few times. Although the appearance of the manipulation should have ruined his mood, Neave felt the opposite. It tried manipulating him, yet he discovered it and stopped it on time. However slight, Neave felt he had regained at least some agency over his mind.

Now it was time for Neave to properly consider the way he thought. There was a lot of work ahead of him, separating his genuine opinions from what he developed under foreign influence.

It wasn’t going to be straightforward. What if there were things he potentially agreed on with whoever was trying to manipulate him? That wasn’t an impossibility. There was also the possibility of some of his genuine opinions only developing after other parts of his thoughts were manipulated. What then?

A lot of work had to be done, and he didn’t fully trust in doing it himself.

He needed somebody else to bounce his thoughts off. This had little to do with foreign influence and more with his true beliefs. How much of what he believed was valid?

Was the influence possibly more subtle than surface thoughts? What if the manipulator had given certain things he believed confirmation or his confidence about these thoughts was subtly boosted?

Neave thought about all the people he could talk to. Perhaps Marven would be the best option? Hmm, not really. He had his own issues, and Neave thought he wasn’t the most morally oriented individual in the first place.

What about Dukean? It was probably the best choice, but it wasn’t viable yet. He had agreed to meet with Dukean in a week. It had already been a few days, but still, a few left.

Then... Gabrias?

No.

Harel?

Hmmmm.

That wasn’t a bad idea. She was inexperienced and naive, but perhaps that was precisely what Neave needed now.

Neave wormed his way out and walked into their new sect premises. It was a pretty massive building, so navigating inside it wasn’t an easy task.

Before he managed to find Harel, he noticed something else.

He felt Hunter in his spirit senses. But something was wrong. Neave took a slight detour and appeared next to Hunter.

Neave was shocked. Was he ill? Hunter was bedridden and looked terrible, but no matter what Neave probed, nothing about his body or spirit was unusual.

Which only left one thing.

Neave sighed.

Then he slapped hunter. He hit him again, pulled his nose, and rhythmically smacked his head, singing along.

Nothing worked, and Hunter remained in his delirious mumbling state no matter what Neave tried. Neave suddenly got a very peculiar idea.

Before he decided to do it, he first spent a good while making sure that it was his own idea and not something that was forced into his brain.

After a few minutes of probing, he felt confident that it was indeed something he had thought of himself.

But will it work?

There was only one way to find out. Hopefully, it wouldn’t result in anyone’s spirit being shattered.

Neave sent out a tendril and slowly wrapped it around Hunter’s spirit. Then he spent a good while fully enveloping his own spirit under the same barrier.

He poked around in his brain a bit and knocked himself out.

***

M–Mother... Why?

Hunter just couldn’t face it. He wondered if it would truly matter to him as much if he had realized this back when he was still in the sect.

Now it was different.

He had experienced the cruel reality of being on the other side of mistreatment, and what he experienced wasn’t even that bad. Compared to the dismissal and moderate bullying he had experienced, what Zearthorn elders did on the regular was far worse.

To think that every person he respected as a child was nothing but vile scum worthy of death. This was unthinkable. It was unbearable. He couldn’t shake the image of his mother slaughtering children or cackling as she ordered someone be poisoned.

Her actions gradually grew worse and worse in his mind. Where did it stop? At what point would she not do something for her benefit?

“Fucking shit Hunter, way to kill the vibe.”

“... Huh?”

Neave stared at Hunter with a deadpan look on his face.

“Huh? Huh? Huh? This is you right now; Huh? Huh? Are you stupid? Maybe you’ve been sleeping too long. Need help waking up?”

“No, I just...”

“I get it, relax. I’m just angry your stupidity ruined my dramatic scene. Just sit down or something.”

Hunter sat down without thinking and stared at Neave anxiously. He still had no idea what was happening.

Neave explained precisely what was happening in as simple terms as he could. He explained the demon book, what it did, how this realm appeared, and how Neave managed to drag him into it.

Explaining it wasn’t easy since Hunter simply couldn’t understand even relatively basic stuff. Neave was stumped at the fact that Hunter couldn’t comprehend the idea of a time loop.

Time passed, and then it did the same thing again from the start. What was so complicated about that?

Neave grabbed his head in frustration. It probably took over an hour until Hunter vaguely understood what was happening. Even then, Neave was sure he just nodded to pretend he wasn’t dumber than a rock.

Hunter was upset at what Neave had told him, even if he didn’t fully comprehend it.

What shocked Neave the most was that Hunter’s thoughts seemed to be in an entirely different place.

“Neave... I... What did my mother say? Before she died, that is.”

Neave paused for a second.

“Nothing special. She tried arguing that what she did to me wasn’t so bad, but even that was likely just to stall for time.”

“... I see.”

Neave omitted the part where he deceived her into thinking he killed Hunter. That might as well remain a secret.

Hunter had a peculiar look in his eye. It was the same half-frown Marven had on his face all the time nowadays. Neave rolled his eyes.

“Oh, just fuck off, Hunter. You’re not going to be like Marven now, all depressing and shit? Look, my mother wasn’t that much better either. Although she didn’t go after the innocent, she did take things way too far against those she considered opponents. She’s dead too, you know, so like... It isn’t necessarily the end of the world.”

That didn’t make Hunter feel any better at all. Mainly because his mother actually liked Brivia.

A question was devouring Hunter from the inside, and he just had to ask.

“Why did you lie to me back then? Did you disguise yourself to...” He didn’t know precisely what Neave wanted. He was sure Neave could have killed him countless times already, so what did he want then?

“I did it because I knew you’d get all pissy and shit if you saw me.”

“That’s... That’s it?”

“Believe it or not, I don’t harbor any resentment toward you. In my eyes, you are nothing more than a victim of sleazy bastards grooming you to be just like them. If you were an adult, it would be a different story. But you’re still a kid. Plenty of time to change your mind and become a better person.”

Neave felt delighted with what he said. That felt like something he, even before entering the loop, would say. It was a morally right opinion that even Dukean would likely agree with.

“I see... It makes sense. But there is one thing I have to apologize for.”

“If you’re going to be all ‘ooh, sorry for bullying you,’ then spare the effort, please. I already got my revenge for that.”

“No, that’s not it. But after the sect had been destroyed, I rummaged through the debris and found the tome's cover. Then I took that tome to a sect intending to have you persecuted.”

ÞÞÞÞÞ

Neave wanted to... ÞÞÞÞÞ

Hunter dese... ÞÞÞ

It was tim... ÞÞÞÞ

ÞÞÞÞÞÞ ÞÞÞÞÞÞ ÞÞÞÞÞÞ

Neave stared at Hunter, desperately holding back the influx of foreign thoughts. But some he felt were entirely his own.

This was way worse than a bit of bullying. What Hunter did was likely the direct cause of the people that chased him down.

The people that died at Neave’s hands had likely been there because of Hunter.

Neave broke out in a sweat and groaned. He grabbed his aching head as he fought the constant push to act. It was hard to even separate his own thoughts from the foreign influence.

Because this time, even he wanted to kill him.

There was only one reason Neave resisted the urge to tear Hunter apart, first here and then in the real world.

It was pretty simple, really.

If one agreed with the spooky mind manipulation that coerced them into mindless slaughter, one should probably reconsider their beliefs.

Hunter noticed Neave’s strange behavior and slowly got up to run, but out of nowhere, everything went black.

Hunter woke up sweaty and panting, looking around the room in fright.

Neave was nowhere to be found.