Chapter 25: A Good Heart
On the way there, the two continued to talk.
"By the way senior, what's your name?"
"Di-" Di Tou sweated, he instinctively was going to say Di Tou but managed to stop himself, luckily, he and Mu Di Bai had a similar sounding character in their names. "Di Bai, as in a clean earth, surname Mu."
"Ah, senior Mu, it's strange seeing such a kind person around here, most people are more concerned with themselves." Fu Hao Xin looked a little downcast, "Honestly, I feel a little bad about myself when I think about it. When I first came here I was assured in wanting to be a righteous swordsman, helping the weak."
Fu Hao Xin paused for a bit.
"That's how I first offended Qi Shan, I tried helping one of my friends Hei Gou who was getting cornered, who knew he was such an ungrateful person... He ran away and turned his back on me, later when Qi Shan and his cronies started bullying me he even joined in after a while."
"Ah..." Di Tou felt a little lost for words, as much as he wanted to console the young man telling him everything would be okay, he himself didn't have that much life experience to draw from, ah?
Di Tou felt a little conflicted in his heart, he had gotten drawn up in Xiao Fu's story and had impulsively decided to go and confront the teacher according to the way things worked in his old world where at most you'd get snubbed, but in this Academy... Things would be okay right? After all it was a teacher, surely, they wouldn't go so far as to attack a student and an old man, right?
Fu Hao Xin continued as Di Tou was getting lost in his thoughts, "That was probably the lowest point in my life. All of the friends I had made left me one by one as they couldn't handle the pressure anymore, and that disgusting fellow Hei Gou ended up on Qi Shan's good side."
Fu Hao Xin took a deep breath, "At that moment, I wondered if there was such a thing as righteousness in the world. After all what I had done was right, right?"
Fu Hao Xin's face scrunched up, and his breathing sped up considerably, "SO WHY DID I SUFFER FOR IT? WHY? Why did that despicable Qi Shan get away scott free? Is there really no righteousness? Is power the only thing that matters?"
"Ah Xiao Fu, sometimes the world can be a very difficult place."
Fu Hao Xin continued, ignoring Di Tou, "Those days I was desperate to get stronger, I trained every day, brutalizing my body, but I couldn't catch up fast enough. Against those scoundrels who have eaten medicine since the day they were born, it wasn't fast enough. Even if I beat one, they simply sent two people the next time and the cycle continued..."
"..."
"For the first time, I resented my parents for not giving me a good enough environment. For not being able to give me the resources to prosper. Why was it fair that those scoundrels had everything, while I had nothing? Was I worse then them in any way?"
"Xiao Fu..."
"I think it was then I lost my Xin (heart), I didn't know what to do, all I could think about was how things were unfair. I stopped caring, I just went through the motions. I didn't even try as hard to cultivate anymore, what was the point. Even if I train for 50 years, I know my standard. I can be considered a prodigy, but compared to those geniuses raised by the sects. I can't do anything. Even against a second-rate sect like the Qi Shan monastery, I would never be able to contend with them. So, what was the point?"
Di Tou was speechless. What could he say? At the end of the day he was just a passerby in Fu Hao Xin's life. As much as he wanted to help, he really couldn't do that much.
"So that's why I wanted to thank you senior.
"Ah, me?"
"Senior, earlier, while it's true I wasn't going to kill myself, I... I'm ashamed to say I've thought of it before. When you came before me, I was mad. Really really mad. I couldn't help but feel aggrieved, it was bad enough that I was getting harassed by people in my class, but now a random old man found it okay to come and push me out of the blue?"
Di Tou in his head: *kowtowing* I'm sorry bro, I was just trying to help! n/.0VeLbIn
"But when I realized what you were doing, I couldn't help but feel so laughable. Who am I that I fell to the level of shifting my frustrations to a passerby? When had I lost my Hao Xin (good heart)? My parents in the underworld would be ashamed if they could see me right now."
"Ah, don't say that, Xiao Fu you can't look down on yourself so much, your parents would be proud to see how resilient you are."
Xiao Fu stopped waking for a second, surprised. "Thank you senior."
Pausing for a moment he continued pensively, "Senior, we're almost there, to be honest I still don't really think this will end well, but I'm resolved to give it a shot." Hesitating he added, "If things go poorly, you should just leave senior, I don't want to get you wrapped up in my troubles."
"Haha, thank you for your consideration Xiao Fu, don't worry, I'll be outside the door, I'll come to back you up if you need any help. The teacher is there to help, surely things will be fine."
If Di Tou had been helping Fu Hao Xin with 50% of his heart earlier, wanting to do a good deed and stop a meaningless death, after hearing his story Di Tou was helping with 150% of his heart now.
Such a good youth being harassed to the point of depression was truly a travesty. Di Tou resolved to do as much as he could to help.