CH 33

The fiery love, that blind love, a fairy tale love… I’ve never wanted anything like that. 

Senelia wanted a relationship where both partners loved each other while living an everyday life. 

She wanted to cry. 

Deep down, she knew, if she married Yenelov, he would give her a life of happiness. 

But that was a dream that would never come true. 

Ohh, how miserable it all is. 

***

The funeral commenced. 

The mourners arrived at the Daphnen Mansion one by one and in the meantime, Senelia deliberately set routes as she went along her way that avoided any interaction with Benelucia or Yenelov. 

The Grand Duke earnestly tried to hold her in place long enough to talk to her endlessly about anything that came to mind. While Yenelov would just stare blankly at Senelia, who became an expert in ignoring the awkwardness, as he waited for her answer.

Even in their attitudes, the two men were very different. 

Senelia became even sadder.

The path she was forced to take, and the path to her happiness pointed in two different directions, so, Senelia couldn’t help but feel upset. 

It wasn’t too long before even wallowing in her sadness was something she would be deprived of. 

“Your Highness! Please…!”

Daphne’s young lady looked in the general direction of the loud voice, only to see an Imperial attendant calling out to Cliff de Helios who was riding a horse and leading the emperor’s procession through the gates of the Daphnen’s mansion.

A murmur erupted from the mourners.

“Why is His Highness the Emperor here?”

Everyone was naturally lost, each of them having the same conclusion in mind.

In the Daphnen’s small estate, the Viscount of the Daphnen had just died, the emperor came to pay his condolences. 

It was no joke to say that everyone would not be curious about new gossip.

Senelia, herself, was furious.

Her father’s funeral, which should have been a quiet memorial, would now be tinged with turmoil.

“For now, you can’t come in, wait nearby.”

If Benelucia had not closed the gates as soon as the emperor entered, preventing the rest of the procession from entering, Senelia would have had to churn in her anger as she stood on the spot for a long time.

“What are you doing, Ben?”

He dared to block the emperor’s procession, it was a serious sin, even if he was the emperor’s younger brother. So, naturally, Cliff looked very displeased.

“I am more suitable as His Highness’ escort than they are. They’ll only make things busier, so I’ll escort Your Highness.”

If the entirety of Cliff’s procession entered the Daphnen mansion, there would be an uproar and the funeral would be a mess.

Her heart thumped in unease.

Of course, the sword master, Benelucia, was better than the knights protecting Cliff. Even if it was an army, the number of knights brought by the emperor could not match up to Benelucia’s skills. 

However, there were enough people to make the funeral a fuss and a mess.

At first glance, it seemed like words for the emperor, but in the end, what he wanted to protect was the Viscount’s funeral. 

No, it is Senelia I want to protect.

“You are rude, Grand Duke Afron.”

There was no way Cliff would not know his brother’s inner thoughts, the emperor looked down at his younger brother frostily. 

“I will receive the punishment for my disrespect to Your Highness later. Now, I have come to give my condolences.”

The emperor and myself are only guests at the funeral, so we should not make a fuss any more.

There was a bitter silence there, and the surrounding people were left in a state of extreme caution.

Whether or not the emperor ruined the funeral by bringing in more people than the Viscount’s could afford, the emperor’s visit was a great honor. 

Meaning, Viscountess Daphnen had to accept it with gratitude, but Benelucia had managed to stop the mass intrusion in advance. 

Unfortunately, the nobility of the empire knew that the emperor would not let anyone stand in his way.

“You will be punished, Grand Duke Afron.”

Cliff, who had kept his mouth shut with a cool expression, said as he got off his horse.

With that said in finality, everyone let out the breath they had been holding.

It is over… For now. 

Fortunately, it was a funeral, and since the opponent was his younger brother, it seemed that the emperor would take a step back and not cause a scene. 

“Yes, Your Highness.”

Benelucia’s reply was calm.

He didn’t look back at Senelia. 

I’m worried that it would look like I was showing unnecessary condescension.

But Beneluciashould have turned to Senelia, if he did, he would have known how miserable she felt.

…You put pressure on me again, Your Highness. You reminded me of my place.

Senelia was in despair without being able to cry again.

The emperor deliberately led the procession and gave in to Benelucia in front of everyone.

Cliff dared to show Senelia that only Benelucia could stand up to him at this level.

The reason was understandable.

The emperor must have heard from an informant how Senelia’s father got into a carriage accident, that is why he warned Senelia not to hold grudges against his brother. 

Because she can’t mess with what she’d been working so hard on. 

“Are you okay?”

While the Grand Duke was preoccupied with dealing with the Emperor alone, Yenelov spoke to Senelia.

Senelia’s expression was mostly expressionless, but the Pendragon’s Young Lord seemed to notice her bad mood.

Obviously, it was the Grand Duke that stopped the emperor, but Senelia was once again shaken by the other man, Yenelov.

She didn’t want to fight, she wanted to run away.

So Senelia subconsciously spoke her thoughts. 

“Not a single thing… I’m not okay.”

It’s been years since I’ve been so honest in front of other people.

***

The trail walked by the emperor left the nobles beside it in an air that was suffocating. Senelia was able to get out of there with the help of Yenelov.

He begged the Viscountess for her understanding, saying that he had something to say to her for a moment, and Senelia was able to leave without any suspicion from her mother.

As if her daughter, who had been fine just a moment ago, suddenly felt unwell, she would surely have asked why.

“…Since I said something earlier, you haven’t asked anything.”

After bringing Senelia to the deserted garden, Yenelov did not say a word. He just stayed silent and stood by her side.

In the end, it was she who spoke first.

“I think you don’t want me to ask.”

When he asked why her condition had suddenly deteriorated last time, she could not answer, so Senelia hoped he would not ask.

Yenelov picked the right answer this time, he wasn’t arrogant, just caring.

Senelia suddenly remembered her first love. 

The man who could have been her fiancé was exactly like Yenelov.

Come to think of it, they look alike…

Senelia’s face turned white, she was afraid to think further than that while looking at Yenelov.

Resemblance is close. 

He closely resembled Senelia’s first love.

It is too similar.

She tried hard not to tremble.

Her first love could not come true even though both Senelia and her partner wanted it, so there had been no choice but to hold a long-lasting resentment in her heart and leave.

It wasn’t that I still loved my first love, but I thought that if I had married that person at that time, it would have been a peaceful life.

However, Pendragon’s Young Lord was similar to her first love, even in the tone of his voice, personality, and appearance was the same.

This… Coincidence maybe?

Senelia couldn’t believe it, she hurriedly spat out a few words.

I thought he had listened to the Pendragon family’s request to provoke Benelucia but that wasn’t the case.

“Actually, the reason why I came all the way here with Young Lord Pendragon was because I have something to tell you.”

He intended to test Senelia from the beginning.

Fortunately, Senelia’s voice, realizing that fact, was calm.

She was relieved that she had gotten used to the countless times she had pretended to be okay.

“I don’t think I can have any relationship with Young Lord Pendragon.”

It was a resolute word that left no room for words.

I was thrilled with you, swayed by you.

Senelia broke her heart herself, so that there is not even a little space left for anyone else.

“Wait a minute, Lady Daphnen. So suddenly—”

“It’s not all of a sudden. I was embarrassed to say it, but my thoughts were the same from the first time I heard of the Young Lord.”

Senelia’s calm words continued., it was the calm a person possessed when every fiber of their being struggled to survive.

“There is only one person I want.”

And these are the words you will take to the emperor.

[T/N: Damn, I honestly didn’t see that coming. ]

She had no intention of telling Cliff that she had noticed his trick, but she needed to make sure he wasn’t dreaming of her falling into his scheme.

Lost for words at Senelia’s sudden resoluteness, Yenelov opened and closed her lips meaninglessly.

In the meantime, she got up first and left.

“Then I have to greet the mourners, so I’ll leave first.”

Senelia left with an expressionless face. It was a much cleaner final goodbye.

***

Senelia went to her room, exhausted from receiving mourners from morning to evening, when she found the Grand Duke in front of the door.

She felt fatigue set in at once. 

Having to deal with him again, I was tired enough today, but this is too much.

“I’m sorry, Sally, it’s because of me.”

However, as soon as he noticed Senelia, he immediately got to the point, as if he had no intention of holding on to her for long.

“…What?”

“My brother is here. I’m here. You’re probably wondering about it. Sally, I’m sorry for disturbing your father’s funeral.”

Benelucia couldn’t meet Senelia’s eyes as if he was really, truly sorry.

He whispered out his apology, the shame evident in his voice. 

“Really— You’re probably going crazy with worry, but I’m just a hindrance to you, Sally.”

The scene of an arrogant man blaming himself was very unfamiliar.