Chapter 218 - In the Dark

Thump.

A broken, exhausted, aching heart.

Thu-Thump.

The only sound in the darkness was the faint beating of this weak and tired heart.

A distant light seemed to be the only way out of the darkness, but it was far away.

'Alexander, are you there?'

'Alexa?'

Their hands touched in the dark. She knew they were lying on the floor, just feeling each other's presence. Apart from the distant light, they could see nothing else.

She did not recognize the sensation and controlled the panic. It wasn't real; it wasn't real.

He said,

'I know what the light is. Light is the way out. Not for the return, but for the restart.'

Alexa for a moment was confused, but then she understood.

It was what happened when the soul was no longer connected to the body. Either it was death, or ... that was how the Lotus-fruit potion got.

She wasn't feeling the pull trying to bring her into the body.

Alexa groped, touching Alexander's face.

It was as real as she remembered!

He held her wrists gently.

'Is it time to leave? Has the spell finally lost all its strength? '

'I think so,' she said nothing about her sad conclusions. Alexander didn't expect Jette and his master swordsman and one of his best friends, both people he admired, would betray him. His unwillingness to continue living was too strong, and that disconnected them from reality.

But… what about her? Had Balbo killed the Second Prince?

As a Thanaion, perhaps Balbo Cerdán thought it was his duty to do so. Or maybe he had other reasons. Maybe Alexa never knew.

They hugged, but didn't cry.

There was no sense of time, but it didn't seem like more than half an hour had passed.

'I will use my Light, we must find our way back,' she uttered.

Alexa joined hands and said her prayer.

But nothing happened.

She tried and tried, increasingly frustrated and fearful, until the realization could no longer be denied.

She had lost the Light.

'Why can't you, Alexa?' her soulmate asked, touching her shoulder.

'I don't know.' Deep down, that was a big lie.

Deep down, she knew.

How many times had she avoided doing her Light Bearer service? Countless times she postponed, procrastinated, and refused to do what was necessary.

Alexa no longer deserved the gift.

She no longer had the right to use it.

Much less for a selfish purpose, after having ignored the suffering and decided who deserved it, and when.

'I can't do it anymore, Alexander. I did a lot of things wrong. I didn't look for Nerissa to help her, I didn't clean Ashgraufelsen… I haven't done anything for the castle Shades, just because I think it will be useless… I was among upirs, and even refused to let my brother-turned-into-upir have a second death. And I ... I'm not as impartial as I should be.'

Alexander mumbled under his breath, and the flame lit up in his hands after a few moments. It was small, but that allowed them to see each other.

'You really can! As in Ashgraufelsen! ' She was startled.

'Maybe it's because I'm with you,' Alexander looked at the flame in his hands in awe.

'Tell me, Alexander. What was your deal with the Black Queen? '

'Do you mean, Letitia?'

'Yes.'

'I asked her to leave my father alone. Not to disturb him while he recovers, or to try anything against him.'

'Did you look for her? Behind my back? '

'No, it's not how you think. It's not easy to avoid her, she is the current Queen of the Dead in the castle, Alexa. My mother's power countered the influence that Letitia has. Letitia was a true unscrupulous and evil necromancer. But now that my mother is no longer in the castle ... I could be on the run, as I was when I was in Romeo, but for how long? Besides, running and hiding is cowardly. I called her for a parley of sorts.'

'She hates Prince Gutard so much ... She wants to kill him anyway, how did she agree with that?'

'Because I told her I would make you open the gate. The gate she so desires to open. '

Alexa shook her head, looking into Alexander's violet eyes. 'Sorry, Zand, I don't understand. There is a part of it I don't understand. She actually spoke of a gate, and I suppose it's something of importance. Something we shouldn't be doing. Why would I do that in the first place? '

~ Why do you, out of everyone you, look only at the light, and not at the darkness, where the answers are? ~

Alexa heard the voice close to you, and stood up, with a start. The White Queen was on her feet, and when Alexander got up and took the light there, it became possible to see Gisela and her somewhat frightening visage.

'Alexa,' said Alexander, Orcaius really exists. He's under Holstein, asleep. He induced himself to sleep, as he found no solution to his own curse. Letitia dreamed of being Orcaius' most faithful servant, consort if possible, to make her delirious plans of being a Persephone with her Hades in hell true.'

'Does Letitia want to become a lich?'

'Perhaps that was her first wish, but now that her body is gone, I can only assume that her delusions have escalated as well as her madness,' said Alexander. 'But I told her something that convinced her I am completely stupid and I can be useful to her. I cried and faked in front of you so she made sure I was as useless and pitiful as she always believed.'

Alexa didn't want to repeat that she didn't understand it, so she just waited for Alexander to explain. What she understood, however, is that in recent times, Alexander's situation has put him in greater contact with Gisela. And he could clarify many things. Alexa just hoped he would share what he knew with her.

'Letitia never got what she wanted because my mother was the guardian of Orcaius' rest. But when it became impossible for my mother to continue to defend the place, her only alternative was to expose Letitia to the Prince of Holstein... exposing herself too. She thought she would get rid of Letitia and the cultists with this, but things didn't go as expected. Magnus died and my father went to find Gisela, begging her to do something.'

'And she did, didn't she? She made a pact with a lich, exchanging a baby for a magic heart! The heart of the lich itself! Who was that lich? Was his name Volos, by any chance?' Alexa questioned, exposing what she had found out so far.

~ Volos? How do you know that name? ~ The White Queen asked suspiciously.

Alexa deduced that, by the way she responded, it was not Volos.

'Someone who turned my brother upir. All in good time. If it's not him, who else?'

~ Orcaius. I can wake him up. I have permission to do that, if it's important. ~

Well, Gisela once was some kind of high priestess or lackey of the sleeping Lich. Exactly the position that Letitia wanted. And Orcaius gave her his heart...? It stuck on her throat,

'Wait. As far as I know the heart of a lich is very precious. Did you steal his heart?! He wouldn't give it to you.'

~ Keep your mouth shut about what you just assume, girl. He gave it to me ... But he did so because I told him it was the only way to end the curse. Orcaius is a Blind Soul. He cannot see the way, so he cannot leave. But if the light was inside him ... ~

'You mean ... If he devours a Light Bearer? The light of a Light Bearer? ' Alexa came to her conclusions, horrified.

~ Yes, Alexa. That's what I told him. I even traced the birth of a Light Bearer girl, which I consecrated to Orcaius ... I went so far for Magnus, the son of my rival... A child who I wept for when I saw dead. I was exchanging one child for another, the price of magic was fair ... But as my happiness grew, when I felt life inside me _ and seeing Magnus resurrected_ I thought about the child I promised Orcaius. The child that would be sacrificed at birth, a Light Bearer Girl. You. ~

Alexa put her hand on her chest, while listening to Shade's words,

~ At first I just thought it wasn't a problem, because the Light Bearer girls were all sacrificed just after blooming for the gift for the first time. I would just use the sacrifice that was already set to appease Orcaius' distress. And Holstein would finally see him descend into hell, where he should have been for a long time. Orcaius long ago had expelled all his acolytes and destroyed all his writings… There was nothing to regret… But I was sorry. ~

Alexa felt knocked out, almost numb, as if her mind wanted to preserve sanity at any cost. She didn't know what to say.

~ Then I did another spell. I linked your life to my son's. My son existed only because you exist, in first place, to be sacrificed. So I thought that one could only live if the other lived. You both have become connected by your souls and your destinies. But it's time for you to get rid of it. ~

Alexa looked at the distant point, trying to digest everything she had discovered there.

'You did a spell binding us because you had offered me to Orcaius in exchange for the heart to resurrect Magnus.' She had a minimal notion about the rules of magic, which required equal weights in what was given and what was paid. Gisela was a shrewd witch. She had left dead ends to circ.u.mvent the set price. Which made her pay with her life ... Maybe on purpose. Finally, it explained why Prince Gutard let the Church condemn his wife_ who now Alexa knew, he loved. And so he locked her up in the tower to die... When he discovered how she saved Magnus' life and what she did to Alexander and some unknown child. The crimes she committed were serious, even if they were crimes for pity.

"When you told me you needed to go back, what did you want me to do?"