CH 86

She Has Already Begun Longing for Her

As the cushions in the room were still not warm from sitting, Song Shu Qing found an excuse to go outside. She leaped onto the roof and squatted near a clearly leaky hole, deep in thought.

Letting out a sigh, just as she was about to get up, she heard a young boy’s shout from the ground.

“Hey! Sister who delivers cured meat! It’s dangerous up there!” With a furrowed brow, Xun’er called out with concern, “How did you end up there? I’ll go find a ladder for you… hey!”

As the boy turned his head, he saw Song Shu Qing gracefully jumping down from the rooftop and then speaking to him, “Do you know how many big holes there are on your roof?”

“Wu…” Nodding, Xun’er scratched his head awkwardly, “Those holes are quite big. One of them is right above me and Sister Zhao’s bed. Every time it rains, we have to use a basin to catch the water. One time, I accidentally kicked it while I was asleep and Sister Zhao got soaked.”

“Well…” Unable to resist, Song Shu Qing massaged her forehead and asked the boy while crossing her arms, “Can you find me some hammers, nails, and wooden boards? Do you have any?”

“Huh? You want to fix it!?” Xun’er’s tone was shocked, his face filled with disbelief.

“What else can we do? Just let those holes stay there? It’s not safe with the rainy season approaching, right?” Song Shu Qing shrugged, looking at the boy who barely reached her chest, wearing a dumbfounded expression.

“It’s not that… it’s just dangerous to go up there…” His voice trailed off, Xun’er scratched his head, “Brother Hong used to handle the repairs, but he hasn’t come back for a long time. Mom and Sister can’t climb up, and neither can I…”

“Is that so?”

As the mastermind behind Hong’er being stranded in Youzhou, Song Shu Qing pouted and felt a sudden obligation to fix the roof herself. “…Don’t worry, just hurry and find me some tools. I’ll go up and give it a try.”

Though hesitating a bit, Xun’er, recalling the woman’s agile movements earlier, turned and ran towards the back door. Before long, he returned with a miscellaneous assortment of tools.

Staring at the pile of items before her, Song Shu Qing had a pounding headache.

As a woman who always failed at arts and crafts in art class, even after watching Cao Yun’s skilled craftsmanship a thousand times, she still wasn’t confident in her woodworking abilities.

…Just, stick the wood… and give it a few taps…

Not difficult, right?

It shouldn’t be difficult, right?

Glancing at the boy beside her, Song Shu Qing hesitated and then sighed, “Well, there’s strength in numbers.” Grabbing Xun’er’s collar, she used her light skills to leap onto the roof.

“Wow! It’s so high.” Despite it being a single-story house, Xun’er still clung tightly to the woman beside him, fear evident in his empty hand.

Watching the boy whimper nearby, Song Shu Qing wore an expression of someone acquiring new knowledge and muttered, “So, it’s a hereditary trait for you to be afraid of heights, little Zi Yan. How adorable.”

“You, you, you, what are you saying? I didn’t hear clearly,” the boy stuttered, his face flushed with fear, yet his other hand still tightly gripped the tools.

“It’s nothing, it’s nothing,” Song Shu Qing casually dismissed the boy’s concern. She approached the largest hole on the roof, crouched down, and picked up a wooden plank, preparing to nail it in place.

“Hey, hey, hey, you can’t fix it like that.” Despite his fear, Xun’er still squinted and stole glances at the woman’s actions. Upon witnessing such rough methods, he couldn’t help but speak up, “If you do it like that, it will still leak. You need to remove the damaged part first, then cover it again.” He gestured with his hand.

With a tilt of her head, Song Shu Qing looked at the boy, impressed by his confident explanation.

“Your turn.” Suddenly, she handed him the hammer, saying, “Honestly, I have no idea how to do it. I’ll just be your assistant.”

“Huh?”

“Hurry up, or the sun will set.” Propping up her head, Song Shu Qing urged him, “Don’t you know how?”

“I think I do. Maybe…” Taking the hammer, Xun’er also crouched down, attentively examining the worn-out wooden plank.

Song Shu Qing obediently acted as his assistant, timely handing him the tools as instructed.

As they repaired the final hole, Song Shu Qing couldn’t help but ask, watching Xun’er’s skilled motions of hammering and fixing, “Hey, how come you’re so talented at such a young age?”

“Previously, an uncle from a neighboring village would teach me during his free time.” Wiping the sweat off his forehead, Xun’er proudly straightened his chest, “He even praised my talent and said I would become a great carpenter in the future.”

“Well, that’s really great. Being able to repair anything and do everything,” Song Shu Qing smiled as she looked at the boy before her.

“…But I can’t become a carpenter.” Suddenly, with slumped shoulders, Xun’er shook his head, “It’s impossible for me.”

“Oh? Why?” the woman asked, puzzled.

“Because I can only make a lot of money by studying and becoming an official.” Filled with frustration, the boy’s tone weakened even as he hammered the nail, “Even though I’m terrible at studying, unlike my sister… Unlike my sister Chao, I just go to school to have lunch. I always doze off in class and get scolded by the teachers. I’m not as serious as my sister.”

“My father is gone, and Brother Hong is not here either. I have to support the family as a man.”

Roughly wiping his dirty face with his sleeve, the boy’s tender voice carried a clarity born from the pressures of life. “And Sister Chao is about to get married. Matchmaking and dowry require money… Oh, there’s still Sister Yao. Even though she’s an old maid, maybe no one wants her, but I still have to prepare for her.”

Xun’er spoke seriously, leaving Song Shu Qing both amused and touched. The woman touched her nose, pondering for a moment in her mind, and then spoke slowly, “I don’t think being a carpenter is a bad thing.”

“Isn’t it better to do something you love and have talent for, rather than doing something you dislike and have no talent for?” She gently tapped the boy’s forehead with her finger, comforting him, “You don’t have to worry about the dowries for your two sisters either. If Sister Chao wants to get married, I’ll introduce her to a good family.”

“As for your Sister Yao…”

With a smile curling at the corners of her mouth, Song Shu Qing stood up and patted her sleeves. “I have already promised to take responsibility for her for a lifetime, so naturally, it’s up to me to take care of it.”

“As for dowries, I won’t accept any.”

After sunset, Zi Yan’s mother also returned. The mother and daughter, who hadn’t seen each other for a long time, embraced and wept for a while, while Song Shu Qing simply squatted outside with Xun’er.

The two of them remained silent, listening quietly to the faint crying from inside the house.

That evening, after having a meal together, Song Shu Qing took Taxue’s hand and prepared to return to the inn.

“For the simple meals and your company, thank you,” Zi Yan said softly, holding an oil lamp and looking at the woman wearing a hat and cloak. “And thank you for visiting my mother and younger siblings.”

Zi Yan couldn’t express in words how she felt when she saw Song Shu Qing squatting down, chatting casually with Xun’er like friends, patiently helping Chaochao with her studies, and earnestly trying to communicate with her deaf mother through gestures.

A soft, warm feeling filled her heart.

“What are you saying? Your mother cooks really well. I ended up having half an extra bowl of rice,” Song Shu Qing patted her stomach, looking relaxed. She halted, not wanting her beloved woman to walk away from her in the night breeze. “Go inside quickly. Your family must have a lot to say to you.”

Reluctant to let go of her hand, she slowly loosened her grip, and Zi Yan lowered her head. “…You, you’re also my family.”

Song Shu Qing froze for a moment, then gently kissed the back of her hand. Her eyelashes trembled, and she tilted her head. “Of course.”

Her eyes were filled with a playful smile.

“Go inside, I’ll come to pick you up tomorrow afternoon.” Releasing the warmth in her hand, the shadow guard watched the woman’s figure take a few steps back before turning around and gracefully mounting the horse.

“Quickly, go back to the house!” With a final reminder, Song Shu Qing firmly kicked the horse’s belly and galloped into the ink-like darkness of the night.

The figure of the lone rider and horse disappeared without a trace in the blink of an eye.

Staring at the direction Song Shu Qing had left, Zi Yan stood alone for a while, until the oil lamp in her hand gradually dimmed, then she turned and entered the house.

“Sister.” Speaking softly while holding a blanket, Chaochao asked the woman, “Has Miss Song left?” She carefully arranged the bed for Zi Yan, while the others had already settled down to sleep.

“Yes, she’ll come again tomorrow.” Removing the hairpin from her hair, Zi Yan joined her sister’s side to help.

As they lay down, the two sisters looked at each other, their faces illuminated by the dim glow of the oil lamp. Chaochao couldn’t help but smile with happiness.

“What’s the matter?” Zi Yan, with a composed expression, asked Chaochao in a low voice.

“It feels like… I’m dreaming.” Blinking her eyes, Chaochao sighed, “A few days ago, Hong’er took all the money from our home, saying he was going to the capital to become an official. It was already difficult for us, and it felt like adding insult to injury.”

“But then, unexpectedly, a government official approached us and offered to hire Mother as a cook, with a generous salary.” There was an unmistakable delight in her voice as Chaochao extended her hand from under the covers, gesturing.

“Even attending school seemed impossible before. Not even younger brother was guaranteed a place, let alone a woman of my age. But the teacher insisted that a powerful figure in the capital had written a recommendation letter for us, allowing us to attend school.”

“We don’t even know any influential people in the capital… It’s truly miraculous.”

“And now, Sister Yao has returned too. It all feels like a miracle.”

Zi Yan looked at Chaochao’s sparkling eyes and listened to her joyful words, tightly gripping the blanket.

She knew.

She knew how that miracle came to be.

It was that person who treated her better than anyone else but always had an understated demeanor.

In a soft voice, she echoed, “Yes… it truly is a miracle.” Zi Yan lowered her gaze, murmuring.

“It was a miracle that I obtained after giving everything, making wishes to the heavens, going through countless cycles…”

It seemed like a redemption specially sent by fate, pulling her out of the deep swamp and infusing brilliance into the darkness.

It’s not an exaggeration.

After all, that person’s presence was so wonderful.

It filled her heart and became her pain, something she couldn’t free herself from.

The night seemed to have suddenly become too long…

Because, you see,

She has already began longing for her.