120 [120]

a man's desire, a man's sin

Pride, avarice, greed, idleness.

Most of Karen's desires were not fulfilled. Obviously, Karen's stay was a splendid mansion, a beautiful landscape without a life threat, and a place where she stayed with the only person who understood her. There was a complete peace here that she had never had in 100 years.

But that was not enough.

Karen knew the ultimate pleasure. I knew the desire to be higher. The pleasure of conversation with people in society, the joy of being praised, and the exploration of the mouth, not the feed for movement.

So far, the only sin Karen has been idleness. But even that wasn't right for Karen. He lived hard for too long and tried to give up, but he even gave up. I heard him die somehow, and I heard him kill him.

He risked his life for 100 years.

The stimulus was too weak for her in this life.

It's not in the book, it's really life, it's not alone, we can do it together.

When I thought about it, a year felt too long, too long. Karen felt a little nervous. And there was another problem that gave Karen anxiety.

"…why not?"

Karen sat on the bed with a pillow. I couldn't understand.

"…why?"

Sir Raymond is his lover. In this life, she didn't celebrate, but she is her husband. There are only two things that can understand each other. There is no doubt about his affection. From the eyes, from the gesture, from each word, there was a love that was close to desperation. So Karen was even more confused.

"Why... don't you?"

Why doesn't Raymond have sex with him?

Men and women, husband and wife.

Love problems are all right.

No health problems.

Even without a single person around.

"There's only one thing to do, right?"

Karen thought it was natural. Young men and women. And Karen and Raymond had already slept together several times in the past. For himself and Raymond, physical union was not the end of a distant book.

“…….”

Karen looked to the side of the empty bed. Raymond went out early this morning, too.

Even now, we have slept together. But contrary to her expectations, Raymond never undressed Karen. We went to bed together, but literally only slept together. It was calm to sleep listening to other people's breathing, but the longer the day got, the stranger it was.

The more he thought about it, the more reason he had no relationship with him.

Proudly.

Karen bit her nails. I was irritated with nervousness.

I couldn't understand why I had to feel this emotion. Raymond shouted, "I'll take care of everything," and so did the meal. All the maintenance, cleaning, and laundry were not satisfactory. Most of all, he wasn't even around Karen. Karen had to spend all day just meeting Raymond. Even if he tried to help with his work, he stopped him because he didn't like it.

"No way..."

Karen came up with a home she didn't want to think about.

Are you sick of it?

"Maybe… is there…"?”

It was common for a couple to become estranged from each other as they grew older and stronger. It is a common story of a married couple whose physical aspirations wither even though they support each other mentally. Even if Raymond and Karen had young bodies, did their sexual excitement disappear as memories gathered?

“…….”

Do we end up living a quiet life where we hug each other when we sleep, ask how we are doing, play chess together, and talk about books? Really?

“…….”

It was an unexpected future. Even if such a future came, it was not now.

The hand holding the pillow is hard.

"I'm not satisfied."

Karen could never be satisfied with just holding hands and sleeping.

Even more so if this nervousness he felt could be resolved by a relationship.

Karen opened the closet door. I changed my clothes, but it wasn't Karen's favorite. I wanted to wear something pretty, but all I had was a simple black dress for the maids. I change clothes that look the same every day. I eat the food there.

When will the new clothes come? Karen didn't like to wait. Also, one or two new clothes could not be satisfied. When you buy clothes, you have to touch and choose hundreds of fabrics, choose what type of clothes you want to make, and choose what sewing machine you want to use.

Karen, who wore customized clothes from a seamstress even when she was the daughter of Princess Haier, had difficulty in anticipating clothes that she made without measuring herself.

Karen closed the closet door and went out looking for Raymond.

I thought it would be in the restaurant, but it wasn't there yet.

"Where did this man go?.”

Karen glanced as she passed through Raymond's study, but she wasn't in it. It was early morning. As I passed the corridor and headed for the hall with the central staircase, I heard a man moving.

It was Raymond. Karen saw him receive the light from the glass that burst from the first to fourth floors of the center. I was working hard as usual. He always worked hard on everything. Except for one.

"Sir Raymond. Good morning."

When Karen said, Raymond raised his face and looked at Karen. Then his lips drew a line.

"Are you up? Wait a moment. Breakfast is not ready yet."

"Why are you cleaning up there?"

"You come and go every day. Wouldn't it be better to be clean?"

"Do you wash it every day?"

"Yes."

Raymond was cleaning up. And it was always neat.

Karen was sorry that she couldn't confirm his condition in the morning. Raymond barely showed any disorganized appearance while living together. Except for cases like the first day, Raymond always woke up before Karen and fell asleep later than Karen.

"You don't have to work too hard. I'm fine."

"I just do what I need."

Maybe I worked so hard that my sexual desire disappeared?

Raymond took care of the castle by himself, gave food to the remaining chickens and ducks, and did all the laundry and meals. The worse Karen eventually tried to help, but Raymond didn't even want Karen to move. It's dangerous.

"I'll just take care of everything."

Is that a good thing?

"The man who works at home is the sexiest."

The maidens who lived in the past shouted in unison about their ideal type.

Most of the servants did not want to work well, and the mothers of the servants were mostly servants. For Karen, the maids complained that post-retirement women were never able to rest at home and work all day long.

So a man like Raymond who wants to do the housework himself is very considerate and attractive. He's a man I'll never see again.

"But…."

Is it attractive for a man with a fortune who can afford to hire 100 servants? Aren't you just making things up for nothing. Karen hoped that he would spend more time with himself today, leaving everything he could use as an employee rather than spending time anxious about the future he had yet to come. It was more wasteful not to spend money when there was money.

"I'll finish it soon."

I don't know if it's sexy.

Karen glared at Raymond's movements. His sleeves were rolled up and his forearms were strong. The dress was plain, but underneath it was unusual. Karen already knew how the muscles under that dress worked. Down there.

That's a big jump.

Karen licked her lips with her tongue.

"What's wrong, Karen?"

Raymond felt Karen's eyes as he was cleaning the floor and stopped. He didn't stop even when he said hello in the morning, and apparently noticed that Karen's condition was unusual.

"Why do you look so scary....”

Raymond asked Karen in a nervous voice. He sounded like he had done something wrong. Of course he did a lot of wrongs. a crime of neglecting the duty of a married couple

"Lord Raymond."

"…yes."

"Stop what you were doing and come here."

Raymond hesitated, pushed the mop aside and came to Karen. Karen saw Raymond coming up the stairs. The forearm is definitely steady, and the exposed forearm is tightly held by the muscles. Even though it was a simple costume, the body proportion and shape were perfect. I think I looked better in the military uniform. That kind of work suit was fine with him. Raymond touched Karen on the cheek with his hand as he looked up several steps.

"Are you sick? I don't think I have a fever, but my face is red."

No, I have a lot of heat.

"Sleep with me."

"You woke up late today. It may sound like nagging, but you tend to sleep too much."

Do you think he's doing that on purpose? Karen grabbed Raymond by the collar. It wasn't hard to catch because it was down a few steps. Raymond was grabbed by Karen by the collar with a puzzled look. Karen looked down at him and said,

"I can't stand it."

"…I'll try harder. The cart will come tomorrow. What I need is…."

Karen spoke again, eye-to-eye contacting Raymond.

"I'll say it again without changing the subject. Let's go to bed right now."

"…yeah?"

Raymond hardened.

Karen even had the illusion that she told you to go out and die. Because Raymond's face turned like a statue. What's that face that seems to be deaf. Raymond turned white at first, then red. Even my ears were red.

"Carran... we... I'm not married yet..”

What are you talking about? Karen glared at Raymond in a fit of spirits.

"How many times do we have to get married?”

"Oh, um, Karen, so....”

Raymond stammered without seeing Karen properly.

"Now…here… It's just the two of us."

"But."

"I know. There's your situation... Don't you think we should be too... without moderation? There's still a lot of time left... Already."

“…….”

Karen saw Raymond, who had reddened her ears, and she felt like she had become a dainty girl. Kidding, but Karen felt her whole body drained. What can you do with Raymond?

"Yes…."

"Carran?"

Karen let go of the hand that held Raymond. The pulse is gone. Yes, this time again, Karen has to put up with her greed. Like you have to endure exploration, you have to endure gambling, you have to endure adventure.

"…I see."

"Thank you for your understanding."

“…….”

Karen thought about where to hit Raymond, and soon grabbed him by the collar and kissed him. It was a kiss that expressed anger. The stiffened Raymond's jaw and unopened lips were bitten hard.

"Okay, I'll be there first. Don't be sick. It's a vent of anger."

Falling and Karen still chewed at the stiff Raymond. Raymond nodded absentmindedly. I still felt like I was out of it.

"…yes."

"…Lord Raymond."

Karen spoke back and forth to Raymond, who had held her.

"…yes."

"I got it. So I'm going first."

Karen let go of Raymond, but this time he wouldn't let go of Karen. Karen tried to let go of Raymond's irritation. Frankly speaking, I didn't want to see his face anymore because I was embarrassed for myself. However, Raymond continued to give up his excuses.

"Lord Raymond?"

Raymond looked at Karen's eyes and breathed a few times, then grabbed Karen's face and kissed her again. It was such a rough move that what he said a little while ago was overshadowed. Frustrated by the sudden kiss, she pushed Raymond's shoulder away. It wasn't a throw to bear it, Karen was even angrier at his urgent move.

"Now… what is it?”

Karen tried to criticize the movement against her, but Karen could not say any more. Raymond's eyes were covered in dark color. His eyes were so dark that the viewer had goosebumps.

"Carran."

Raymond pulled Karen around the waist.

"Carran."

Raymond called Karen one more time.

It was not a call that needed an answer.