Volume 1 - CH 28

28th day of confinement

Translated by SoundDestiny

Edited by Kaepinned

I woke up.

I raise my body and look around the room.

‘Konata hasn’t come home yet, huh?’

There is no sign of her.

I do my business in the bathroom and wash my hands.

Even though I know it’s pointless, I open the bathroom door to check inside and peek out through the front door scope.

However, even if I try to take such a comforting action, of course the current situation will not change.

I cook some white rice.

I finish my breakfast with an egg on rice.

I put the teacups and bowls in the sink, and let the water out of the tap.

I pick up a sponge and wipe away the yolk residue.

Pikon

Electronic sounds reach my ears, mixed with the regular echoes of running water.

‘Incoming call! Is it from Konata Direct Message?’

I turn off the tap and throw out the sponge.

Wiping my hands roughly with my clothes, I open the door to my room and grab my phone as if to snatch it.

‘No. Texting……?’

I shrug at the texting app icon at the top of the phone’s screen.

However, as soon as I swipe down the icon and see the subject line displayed, I immediately straighten my back.

“『Re:Regarding the storyboard of the new work, Nikaido Hinata』”

‘……You got back to me sooner than I expected. Usually it takes three days at the earliest.’

The sender’s storyboard attached to the side of the tasteless title is that of a familiar editor.

It is the second person I’d expected to hear from.

I sit cross-legged on the floor, unlock the pattern lock on my phone and tap the subject line.

Instantly, the text of the email fills the screen.

I close my eyes, take a deep breath and open them again.

『Thank you very much for your continued support. I am Haruka Tanaka from Rare Comics. I read your storyboard. I didn’t expect you to come up with a gag manga. ……To be honest, I was surprised. As for myself, I was hoping for a romantic comedy, but, well, that’s OK. Our company’s creed is [anything goes as long as it’s funny]. Now, let me quickly conclude by saying that I think it would be very difficult to give this storyboard  to the conference as it is. The reason is that, frankly speaking, it isn’t funny. Of course, as the sense of laughter is different for each person, I thought that I should not judge it based on my own personal opinion, so I asked other editors to read it, but they had almost the same opinion. For a comic that deals with undertones, it doesn’t 『lose its shame』, does it? If it is a gag comic, I think it would be tough to handle it commercially unless it has reached a level where the shame is sublimated. In the words of another editor, it’s 『as slippery as watching a junior high school student calling out a series of newly-learnt undertones』……..In addition, recent gag mangas are less likely to be developed from the first-person perspective of a strong protagonist, and are more likely to be told from the bird’s-eye viewpoint of three or so characters, each with their own personality, which is commercially demanding in terms of contemporariness. And although I felt the passion in the main character’s formulation, perhaps in a way that Sensei does not intend, it seems that the character has become snarky and difficult to empathise with. The lyrical and emotional dialogue spun by her characters fit well with the world of battle manga and fantasy manga but I don’t think it is a good match for gag manga. I have written some pretty harsh things above but the storyboard I received at the previous meeting with Sensei had no plot at all, so compared to that time, it has improved. I understand the feeling of wanting to draw a bizarre story when you can’t get your new work through. However, I believe that the charm of Sensei’s manga lies in your honesty and dedication to pursuing delicate emotions. I myself want to see the high road, not the evil road of Sensei. So please sit back and look for your strengths again. It does not have to be a romantic comedy. I am looking forward to seeing a new storyboard that shows off your personality to the fullest. We look forward to working with you.』

[ED : I was confused about ‘undertones’, can’t find the meaning on google, so I need to ask TL lol. So I guess I will try to explain a bit about it for the readers that may be confused too. ‘Undertones’ here may be similar to self-referential jokes, a joke that is made to be not too obvious to its readers; underlying jokes. Um.. I hope this will help some of you. LOL]

I slid the phone to the floor as if to throw it away.

The second half of the text message was so tear-stained I couldn’t read it properly.

But I do know this much.

‘Hahaha, another rejection.’

A strange laugh escapes.

A rotten voice, as if concentrated with self-mockery, frustration and inadequacy.

‘Is it all my self-satisfaction? I wonder if it is. I suppose it is.’

The editor’s point is long-winded, but the gist of it is that the work I put out is 『full of pretentious descriptions, too self-indulgent and lacking in objectivity』.

That may be so.

The storyboard this time was a work I drew on the spur of the moment, with no commercial considerations.

‘Of course, I didn’t have much expectation that the storyboard would be accepted in one shot…..’

To be honest, I didn’t think it would be so badly criticised.

I thought I had created the best storyboard I could.

But if you think about it, it’s a foregone conclusion.

If my taste was right to begin with, I wouldn’t have had my storyboard dropped so many times.

‘Konata praised me but on second thought, she’s not really a professional editor or anything.’

Her opinion is only the opinion of one reader.

What’s more, she’s my fan.

Naturally, she would have been lenient in her evaluation.

It was foolish of me to take it seriously.

I should have thought about it more.

‘I’m kind of tired all over again.’

Lying down on my stomach and burying my face.

I don’t feel like doing anything.

Somewhere, a quick-witted grasshopper warbler is singing.

It’s just like me, I thought.

──Gachagachagacha.

At the worst possible moment, a sound comes from the front door.

I raise my upper body.

I wipe my face with my shirt and turn towards the doorway.

My failure is my failure.

It’s not Konata’s fault.

I am honestly happy that she is able to go back to school.

I can’t let my personal circumstances put a damper on that celebration.

“Welcome back.”

Smile and try to say it cheerfully.

“I’m back.”

Konata puts her bag down in the corridor near the front door.

“You’re late.”

“…… Sorry.”

She takes off her loafer and comes up to the room, walks up to me and bows deeply.

“No, you don’t have to apologise so much. That’s just, you know, it’s been a long time since you’ve been to school and there must be a lot going on.”

I say with a goofy smile.

My own words are devoid of emotion.

“──I couldn’t go to school.”

When she says this, Konata slumps to the floor with her eyes tightly shut.

“Eeh?”

“But I went to school. I really did. But at the school gate, a classmate who I knew spoke to me and I couldn’t reply well, so I got stuck. The chime rang and then I got really scared and ran away. I couldn’t come home yesterday because I felt so ashamed and sorry, even though you were cheering me up.”

A tearful, heartfelt confession.

“──I see, then, it’s mutual, isn’t it?”

I murmur.

It isn’t as positive as the face value of the words would guarantee.

Rather, it is a viscous slush, with dark nuances of joy.

“Eeh?”

“The storyboard, it didn’t work.”

I say matter-of-factly.

“That can’t be……. It was so interesting.”

I can’t accept her words honestly at the moment.

I am even feeling rather annoyed.

“No, it wasn’t interesting. That’s why it was rejected. I was beaten to a pulp. I’m sorry. Konata has helped me so much.”

I bow my head.

I’m sincerely pathetic.

This is what I’m capable of now.

“It’s not about me. I’m not at all…….”

Konata mutters in a muffled voice.

Learn more

Pause

Unmute

An awkward silence dominates the room.

“……What was the point?”

When the cicada’s sound died down, I blurt out.

“Eeh?”

“Konata couldn’t go to school and my storyboard was rejected…….Then I wonder if our month-long confinement meant anything.”

It’s just empty and vain.

If I had failed, but Konata had been able to attend school, there would still have been salvation.

But if we both fail like this, this encounter is pointless.

This is nothing more than a licking of wounds between two losers.

There is no productivity, no future.

“H,hey…….”

Konata reaches out to say something.

“Sorry. I just need a moment alone.”

I turn my back on her.

A moment later, her expression burns into my retinas.

Her frightened eyes, her trembling lips.

She definitely has a hurt look on her face.

But even when I find out, I can’t say a single follow-up word to her.

Right now it is all I can do to keep my negative emotions in check.

“………….”

My footsteps move away.

The sound of a door closing.

I haven’t had  dinner, I haven’t taken  a bath, I just pull the futon over me.

It is as if I am reverted to the person I was before I met her.

That’s how I felt.