Chapter 171 - Panda Eyes

"What about dad's good night kiss?"

Alicia's movements stopped for a moment.Then in a distant voice Alicia said,"He doesn't want one.And now you baby,come on,lay down fast.Ru lay on the bed immediately while looking expectantly towards his father.Alicia,who had yet to look up at Ryu,also lay next to Ru.

Ryu stood frozen at the door feeling guilty all over again.Sigh!His apology will have to wait.He only hoped that Miss Lu would be kind and forgive him.Going to the other side of the bed,Ryu pulled back the blanket and got into bed.Lying on his side with his head on his hands,Ryu started the story in his deep baritone voice.Ru was enthralled by the story and had turned on his side to face his father.Seeing this,Alicia also turned away and her back faced both the father and son.No one realized that Ryu's eyes were fixed on her shaking shoulders.

Alicia who had turned away,could no more stop her tears.She cried silently but her body was trembling.She did not listen to a word of the story that he was saying but his soothing voice,lulled her to sleep as well.She closed her eyes and fell asleep with tear tracks visible on her face and wet lashes.Ryu who had been continuously watching Alicia,knew the exact moment she surrendered herself to sleep.Confirming that both had fallen asleep,Ryu got down from the bed and pulled the blanket around both.His heart ached at seeing the dried tears on Alicia's face and knowing that he was the cause of these.Placing his hand on her cheek,he caressed her for a minute but then turned back.Going to the window,Ryu looked out at the night sky outside.He tried to think back to his memories but all he felt was a blank void.He could see that Alicia loved him dearly and was hurting seeing the indifference in his eyes.And he knew himself well and what his heart was telling him.But...

There was something that he had hidden from Neil and the others.Only the doctor knew the condition.He had forgotten not just the events and people from last year but many other random things.His memory had blank spots.He could not remember,Ru's birth,he did not remeber how his parents looked like and he had forgotten Ah Hai as well.The doctors had assured him again and again that this was only temporary because of the blood clot pressing on his membrane.Once this clot was done away with,though he may slowly regain his memories there were also chances that these blank spots would remain.The only guarantee was that he would not have more memory lapses.But he did not know what else was missing in his memory.And this worried and even scared him.

He turned back to look at Alicia,who had accepted his sickness and instead of lamenting the fates,she had decided to not give up on him.He was tempted to behave like tonight so that she would eventually hate him and leave him,potentially saving her from further heart ache.That had been his original plan anyway when he had not met her.But now he knew of her strength and love for him.He had realized that this woman of his heart would follow him to the ends of this earth.Going near the sleeping beauty,he smoothed the light frown between her gurrowed brows and then bent down to place a gentle kiss on her forehead.

Analyzing his feelings and emotions,Ryu came to the conclusion that he could not bring himself to drive Alicia away.So he may as well accept her presence and learn to care for her if not love her.He did not think he loved her in the past as well.It must have been mostly gratitude for treating his son well and maybe respect and a healthy dose of lust.Laying on the bed,Ryu tried to get into a comfortable position to sleep.He had not slept well in the past month and even now could only stare at the ceiling silently.Alicia had turned back in her sleep and was now facing them.Ryu turned to stare at Alicia and soon fell asleep with her image still in his eyes.

Though Alicia had fallen asleep,she woke up in the middle of the night because of nightmares.Sweating profusely she quickly looked around and after finally making sure that both Ryu and Ru were lying safe next to her,she fell back on the pillow and tried to sleep.But sleep soon seemed impossible.Every minute she closed her eyes,her hubby's indifferent and cold look would flash in front of them and she would shiver.No amount of distraction could work on that image,leaving Alicia to suffer a fitful sleep.Finally sleep claimed her in the early hours of the morning.

A little while after Alicia fell asleep,Ryu woke up.Seeing the dawn break on the horizon,he realized that he had slept through the night.Glancing at his family,he decoded to freshen up and go for a morning run.

Ryu's leaving broke Alicia's slumber and soon she exited the bed.Looking at the clock sitting on the side table,Alicia realized that it was time to wake up anyway.She had to go to the university and Ru to school.Rubbing her eyes,she entered the bathroom and almost gave herself a scare.Staring at her,from the mirror was her reflection.Her disheveled hair and bruised swollen eyes made her look terrible...