Volume 2 - CH 24

My name is Emma. I was going to be 11 years old soon. I worked as a maid apprentice in the Rosenberg marquis household, but I was born and raised in the slums. The life I led up until recently didn’t even allow me to eat proper meals.

Before I knew it, I, who previously had to share one loaf of bread between the whole family, was working at the secondary residence of the Rosenberg household, located in the best neighborhood of the noble district in the royal city. If you were to tell me before my arrival that such a thing would happen, I think I would have gotten angry and told you to not make up such imaginary wild tales. That was how unbelievable of a good fortune this was considered by a child who had grown up in the slums.

The compassionate Lady Sophia, who gave me and my older brother, children who were raised in the slums, her patronage, as well as the kind teacher Cyril, who put in a good word for us before Lady Sophia. Thanks to these two people, the two of us were able to eat delicious meals every day. I was desperately trying to do my best to repay them, however-

At that time, in the training room of the secondary residence of the Rosenberg household, located in the royal city:

“Emma, refined behavior is nothing but the repetition of self-assured motions that extend throughout your nervous system all the way to your fingertips. Move with more confidence.”

“Alright, Rouché.1”

Rouché’s advice startled me and I shrunk in on myself. While Rouché, who had taken on the role of our tutor, was kind, the moment our etiquette studies began, she became very strict.

My older brother and I were low-class children, born and raised in the slums. Although I had never thought about us like that in the past, I had been made aware of this once we started living here. For that reason, I had to overcome this handicap. As such, I felt nothing but gratitude to Rouché for hardening her heart and training us strictly.

While there weren’t people who would directly judge us to our faces and tell us: ‘You are only here because Lady Sophia allowed it’, many thought that, no matter how much training we received, it would be useless. I was able to somewhat realize this because I had survived in the slums by reading other people’s expressions. 

However, precisely for that reason, Rouché’s stern eyes were now scrutinizing the way I conducted myself. In these conditions, I wasn’t able to move with confidence no matter what I did.

Since I was raised in the slums, it was never expected of me to move in any way that would draw people’s attention. It was natural for me to live by making my body appear smaller so that people wouldn’t catch sight of me.

“Emma, nothing will change if you do that.”

“I… I apologize.”

“Didn’t I tell you to have self-confidence? What are you doing apologizing to me?”

“I apolo… gize….”

I felt miserable for being unable to meet her expectations, and I felt like crying. As I hung my head low, trying to control my tears, Rouché gently patted my head, saying, “Let’s end our training here for today.

“Emma. You’re not a quitter. You were able to learn many things from our etiquette lessons in such a small amount of time. Actually, regarding etiquette, you are learning faster than Roy.”

When it came to combat training, which we learned to protect the young Lady, Roy was improving faster. However, it seemed that my etiquette was improving faster than my older brother’s.

“However, that’s why your movements are oozing with nervousness.”

“…How do I become self-confident?”

“Hmm… let me think. As you can imagine, it’s probably a matter of experience.”

“A matter of… experience?”

Most of the servants working at the Marquis household were either low-ranked nobles, people who weren’t nobles but came from prominent households or wealthy merchants, so they all seemed to have experienced going to parties and such things before coming here. For that reason, they were usually reasonably experienced by the time they started working.

“But I am…”

“That’s right. You don’t have any experience in this matter. Having said that, it’s true that you can’t just go to some wealthy merchant’s house to get practice either… Oh, I just got a great idea!”

A satisfied smile showed on Rouché’s face.

While Rouché was a kind, albeit stern teacher, her real nature could be described as: behaving with abandon. Since I had heard teacher Cyril telling me something like this before, I had an extremely bad premonition when seeing her smile.

And my feeling was correct. 

Later, at the school academy inside the royal city, where the children of nobles were concentrated:.

Within the school grounds, there was the school building, auditorium and training rooms. Besides these buildings, there was a banquet hall, as well as many buildings in a row used by children of prominent nobles and factions.

They were on the same level as the buildings found in the noble district. In one of the residences, one that was considered to be superior even amongst these, a splendid tea party was taking place today.

It was the tea party of Lady Sophia’s faction, classified as one of the Commoners’ factions. 

For some reason, I was forced to attend this party as a maid. While the other maids repeatedly told me not to step forward, I wouldn’t have even dreamt of stepping forward even if they hadn’t done so. Although I could hear Lady Sophia and her friends talking in an easygoing manner, these friends of Lady Sophia’s were all noble ladies.

If I were to make a single mistake, they would probably only be satisfied when I got fired for it.

“Don’t worry, don’t worry, if you say you made a mistake, Lady Sophia will cover for you,” Rouché told me, but, if there was an occasion during which the master I am supposed to serve had to cover for me, it would be a big problem. 

For a while now, I was standing with my back so straight it began to hurt, my body stiff and with a forced smile on my face. If anyone were to peer into my face, they would notice the cold sweat pouring down my forehead, and, if anyone looked into my eyes, they surely would notice that they were swirling dizzily.

Rouché was so unreasonable!

‘Air, I’m air!’, I told myself, standing straight.

Before me, the leisurely tea party went on.

***

Fragrant black tea accompanied with a variety of rare sweets. Faced with the delicacies that they could only taste at Sophia’s tea parties, the young ladies’ faces had easy smiles.

These girls were the so-called Cinderellas.

Ranks existed among the nobility as well, and it wasn’t unusual for children to simple-mindedly flaunt the differences in their social status to others. Therefore, the fate of children of low-rank nobles depended on whether they could get high-rank nobles to support them or not. 

For example, Ferris, who came from Viscount Arken’s household, and Lakhsmi, who came from Count Titania’s household, were both members of Sophia’s faction since the first school term. The two of them were extraordinary and therefore had attended the school academy since elementary school.

However, the majority of the nobles attending the academy since that age were high ranking nobles. While count households were classified as high ranking nobles, they belonged to the lowest ranks inside of this group. Both of these girls belonged to class A, and, since a Viscount was even lower ranked than a Count, it went without saying that Ferris’ day-to-day life was very tough, although so was Lakhsmi’s. 

However – no, precisely for that reason, these girls, who were separated from the groups that had been already established during their elementary years, were free to attend Sophia’s tea party since the first day of middle school.

The faction established by the daughter of a marquis, who held immense power. Although it could be said that simply being able to be part of the faction was very significant already, in the blink of an eye, Sophia’s faction had also become very influential, and it was even acquainted with the royal family. They became so powerful that they were currently one of the best factions at the middle school level.

The people who had joined this up-and-coming faction up to that point were all considered its core members. Although the people surrounding them were even more jealous than before, the number of people who would do something to them directly had decreased dramatically. Above all else, people who just wanted to become friends with them were gathering around, more than ever before.

During this tea party, the girls were getting worked up over this topic.

However, there was one person who had a gloomy face. It was Ferris, the Viscount’s daughter. Due to her restless behaviour, the maid who worked for her was growing anxious, but the girl herself didn’t notice.

“By the way, is something the matter, Miss Ferris? You’ve been sighing for a while. Is there something troubling you?” Sophia asked her, noticing Ferris’ strange behaviour. Within this unassuming concern, there was another one hiding inside.

If Sophia, who was the leader of this faction, were to simply ask why she was sighing, she would run the risk of making it sound like she was demanding to know if she was dissatisfied with the tea party. In order to avoid that, Sophia additionally asked if something was troubling her. 

Although they were children of noble ancestry and received top-class education, normally,  children attending middle school wouldn’t express such an indirect concern nor utter such an exchange.

However, when it came to Sophia, it wasn’t unusual at all. Every time this happened, the meaning of Sophia’s roundabout phrases would get explained to the members of the faction by their servants, so the young ladies had become a little more perceptive.

Therefore, everyone understood that it wasn’t Sophia’s intention to accuse Ferris. And Ferris herself realized that not only had she behaved rudely but also that she was forgiven for it.

“I- I apologize. There’s something that has been weighing heavily on my mind.”

“Something weighing heavily on your mind? Would you like to talk about it? I might not be the best person you would like to confide in, but…”

“It- It isn’t like that… Um, would you hear me out?”

Sophia answered her by gently smiling.

Although the girl who passed the entrance exams with a top score and who became the head student of the noble course’s class A still looked very young, she exuded a sense of trustworthiness that made it seem like, no matter what one might consult with her, she would have an answer.

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Faced with the girl’s confident demeanor, Ferries exhaled, as if struck by envy.

“Truth be told, I was invited to a party hosted by a Count’s household that I haven’t interacted with much.”

Lady Sophia tilted her head just a little to side in confusion, but a light of understanding flashed in the eyes of the other young ladies.

To be invited by a noble that was higher ranked than oneself was generally considered an honour. Inviting someone to your party, even if they were of a lower rank than oneself, was still considered to have its merit. Doubly so, if you weren’t close to the person you were inviting.

However, the young ladies affiliated with Sophia’s faction were now receiving invitations left and right. Among these, many of the invites were coming from higher-ranked nobles, so, although it was a great honor, at the same time, these were invitations that were difficult to refuse. If these invitations were arriving due to the young ladies’ own charm, surely, the ladies would have been delighted by them. However, a lot of the time, the reason why they were getting invited was solely because they were core members of Sophia’s faction.

In short, it could be said that Ferris being invited to the party was the result of the Count’s daughter wanting to become a member of Sophia’s faction, and zeroing in on Ferris to use her as her stepping stone.

“Of course, I don’t intend to behave in any way that would cause you any trouble, Miss Sophia. But, since her noble status is above mine, I am utterly at a loss on how I should refuse her…”

When Ferris sighed, all the other young ladies nodded simultaneously. It seemed that the other ladies could tell how she was feeling. Noticing this as well, Sophia tilted her head in puzzlement one more time, the same way she had before.

“Wouldn’t it be better to just stop worrying about it and accept?”

“To… accept? However, the reason why she invited me is likely my connection to you, Lady Sophia. After getting invited by a higher-ranked noble, if she were to pressure me, saying that she wanted me to introduce her to you, I wouldn’t be able to refuse.”

To invite a lower-ranked noble and, after welcoming them lavishly, ask them for a favour. In other words, doing this could become a threat as well, as if saying: “Since I have done all this, surely you won’t refuse me, right?”

Nevertheless, one could also refuse after getting invited to a party. Setting aside whether one could actually refuse or not, one was more or less given the option to do so. 

In addition, if one were to attend the event, there wouldn’t be any way for them to escape. This was common knowledge among the young ladies.

However-

“You don’t need to refuse. If she pressures you by taking advantage of her own position, I won’t mind if you respond by telling her that you will run it by me. I will take care of these bothersome issues,” Lady Sophia declared.

“Moreover, if it’s someone I don’t like, I will keep you safe by receiving them and talking to them, and if it is someone I do like, forming a connection with them after receiving them and conversing with them will be good,” she added.

“As we are going to enter high society one day, it’s important to form connections with influential nobles. What will you do if you don’t properly make use of this rare chance?”

“B-but, won’t I cause you trouble by doing that, Miss Sophia?” 

The girls who received Sophia Rosenberg’s patronage naturally thought that, of course, they shouldn’t do things that would cause Sophia trouble.

However-

“From the day I started these tea parties, I was prepared to protect you. Therefore, those kinds of worries are unnecessary. If there is something you are troubled by, please rely on me. Alright?”

Sophia smiled calmly.

She was twelve years old, yet she already possessed the poise of the daughter of a marquis. The young ladies who became members of Sophia’s faction confirmed the reliability of their faction’s representative once more.

Therefore, all of the girls thought the following:

‘To a debutante in waiting like me, it truly is important to form connections with prominent nobles. For that reason, I want to treasure my bond with Miss Sophia above the bond with anyone else.’ 

Like this, the unity of Sophia’s faction strengthened.

***

The tea party ended without any problems, although my stomach started hurting from the pressure and stress of suddenly being sent in here. 

Either way, the tea party was now over, and we were on our way back to the second residence of the Rosenberg household. Rouché was the one who was supposed to ride in the same carriage as the young Lady, but, for some reason, I was the one who ended up riding with her.

My lady sat beside me, and I was intently staring at her profile. The difference between our ages was just two years, but Lady Sophia was full of self-confidence, and she was very beautiful. 

I heard that this wasn’t a recent change either, and that she had been this self-assured for many years. 

“…Emma, is everything alright? You’ve been looking at my face so intently.”

“I-I’m terribly sorry!”

“You don’t need to apologize. More importantly, don’t you have something you want to ask me?”

“…Eh?”

“You’ve been looking at me that way for a while.”

Just how insightful was the young Lady? I was astonished, but, at the same time, I thought: ‘This is my chance!’. A mere servant wasn’t usually allowed to address the master they were meant to serve. However, that was different from my current situation, since I had been addressed by my Lady.

“Truth be told… I was scolded by Rouché. She told me to have more self-confidence. And so I was wondering how and when I would be able to be so full of self-confidence like you, Lady Sophia.”

“…Self-confidence?”

Lady Sophia frowned a little, as if she felt troubled.

“I-I apologize! I spoke out of turn!2 Please, forgive me.”

“No, I don’t mind. It’s just… since I don’t have self-confidence, I was thinking about how I should answer your question.”

“…You have no… self-confidence?”

I blinked in surprise. She was the daughter of a marquis and acted in a manner appropriate to her social status. I also heard that she achieved top marks in the entrance exam for the school academy, in which nobles from all over the country gathered, and that she confidently filled out the role of the new students’ representative. 

Even though she told me that she didn’t have any self-confidence, I couldn’t hear it as anything but a joke.

“Excuse my rudeness, but I cannot believe that you have no self-confidence, my Lady. Weren’t you perfectly confident during the tea party earlier?”

“That’s not due to me having self-confidence. I was just pretending to be self-confident, that’s all.”

“You were just pretending?”

So although in reality, she wasn’t self-confident, she pretended that she was. While I could understand the meaning of her words, I couldn’t just suddenly accept that the confident way in which she behaved in front of the young ladies next to her was all an act.

However, Lady Sophia said, “It’s true,” and smiled.

“Even right now, I am actually nervous about being able to advise you well.”

The Lady Sophia who kept smiling gently seemed like a perfectly calm young lady. Despite being told that she was actually nervous, who would believe her, since she behaved so confidently? It was unbelievable to such a degree, that I considered whether she, perhaps, might be making fun of me.

However-

“This is something Cyril told me before. ‘People such as the daughters of a marquis cannot reveal their feelings recklessly. They have to be able to act gracefully, no matter how anxious they feel on the inside,’ he said.” 

“…And so you became able to pretend that you are confident, my Lady?”

If one would become able to act confidently simply by being told to do so, I wouldn’t have had such a hard time. In response to this question of mine, Lady Sophia slowly shook her head.

“At first, I thought that it was difficult. In order to act with confidence, you need the confidence of knowing that, even if you were to fail, you would be backed up by someone. I can act confidently precisely because I am confident that no matter the situation, I will somehow be able to deal with it.”

“I… see.”

If one didn’t have that confidence, they couldn’t act confidently. And yet, Lady Sophia said that, although she didn’t have self-confidence, she was able to act with confidence. Her words were contradictory. Could it be a concept that was beyond my level of understanding?

“You are being taught by Rouché, correct?”

“Yes, that’s correct. Rouché has been teaching me a lot of things.”

“Although she usually acts quite carelessly, she can be actually extremely attentive, am I right? Doesn’t she always smoothly cover for you, even when you make mistakes?”

“…Yes. She always helps me out.”

It was just like that during today’s tea party as well. Rouché had skillfully maneuvered around me for my sake, as if it was alright for me, who was scared stiff, not to move at all. It wasn’t an exaggeration to say that I was able to make it through without making any mistakes thanks to Rouché.

“Hehe. You’re the same as me. Since that’s the case, you’ll be fine.”

“Um… what do you mean?”

“It won’t be difficult for you to act confidently, as long as you have faith in Rouché. I mean, you’re confident that she would definitely cover for you, right?”

“…About that…”

Being able to act confidently stemmed from being confident that, even if one made a mistake, the damage would be minimized. In other words, no matter how badly one might mess up, if they had the confidence that they would be able to get a passing mark, acting with confidence was possible.

Lady Sophia told me to: “Don’t dwell on that part and think about what I said.”

In other words, she was saying that, since Rouché would back me up no matter what mistake I might make, I should act confidently without any worries.

“Doing something like that…”

“I know how you feel. You’re probably thinking that, by making a mistake, you might cause her trouble. But those who act with confidence make fewer mistakes in general.”

This meant that, since not being able to act confidently was a problem, I would be more likely to meet Rouché’s expectations if I acted confidently by thinking that Rouché would do something to help me if I were to make a mistake. 

Although one could say that I understood the concept, whether I would be able to put it into practice was a completely different issue. I was able to relax slightly when I thought of Rouché watching over me, but the anxiety of potentially causing her trouble didn’t disappear.

Despite this, I felt more capable of acting with confidence than up until now.

“Thank you very much, Lady Sophia. I don’t think it’s possible for me to become confident right away, but I believe I can act with a little more confidence now.”

“As long as I was able to be of help. But, please be careful. There is one single flaw to this way of thinking.”

“A flaw?”

“Yes. As long as that person is able to help you out, it seems like, no matter what happens, everything will turn out alright. However, if you’re ever unable to tell whether that person can help you or not, you will become very anxious.”

Lady Sophia told me that “In order to avoid that situation, it’s important to lay the groundwork so that that person is able to help you.” Once I heard that, I unexpectedly became doubtful.

I was relying on Rouché. But there were many things that even Rouché couldn’t do. For example, Rouché couldn’t do anything against a person who could exert their political power over her.  And she didn’t even have any combat training.

If that was the case, then-

“Who are you relying on to act with confidence, Lady Sophia?”

The Lady Sophia who was always able to act confidently. Who was the one that this Lady Sophia relied on? Faced with this question, Lady Sophia looked a little bashful. This mushy atmosphere reminded me of my kind teacher’s face.

“Could it be…”

“Let’s keep it a secret from Cyril, alright?”

My master placed her index finger to her lips and smiled like a mischievous child.

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Thank you so much reading! <3 The next side story will be about Raymond!