Chapter 29 - Her First Love (2)

"Alex, I Love You."

Alex stiffened. He had never been confessed before. It was him that confessed to his wife. He was his first love and he had never flirted with anyone before her.

Right now, his heart was beating fast. He didn't know that being confessed to, could make him feel this happy.

"April, can you look at me?" Alex lifted her chin up, he wanted to see her eyes. It makes a big difference, if she was looking at him.

April opened her eyes. Alex's blue eyes wasn't condemning her, instead he looked at her like he wanted to hear it again.

"I have always loved you, Alex." April confessed her feelings. It was much easier now.

Alex's heart grew warm, he smiled at her. "When did you start loving me?"

April blushed. "When we first met. In the Smith's living room."

Love at first sight, Alex thought. How old was she then? 15? 16? While he was around 22? At that time, he was still dating Francesca. God knew how long it took him to convince his wife to marry him. Even though they were together since Highschool, they didn't got married till they were 24. It might still look too young to marry. At that time, he was sure that she was the one.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He softly asked. He knew how hard it must've been for her to confess. Even now that they had crossed a line, that shouldn't be crossed.

"How could I? I'm even more mentally unstable back then. I was in and out of rehab and you were perfectly happy with your girlfriend back then. Why should I try to butt in? I would never want you to be unhappy." April looked down, she couldn't look at Alex anymore. She was too embarrassed with her own words.

Alex held a firm gripped on her chin, he wasn't going to let her escape this time. It was too late for that. "April, look at me." He commanded.

April gulped, her eyes looked at his again. This time, she felt like her insides was melting.

"All this time, you really didn't hated me?" Alex still couldn't believe it. He thought that April was just saying those words to him earlier today.

"How could I? You were like the Sun to me. Everytime I secretly look at you, you were smiling happily. Your world was colorful than mine. Sometimes it made me wish, to be a part of that world". A tear fell down on her cheeks. What she had said was true.

Alex's world was indeed colorful. He had everything he wanted. Family, Friends and a Lover. He was surrounded by mesmerizing people. He had never faced any hardsh.i.p.s. He never had nightmares nor terrible demons inside his head. April used to envy him and yet loved him at the same time.

Unlike April, her demons was her bestfriends. They didn't want to leave her, they were her companions in life.

Alex wiped away her tears. He pulled April into his arms and patted her back.

"I'm sorry for not noticing baby. Don't worry, I'm here now. You may wish to be a part of my world, but I'd rather be part of yours. Together with our son, we will slowly build our own family." He kissed her hair. Her confession brought new realization on his head. He needed time to think this through. Now that he knew how being loved supposed to feel like, he didn't want to let it go.

"But your wife?" April buried her face in his chest. Even if it hurts, she needed to address this issue. She didn't like being a Mistress. She didn't want to be the third wheel.

"Give me time baby. Can you give me this?" Alex looked at her in the eyes. She looked lovelier, even in tears.

It was a promise, It was a hope that love can blossom between them. Her mind was screaming "NO!, Don't believe promises." Yet heart was wanting any kind of attention, that Alex was willing throw at her way.

April nodded, she was willing to wait. Even without this promise, she was already happy. She was willing to believe anything at this point. She was in that deep abyss, there were no longer any chances of coming up.

"Thank you baby." Alex kissed her in the lips. He meant what he said. He just needed time. It would be unfair for anyone, if he said that he no longer love his wife. It will always be there. Yet Alex can't deny that April didn't grew on him. Ever since he spent his time with her and their son, he was constantly looking out for her. It may not be was he planned at first, but plans can always change.

After the kiss, they were both gasping for air. That kiss they just shared, was different from those hungry kisses. This time, there was something beautiful to it. It was like, their hearts was slowly connecting to each other. Time was moving slow.

"Alex? I still have another thing to say." April whispered as she calmed herself down. His lips was to die for, she thought.

"Yes baby?" Alex smirked. He could still taste her sweet lips on his tongue.

"That night, I'd like to tell you what exactly happened." April pursed her lips.

Alex tilted his head, letting her continue. He didn't mind about not knowing. Yet, a part of him also wanted to know.

"Well. A couple of months back, before your bachelor party. I heard from Colm that you were getting married. I got sad and honestly depressed. That time, it didn't help that I was more mentally unstable. They had to send me to an institution for a longer period of time.

I guess the news brought me down a lot. My episodes got frequent and I almost couldn't recognize anyone again. I'm not saying this because I want your pity. I just wanted to be honest with you." April took a deep breath and looked at Alex in the eyes.

Alex was still listening intently, trying to understand her. He didn't know that his marriage brought so much pain to her. He felt guilty for adding more troubles to her life.

"After that, it took me so long to overcome it. When I did, I was able to get out that place. That same day, I heard that you were having a bachelor's party for your friends in the US. I told my parents that I wanted to see Colm that night, since he went to your party. I had them dropped me off the hotel, I told them that Colm already knew that I was coming. That he will sent me home himself. I insisted my parents to let me go, It took me a while before they did. It was already pass 10 o'clock in the evening, when I arrived at the hotel. Anyway, that was my excuse.

I didn't came for Colm, I went to see you that night. I wanted to see you, One last time. Before you get married, before you became farther away from my grasp.

When I got there, I asked around if anyone saw you. At the same time, I was desperately hiding from Colm. Someone told me, that they saw you heading back upstairs. He introduced himself as Cefei and he gave me your room number.

When I got there, I saw you almost passed out in the hallway. I never would have expected to see you there. I instantly went to help you out, but I couldn't even lift you up. You were already drugged then, I only thought you were drunk. You were puking and were mumbling to yourself.

Good thing that a staff came pass us. He helped me bring you to your room. He said he knew you, that you were with the bachelor party. I didn't had any clue back then, I only thought that you looked awful and sick. Thank goodness that you had your hotel card with you, that's how we were able to bring you in.

When we got you rested inside your room, the staff instantly excused himself. He seem kinda on a rush to get out. He said he will contact your friends and get their help. He never came back though.

Just then, you started undressing yourself. You were mumbling that it was too hot. You asked someone to turn the AC up. But before I could even move away, you pulled me to the bed and kiss my lips." April took a deep breath again.

She had never spoken this much before. She had experience a lot of new things with Alex around. Her mind was a lot stable and her heart was calmer. Well, except that her heart get too excited at certain times.