April woke up the next day. She had been too closed to death multiples times, this wasn't new to her. There were certain times before when she tried to commit suicide, it only stopped when Sky came along.
She noticed that she were in the same room that she woke up to, almost a month ago. No one was inside the room, except of her. Two anxiety attacks in a month, it was getting more frequent again. The more she becomes happier, the more her past wouldn't let her go.
Whoever sent those pictures to her, knows what she had been through. It was more likely that, it was the man who had been haunting her dreams. For what she could remember, the man had been put in jail for at least 10 years up to 20 years. There was a chance that he had been released already. If that was the case, the possibility of him coming for her is very high.
April closed her eyes very tight, she didn't think that she is capable of seeing him again. If only she had died back then, everything would have been settled. She wouldn't have ruined Alex's marriage. Even though Sky was a blessing to her, he was still born as an illegitimate child.
She felt dirty and undeserving of Alex's attention. No one could love a woman who had been touched by several men. April didn't want to put him through this nor their son. Even if Alex's seriously love her, she would still find it hard to believe. She knew that Alex was kind but it could also be form of rebound. Alex was desperate of attention, love and affection. Since she was willing to give all of these, chances are he is only into her because of the current circ.u.mstances.
Alex and Francesca's is love can never be forgotten that fast. Although it may seem that their marriage is falling, there is also chances that they could fix it. They could always rekindle their love again and reminisce their past. Their love could always be there for each other, just gotten buried by work and time. There could be a time that Alex would go back to his wife.
This phase that he is experiencing right now, could only be temporary for him. As of right now, April is confused and doubting her own judgment. She wanted to believe in him and yet at the same time, she just couldn't. Her confidence on at the very bottom of the well.
How could she fight a losing battle? How could she stood up in front of a perfect woman? How will she react if Alex's would turn back? What would happen to her and to their son? Was she supposed to wait? or to go head strong and fight for her spot?
No matter what, someone else knows her past. Whoever that person is, had the upper hand.
She did thought about Francesca. Francesca would gain a lot once April is out of the picture. Alex would be hers again and it will grow old together. April on the other hand, would suffer until she dies.
Either way, she was scared and helpless. She didn't know what to do nor if she should tell on anybody. She was so used to having this problem on her own. April didn't want to burden anybody nor ask for anybody's pity.
She was so weak and tired at the same time. Will there able be a day, where she could see clear skies? To gain her confidence back and to be deserving of someone's love?
Right now, she didn't think so. She was so full of negativity, that she was willing to shove everybody away from her. But what about Alex? She had already let Alex into her life. April already confessed to him about her inner Demons and Nightmares. Letting him in wasn't easy.
She would give him this chance and hopes that he will not fail her. For he is the only one that she could count on at this time.