Chapter 167 Tears and Heaven
Darcy couldn’t help shaking after she regained consciousness. It took her a moment before she could even reply to the maids. “I am fine, I want to be alone.” She told them.
Once they left she looked outside the window. It was still morning, the sun soft.
Breedmate!
She shivered again, pulling her legs up to her chest and wrapping her arms around herself. She sat there for what felt like forever trying to fight flashbacks of the horror she went through, trying to stabilize her heartbeat and breathing so she wouldn’t lose consciousness again.
She wiped the sweat from her forehead and the maids had already returned to ask her to have lunch but she refused. She couldn’t bring herself to swallow anything. All she could think of was trying to get past her nightmare and the word that haunted her. She couldn’t think beyond that.
After a while, she went to open the window to find fresh air to breathe. Her breath still came out fast and she breathed in sharply. It only increased the pain in her chest.
Breedmate!
Oh, Lord! Stop!
She had to find something. She looked through the drawers for her weapons. Grabbing one of her pistols, she held it tightly in her hand. Fighting had been one of the things to help her cope. She looked at the pistol, telling herself she was safe.
“Next time you will be strong enough to defend yourself. No one will hurt you unless you let them,” she reminisced Captain Joseph’s words that were her mantra to calm down.
No one would hurt her again. No one.
Her heartbeat slowed down and she was about to feel proud when she realized the room was dark. She had spent the whole day like this. Tears filled her eyes, knowing she was still fragile and scared.
The maids came back, pausing when they saw her with the pistol in her hand. She put it away not to scare them.
“Dinner, My Lady.” This time Ida looked at her pleadingly while Janet went to light some candles.
Dinner? Would she have to leave the room? Her heart began to misbehave again after all the attempts. She needed more time.
“Can I have it here?”
“Of course.”
Darcy was served dinner in her room but she couldn’t bring herself to eat much. She recalled this morning, eating with Ephraim and her heart froze.
Ephraim.
Breedmate!
Her breath hitched again and when she felt her head sway she forced the breath out.
No! She couldn’t stay here or she would get used to it and lock herself away. Every progress she had made would go to waste. She was a dragon slayer for God’s sake.
She grabbed her pistol to calm her and then left the room. The halls were dark as usual and his scent… it lingered in the darkness.
Ephraim. She looked around as if expecting him to be there. He wasn’t. She looked ahead, avoiding negative thoughts she just allowed the darkness to swallow her but the darkness was his thing. It just reminded her of him and she found comfort in it. She could understand why he liked it. She felt invisible.
Darcy walked through the darkness, allowing it to calm her down, to clear her mind from fears. Slowly she left her nightmares behind with each step she took along the long hall. She didn’t even know it or where she was going but she remembered a few things. The first time she held his hand as they walked down the hall. She had trusted him to lead the way. Even their first kiss was in the darkness.
Ephraim.
She stopped and looked around again. He felt so close like he was part of the darkness. He had spent so many years alone. Her heart ached. Her hold on the pistol tightened and she continued down the hall. She arrived at a parlor, lit up by a fire burning in the hearth.
She hadn’t been here before. The furniture… it was made by him. She went ahead and touched the carvings, feeling like she was close to him just by touching what he made.
Ephraim.
The tears were difficult to fight back. She didn’t know what he meant by her being his breedmate but he wasn’t like those people. He just wasn’t. He had always taken initiative to kiss her and hold her but he has also been the one to stop first and hold back. He had saved her, taken care of her, and provided her with safety and an environment where she could overcome most of her fears and heal. But… why did he do it? That question remained.
She had always thought he treated her with more care than others and she had wondered why. Now… it was all because of her scent? Because she was his breedmate, whatever that meant.
“Darcy, I hope to never part from you.” She recalled his words and the pain that thickened his voice. “I want you to know and remember that I would never hurt you.”
More tears streamed down her face and she wiped them with the back of her hand. She believed him but the word still sent tremors down her spine. The word and the fact that she could just be picked by scent made her stomach turn. Made her want to hide.
She touched her pistol, rubbing it and feeling it in her hand to calm down and not panic. She didn’t like the panic. She felt as though she was being strangled each time or that she was drowning.
Darcy continued to venture and when she found the way out to the garden she stepped outside. She breathed in the cool fresh air as she found her way to the fountain. They had spent a lot of time near it and she recalled all those recent days that had been the best days in her life. She looked at the bench where they had shared a few kisses.
She couldn’t ignore this dread and sickness but at the same time, she couldn’t ignore what she knew about him. It pained her to know what he had been through, how he spent so many years in loneliness, roaming in the dark, helping her people without taking credit.
She would have to calm down eventually and face him. Talk to him without panicking.
Sitting on the bench, she leaned back and tried to relax the tension in her body. The pain was coming back from being tense for too long.
“Darcy?”
With a gasp, she jumped startled in her seat. Her head turned swiftly. Ephraim was standing in front of the fountain, a distance away. He had a look of concern on his face.
“Ephraim,” she stood slowly from her seat, reminding herself to keep breathing steadily.
“I wanted to come to you earlier, but I did not wish to scare you.” He said.
She just stared, her lips parting but again her breathing became sharp and she sucked it in too fast causing it to cut through her lungs.
“Perhaps you are not ready to talk yet. I can leave,” he said, taking a step sideways.
“Don’t,” it came it out as barely a whisper but he heard her.
Ephraim became still, where he stood. He then waited for her to say something but she didn’t.
“I am sorry,” he apologized. “I wanted us to have this time so I could explain better and not cause you pain but I failed. I do not wish to see you hurt. It hurts me.”
Tears streamed down her face and she looked down. She was still holding her pistol.
“If you let me, I would like to explain. Slower.” He took a step toward her and she looked up at him again. “Would you allow me?”
“I just want to ask a question… or two,” she began trying to see through the tears. Ephraim nodded. “Is there anything besides my scent that you like?”
A gentle smile curved his lips. “I might have saved you because of your scent but Darcy, if it was only your scent I might have succeeded in staying away from you. I have fought so hard to keep a distance but the more I got to know you, the more I wanted to be with you.”
He stepped closer again as the tears continued to escape her eyes. “Seeing you grow and overcome your fears made me want to overcome mine. Watching you build relationships, and find happiness in small things made me want to pursue my own happiness. You make me want to step out of the darkness, Darcy. To make my own path and I want to walk that path with you.”
Darcy was a mess at this point. Her emotions were pouring everywhere.
“Darcy,” he stepped closer looking like he wanted to hug her in her emotional state. He paused for a moment and then he just did. He walked over and wrapped his arms around her. The warmth and comfort just made her release all of her other kept emotions. He stroked her hair as she just cried and cried, wetting his shirt and making her eyes and her head hurt.
Ephraim picked her up. She wasn’t sure why but she let him. “You need to eat,” he told her as he took her inside. Darcy leaned against him feeling tired and in pain.
“I will take you to my room. Is that alright?”
She nodded.
She had no idea how he could see in the darkness but he navigated through it easily and they arrived at his room. He placed her gently on his bed. “Is the pistol to shoot me?” He asked looming over her.
She smiled. “No,” she put it aside on the bedstand.
“I will bring some food,” he said but she grabbed his wrist before he could leave.
“I just want to rest,” she told him.
He took the hint and got into bed with her, holding her close in his arms. “My second question,” she whispered.
“Hmm…”
“What do I smell like?” She asked.
“You smell like spring and strawberries and blossom.”
“That sounds heavenly.”
He sighed, pulling her closer. “You are heaven to me.”
Warmth spread through her. Heaven? She closed her eyes and slept in the heaven that she found in his arms.
The morning after, she woke up from being hungry. The scent of coffee and scrambled eggs filled her nostrils. She turned around noticing that Ephraim already came with food. She sat upright with a smile as he came to place the bed table in front of her.
“Your stomach was angry and growling so I got scared and left to bring breakfast.” He said.
“Thank you,” she blushed. “But this service is making me lazy.”
“You can afford to be lazy with me,” he told her.
She went back to being her hungry self and finished everything quickly.
“I’ll be gone for a while,” he began. “Remember I told you about my mother being a dragon tamer?”
She nodded.
“I found out there might be a dragon tamer in our time now.”
“There is? Who?”
“He is a customer of mine. He fights dragons and makes incredible weapons. He is also a tamer it seems.”
She nodded thoughtfully.
“He can also speak the ancient language. Only a few tamers have the ability so he could be a powerful ally if he wants to work with us.”
“Will you see him in person?”
“Yes. He is a cunning man so he won’t accept anything less.”
Darcy was worried. “Can he be trusted? He is against dragons so he might not be so… welcoming.”
Ephraim smiled. “It will be alright,” he said pinching her chin gently.
This made her nervous.