Chapter 180 - Running Away [3]

Xue Ruyue, first and only daughter of Xue Yebai, Patriarch of the Xue clan, the little princess of the Xue clan.

These were the identities that made up who Ruyue was in the eyes of others, and the traits that represented her.

It was the person she was forced to be from the second she was born.

Even at a young age, she wasn’t shown the love a child should know. Be it her father, her mother, her older brother, or her extended family within the clan, none of them thought much of her.

The Xue Clan was once a matriarchy, being one of the very few within the cultivation world that could hold such a hierarchy successfully, but that all changed many decades ago.

The throne was usurped and the clan was changed, becoming patriarchal like almost every other power in the Cloud Plane.

But, the Xue clan used to be a matriarchy for a reason. The women of the clan were usually the ones who inherited the greatest talents, as the clan was centralized around elements that were primarily yin in nature.

Even Ruyue was the same. She was born with immense talents and rather than having a yin attributed element, she had an affinity to yin itself.

It was a threat to the patriarchy. If Ruyue ever grew up to be powerful enough, she could very well usurp the throne once again and nobody would dare object.

For this reason, she was always shunned. She was looked down upon and seen solely as a tool to further the goals of the Xue clan. They figured that as long as they continued like this, she would never become a danger to them.

She grew up never knowing love. She grew up without smiling. There were only two people she could truly show her smile towards, the guard and housemaid couple that took care of her as if she was their own daughter.

Even when her parents abandoned her, they were there, caring for her needs and raising her properly. For this, she could never be more grateful.

When she reached the age of 16, the visits started. From the other 4 great clans to people from the major sects, they all visited the Xue clan for a chance to gain her hand in marriage.

And with the way she was just a pawn to those higher-ups in her clan, they naturally accepted all these visits.

She was forced to entertain those young masters and elders who looked at her body with lewd thoughts evident in their gazes. The yin essence of someone with an affinity for yin would be much stronger than that of a normal maiden.

But even after all these years of her self-confidence being shattered by her clan, Ruyue had still developed a sense of identity. This was due to those two that raised her with proper morals.

She had no desire to be a tool for her clan’s growth. She despised the clan itself.

And with all these years going by, seeing how nobody actually cared about her and only cared for her materialistic value, she developed an ice-cold exterior.

She pushed away everyone and everything and developed an unapproachable air. She became someone those young masters would fear trying to court.

Doing so would only lead to their misery.

She trained in secret and managed to reach 2nd class at the age of 18, allowing her to be somewhat free from the constant marriage proposals that were thrown at her.

But she ended up in a situation she couldn’t control. Her parents had chosen to wed her off to an elder of the Jade Heavenly Palace. There was no way she could escape the situation the way she had been doing all these years.

So she took drastic measures. She fled the Xue clan and after many months, arrived at the Celestial Star Palace. She passed their disciple examination and climbed the ranks, catching the attention of Grand Elder Tian Yang in the process.

At first, she wanted to reject, thinking he was just like the rest of those creeps who wanted her body. But she realized she needed backing within the sect to protect her from her clan and the Jade Heavenly Palace.

In the end, she accepted his tutorship. And as time passed, she realized that he was nothing like what she had thought of him.

He would rarely actually teach her things, giving her pointers to lead her in the right direction and then leaving the rest to her. Whenever he looked at her, she could only see the gaze of a master towards his disciple.

She started warming up to him, seeing him as her true master. And with his guidance, she was able to achieve 3rd class by the time she turned 20. It was an unprecedented growth speed.

But trouble came seeking her. Her clan and the Elder she was supposed to be wed to demanded her presence. She believed that there was no hope for her, even if she had backing.

But within the next few months, all those demands and approaches died down. Why did that happen? At the time, she had no idea. But now, she knew that Tian Yang had acted.

With his strength and position, there weren’t many who could oppose him. Especially not someone with less strength than the 2nd greatest sect on the entire Plane.

She continued her training under Tian Yang without worries, slowly opening up to him. And then, someone else appeared.

A new disciple that her master claimed would be her Junior Brother. At first, she hated the thought of him. Not only was he a man, but he was also going to break the peaceful daily life that she treasured so much.

But unexpectedly, she warmed up to him faster than she had with even Tian Yang. He was arrogant, he was occasionally shameless, and he got on her nerves whenever he got the opportunity, but she couldn’t find it in herself to hate him.

Why was that? She couldn’t figure it out at first. But slowly, she began to understand.

From the beginning, he disregarded her status. Whether it be as his Senior Sister or as the little princess of the Xue clan, he didn’t care about it at all.

When she acted haughty towards him, he would immediately do the same to her. It was an attitude and approach she had never experienced before.

He…genuinely just saw her as another person.

This kind of attitude inadvertently melted the icy wall she had erected around herself. The way she got annoyed and argued with him forced her to become more social.

And she didn’t hate the feeling at all. It made her feel like she was regaining the youth that was taken away from her.

But with the situation that had just occurred, she felt that such youth wasn’t something she needed.

She had gone on many missions already and she had witnessed her fair share of violence and carnage, but she never felt anything of it. Perhaps because she was as cold and indifferent as she was.

But now, in this place, she felt the pain that such emotions could bring. She felt how terrible the lows could be in contrast to how exhilarating the highs were.

And she hated that. She didn’t want to feel such emptiness and such sorrow. She liked it better when she could just ignore everything around her and be indifferent.

But as he embraced her and brushed his hands through her hair, she couldn’t bring herself to do that.

“Why won’t you let me do that?” She cried as she hugged him tightly. She thought that after hearing her story, he might allow her to do as she pleased.

But Damien just smiled in response. “You see, I tried the same thing, but in the end, it’ll only bring you greater pain.”

He thought about the guilt he felt for running away from his feelings for Rose. It was a terrible feeling.

Perhaps he could shut out his emotions like Ruyue was trying to do, but would that solve anything? No. It was just another form of running away.

“You could say that we are similar in that regard.”

He decided to share his experiences with her. He found that no matter how this senior sister of his liked to act high and mighty, at her core she was just as immature as he was.

Watching her try to take the same method of escapism that he did, he realized how silly he was being. Is this what he was trying to do this entire time with Rose? He berated himself endlessly.

Ruyue stood silently in his arms, listening to his story. It wasn’t the first time she heard him talk about his woman, but it was the first time she heard it in depth.

A strange suffocating feeling arose in her chest, but she didn’t let it affect her. Instead, she hugged him tighter as she listened to his story.

Under the silent moonlight, the duo relied on each other’s warmth, attempting to sort out the troubles that lay within their hearts.