Chapter 82 - A life is a life

Setsura tried to sleep, but whenever she did, she would recall the sight from earlier. So instead, she bolted out of bed and decided to head outside. Not after she gently placed a kiss on Akito's cheeks. He hadn't budged an inch since earlier; they remained in the same position from before. Unlike Chauncey, when Akito said he wouldn't leave her side. He really didn't. She was worried about sir Long and did want to check up on him. However, since the man took part in the party despite his injuries, he is most likely fast asleep now.

She quietly made her way to the mini kitchen area. Courtesy of sir Long, he must have considered what happened last time. What's more, considering how he knows about the nightmares, he understands it must be an inconvenience to go downstairs to fetch water. 'Even the sink looks exquisite.' Setsura thought. Even with the materials, this time, everything looks so lavish.

It's so unusual that she can't sleep, even surrounded by such great comfort. The previous night while she slept in what looked like a nice bed. Appearances are deceiving; the bed looked nice and grand, but the mattress was awfully hard, so it was only natural that she could not sleep.

Over here in the Long Mansion, everything is grand and comfortable. The bed, especially, no doubt they gave her the best guest room. But even then, she could not sleep. Sighing, Setsura placed the cup down on the sink and made her way back into the room. Akito was still fast asleep, so she tiptoed out of the door.

After she left the room, she followed the same route they took on the way inside. Soon the familiar appearance of the gardens appeared in her vision. Setsura was relieved that the staircase did not lead her out to the front of the mansion. While the party that was in full swing two hours ago had died down by now. Setsura knew that some people would still be awake and lingering around; that is why she chose to stay in the back.

Her gaze flicked towards the skies. How long has she been in the Meiji era now? A few weeks? No, it should be more or less over a month now. Another sigh escaped her lips, even though she was the one who said she should not get attached to this place. It seems like she will have a hard time letting things go, especially that person.

Setsura did not know how attached she was to Akito until this recent incident. The entire time she was putting on a front, but the reality was she felt so broken without him. Little did she know that she was not the only one who felt that way. He has become so precious to her, and she genuinely cares about him. She wants to stand by his side. But, eventually, she would have to leave this place. Now that she has participated in such a case, she would most likely get more and more involved. The more involved she gets, the sooner she will have to leave this place.

Her thoughts broke off when she felt someone approach her from the back, Setsura was cautious until she saw a familiar cloak being dr.a.p.ed across her shoulders.

"Akito.."

"Feeling restless?"

Setsura nodded, "A little, it is...hard to get to sleep after what happened." she muttered vaguely. Just talking about it made her sick, how was she going to handle future cases? Don't be so pathetic, Setsura.

Akito reached over and patted her head before she felt his arms wrap around her from the back. At first, there was nothing but silence between them. All she could hear was the sound of the leaves swaying due to the wind. "Are you trying to take advantage of me?"

"Nonsense, I'm a gentleman."

She rolled her eyes at this comment.

"Besides, if I wanted to take advantage of you. I would have done so on the bed."

She stepped on his foot, causing Akito to yelp in pain.

"Dear Setsura, why are you still using violence to solve everything."

"Isn't it because you act like a moron?" she retorted back.

"I wouldn't be a gentleman if I did not know how to comfort an upset lady."

Upset? She would not use such words to describe her current emotions. "I know from now onwards I will have to get used to seeing such things. I am prepared," Setsura nodded. Despite her fear, she is already prepared. "But, for now, the images do not leave my mind, especially since I killed someone."

Akito looked away, "You didn't hurt anyone."

She shot him a harsh glare, "Don't hide it from me. Back then, I could not remember. However, on the way here, I recalled it very well. The reason why sir Long got hurt was because he stepped in after I already cut the person down. The person I hurt did not die right away and tried to attack again, but sir Long took the brunt of the attack for me. I, with my own hands, killed a person."

Even though she said these words so easily, her heart felt heavy, and she felt her hands trembling due to the fear. Akito grabbed hold of her hands, "Your right. I won't white coat the situation. That would be rude of me; you did kill a person. No, more than one person. However, please remember Setsura. Unlike the other two, you do not have military training; you do not know how to handle an opponent who has been on drugs."

"I know, but...I…"

"Moreover, you were unlucky. The ones who aimed at you are the ones who have been taking drugs since the first day. According to the information Natasha supplied us, their bodies were done for from the very beginning. Even if they survived, they would remain as a ghost of their former selves. They would only speak a few sentences and be attacked by violent nightmares. They killed people using such brutal means and was exposed to such brutality; it would haunt them forever. Rather than live such a life, you did them a favor."

His words made sense, but she was still having a hard time accepting all of this. "A life is a life. No matter what kind of life they lived afterwards. I'm sure their families and friends would have wanted them to live. But, I destroyed even that much for them."

"Your heart has a sense of justice, unlike my own."

"Akito?" Setsura mumbled, noticing something was strange. Indeed just as she thought that he lets go of her and took a few steps forward towards a large tree in the courtyard. Watching his back, she could not help but think how lonely he looked. Setsura took a few steps forward and buried his face in his back. "I apologize, do I sound insensitive?"

Her words did not consider Akito's job as a military police officer. How many lives has Akito taken with his own hands? How could she be so inconsiderate?

"This is your first time; your actions are normal. I was the same too, a long time ago. A heart of justice, feeling empathy for the victims...But now? Now I am nothing but a pathetic dog."