CH 36

Translated by: Abo Dammen

Editor: Miha 

Proofreader: Abo Dammen 

Warning: mentions of dubcon/nonconsensual sex 

“Ah!” The previously closed eyes fluttered open. Numerous spasms erupted throughout Bai Tang’s limbs.

The bedsheets were all messed up. He balled himself into a fetal position and pleaded for mercy absentmindedly, “Don’t… don’t hit me, I was wrong…”

With time, the sounds of struggle faded into the night, leaving behind only the quiet sound of very cautious breathing.

He had another nightmare.

It might be because of his upcoming heat. Every night for two days in a row, he was jolted awake by nightmares, the content of which was always the same: snippets of misery he had endured during his previous estrus.

“Oh, please…” Bai Tang clung to his knees, shaking with cold perspiration. “Stop dreaming about it…”

—— 

The excavator, not far away, was carefully managing the scraper’s up and down motion. Bai Tang stared out the window, his gaze unfocused. His mind was drifting towards the skies.

So why is the alpha looking at the published proposal for omegas? Could it be…?

“Bai Tang.”

Could it be that he wanted to learn more about the regulations of the country? Or was it to deal with those who advocated for omegas…

“Bai Tang, Bai Tang!”

His table was knocked a couple times. At that moment, Bai Tang snapped out of it. The students at the next table looked worriedly. “Bai Tang, the teacher was calling you to get up and answer the question…”

“Ah!” Bai Tang sprang to his feet and nearly knocked his chair over. “I-I’m sorry.”

—— 

“I heard you weren’t paying attention in class today?” The two tables were placed face to face. Zheng Ruyun forked a carrot and placed it in his mouth. “Teacher Fang was upset.”

Ever since that conversation, Bai Tang had brought his mini lunch box to the office every day in the hopes of finding Zheng Ruyun for lunch.

Bai Tang’s glass lunch box included a modest portion of meat and a significant portion of veggies. Jiang Yunshu’s new housekeeper made it. He massaged his brow. “I was preoccupied…”

Zheng Ruyun had a rough understanding of what Bai Tang had experienced. He sprang up and pulled Bai Tang’s collar to see whether he was hurt. “What happened? Did that pea-brain hit you again?!”

“Rb, cb.” Djl Kjcu gfvvfcfv jcv tf delmxis mbnfgfv tlr mtfra. “P rjk atf olif tf qijmfv bc atf ajyif sfrafgvjs. Pa kjr jybea atf bwfuj qgbafmalbc jma…”

Zheng Ruyun sulked, hating iron for not turning into steel, the same look he had four years ago. “So what? Maybe he was just trying to trick you. He’s done all this to you, and you still believe him?!”

“Rb, P vbc’a…”

Djl Kjcu klcmfv, ecregf tbk ab fzqgfrr tlwrfio. “P’w pera rqfjxlcu bypfmalnfis… Lfs, Eesec, tbk vb sbe fzqijlc atf gfmbnfgs ogbw j revvfc ygjlc vfjat?”

“Dunno.” In a terrible mood, Zheng Ruyun puffed and rubbed Bai Tang’s face. “It’s neither of our business. You do realise he’s already died, yeah? Forget that. Right now, all you have to focus on is studying hard and gaining admission to a reputable university to achieve mental and financial autonomy. Okay, hun? If you run into any problems, we will do everything we can to support you.”

Bai Tang pouted. “I know…”

After eating, Zheng Ruyun headed to a teachers meeting, leaving Bai Tang alone in the office to help tidy up students’ papers.

As if by magic, the same incident that happened yesterday did so again. The pheromone surged crazily through his body, causing him to quickly cover his mouth and force all the whimpering down his throat.

Bai Tang crept beneath the table. His body temperature progressively increased, and he was unable to gather any strength. His eyelids were wet, and his fingers trembled as he extracted the inhibitor from his school uniform coat. He almost lost his grip numerous times.

He ignored the position and force, and stabbed his arm with all the strength he could manage.

The stinging sensation came next. He couldn’t hold the syringe any longer, and it fell to the marble slab with a clack, which was especially sudden in the quiet office.

Bai Tang only prayed that no one would come to the office yet.

After waiting in fear for a while, the inhibitor’s effects finally worked, and his scalding body slowly cooled down. He staggered out from under the table, and felt a chill in his pants.

Bai Tang bit his lip, opened all the windows in the office to ventilate, and quickly went to the bathroom.

He looked at his underwear and felt a fit of embarrassment. He cut a sorry figure. In the end, he had to pad the ground with some paper towels.

—— 

“Bai Tang,” Zheng Ruyun knocked on the bathroom stall. “Are you in here?”

“Yes, i-it’s me.” Bai Tang opened the stall to let Zheng Ruyun in, then unbuttoned his coat and lowered his collar to reveal his nape. “…Thank you, Ruyun.”

Zheng Ruyun squatted halfway; upon seeing the myriad scars on Bai Tang’s glands, he exploded with rage, “Fuck. That motherfucker, I’m going to kill him!”

Bai Tang squeezed Zheng Ruyun’s arm, as if to comfort him.

Zheng Ruyun took deep breaths. As he patched on the new pheromone blocker, he felt a little disoriented and didn’t dare to apply any force. It was truly a horrific sight. He couldn’t even imagine how painful it had been for Bai Tang.

“Fuck, don’t let me catch sight of him, or I will certainly, ABSOLUTELY dig his grave.”

On the other side, Jiang Yunshu was having a weekly routine call with Zhou Zhaoyu. “Professor Zhou, I’d like to ask how Bai Tang’s situation is?”

There was little to no improvement in Bai Tang’s mental state despite months of therapy. Zhou Zhaoyu was business-like, “It’s nearly stabilised. There should be no major issues as long as there is no unexpected stimulation and no triggers are seen.”

“I understand,” said Jiang Yunshu. “Professor Zhou, I want to ask, does Bai Tang suffer from severe insomnia or anxiety?”

“He used to a year ago,” Zhou Zhaoyu stated. “Now he just experiences it occasionally.”

Jiang Yunshu frowned. “Is it to the extent that he has to take sleeping pills?”

“Did you find sleeping pills at home?” Zhou Zhaoyu asked.

Jiang Yunshu, “Yes.”

“At that extent, physical methods can indeed alleviate his problem,” said Zhou Zhaoyu. “But in addition to the medicine for cold, fever and acute gastroenteritis, Bai Tang hasn’t taken any medicine for three months. That’s all I can say.”

“Alright, thank you. For Saturday’s book fair, have you guys decided how you’ll go there?” asked Jiang Yunshu.

Zhou Zhaoyu, “We haven’t yet.”

“7. Replace estazolam tablets with vitamin B tablets” Jiang Yunshu wrote in the tomorrow section of his journal. “I’ll send Bai Tang there then. I would have to trouble you to send him the address.”

“Mhm.”

After hanging up, Jiang Yunshu used his index and thumb to make the first stroke of the character. The medical kit contained all household medications. Why hide it if he wasn’t using it?

What was Bai Tang intending to do with the estazolam?

—— 

Jiang Yunshu always sniffed a faint whiff of sweetness the entire journey home. And yet, it also didn’t appear to be anywhere. He remained silently at the entrance, watching Heitang chase Bai Tang upstairs.

Bai Tang asked Heitang to hurry inside in a low voice. After making sure Jiang Yunsu wasn’t following him, he then closed the door.

“Shh, good boy, Heitang.” Bai Tang rubbed the sweat on his temples and made a shushing gesture with his finger. “Don’t make any noise.”

His hands shook slightly. It took Bai Tang many attempts to insert the key into the keyhole and unlock the cabinet. He retrieved the sleeping pill bottle from its hiding place, removed three tablets, and placed them in a tiny biscuit tin, before grinding them with the thermos’s base.

On his nape, two layers of pheromone blocker patches were attached, and the flesh buried behind the scarf was pinkish. His heat was close, either today, tomorrow, or the next day.

Going into heat is terrifying… Bai Tang’s fingers, which were gripping the thermos cup, turned white. Whenever his heat started, he would lose his sanity and identity completely. His body would be unable to exert any strength, making him incapable to resist anything.

He would let out a whimper, then he’d whine and wriggle and rub like a dog, his tears and saliva spilling and glittering on the ground as he begged the alpha to touch him. Because it hurt so much, and that he felt even worse about himself during this time, Jiang Yunsu became even more unscrupulous.

He’d let forth a scream so terrifying and so joyful that blood and white matter would spurt from the same orifice.

So disgusting, so disgusting… Bai Tang’s breath carried a tremble, and he recited as if hypnotizing himself, “Don’t think about it…don’t think about it, don’t think about it…”

Jiang Yunshu waited for a long time on the sofa with the notion on his head before he saw Bai Tang go down the stairs. He put his phone down and stood up, trying his best to soften his tone, “Bai Tang, let’s talk.”

“O-Okay,” Bai Tang entered the kitchen and removed a cup from the sterilized cabinet. “I’ll go get a drink first, do you…want to drink?”

Jiang Yunshu became alert right away. The last time Bai Tang had taken the effort to ask him something was when he wanted to see whether he was allergic. But then he chided himself in private for harboring irrational views and misinterpreting others’ goodwill as a scheme. If Bai Tang knew what he was thinking, his heart would surely run cold.

Jiang Yunshu, “Okay, thank you.”

Bai Tang breathed a sigh of relief, and from his peripheral vision, he saw Jiang Yunshu’s back facing him again. After much fumbling about and a quick shift of expression, he mixed the powdered sleeping tablets with water.

Jiang Yunshu received it and saw that there were only a few gulpfuls of water. He drank it without any care, and then asked, “Has something happened recently?”

“…Nothing.”

It’s only right to keep his guard up. If he had let go of the past in just half a year and trusted Jiang Yunsu wholeheartedly again, then Bai Tang would be an idiot.

Jiang Yunshu reminded him, “If you feel any discomfort in your body, remember to come to me. I won’t hurt you.”

Author’s Feed:

Jiang Yunshu: I’m the idiot.  

Translator’s Feed:

Hhhh you got drugged, bro  The entire comment section on changpei was laughing at yunshu’s stupid ass lol. It’s lunch break so I’m posting this. No uploads next week because it’s when the conference will officially start.

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