Chapter 202

The palm hanging at the trouser leg is clenched into a half fist. Li Yan, who is used to seeing big waves, needs to breathe in and out three times to stabilize himself. He says almost every word: "do you still love me?"

If there is a gust of wind coming through my chest and bumping into my heart, my "never stop" in my mouth is finally replaced by "what do you think?"

I think that's the answer I should have.

It's rare that Li Yan can reach a consensus with me without my help. From now on, he won't talk about his feelings with me any more. I'll reveal to him again. How can he get a leisurely relief.

At that time, in the cave of Aotai, even though my consciousness was vague, Li Yan's words, like knife carving, stayed in my heart.

What a sad thing is that I used to be afraid of his lack of love. At that time, I was scared of his deep feeling.

He has paid for his frivolity, which is almost the price of his life. Even if he has hurt me and failed me, I would like him to let him go.

And I didn't answer definitely that I don't love, that's a little bit of selfishness I keep.

After I escaped from death, I realized how fragile life is. I can't guess which one will come first, tomorrow or accident. I think I should stick to the last stance and draw a wide-ranging rest for this relationship.

Li Yan, he is smart.

If I want to distinguish the men I've known over the years by their intelligence quotient, Li Yan's intelligence is far superior to any of them. He has a very keen sense of smell and touch, and he has amazing penetrating power. Even if he has been stupid because of his emotional intelligence, his intelligence quotient has never been defeated.

Just a few seconds later, Li Yan recovered from the state of being thoughtful. With an embarrassed smile, he tried to liven up the atmosphere: "let's eat. I'm afraid it will be cold soon."

Still can not eat any taste, but I taste one by one, I pretended to sincerely: "are very delicious."

Looking at Li Yan's smiling face, I stopped my chopsticks and said, "Li Yan, Wanjia is operating very well. It's still a place where so many people live. Unless it can't continue to operate, you don't have to choose Wanjia for the promise you made to me. It's not necessary. You and I are both adults. I think we should advocate fair and orderly competition. "

After scooping up a bowl of soup and putting it in front of me, Li Yan's vision gradually drifted away: "OK, listen to you."

After that, we were silent throughout the meal.

After I put down my chopsticks, the dishes on the whole table seemed untouched.

He didn't persuade me to eat more. Li Yan took the fresh-keeping film, wrapped it up plate by plate, and put it in the refrigerator neatly.

Looking at his sparse figure, I hesitated for a moment and said, "Li Yan, you don't belong here. Such a small space, such an old community, this. You know what I mean

"I understand. We'll move on the weekend. "

The body is stiff, Li Yan half ring just turns around, his voice some obstruct not smooth: "understand, I understand."

Suddenly, I don't know how to take over.

Standing up, I changed the subject and said, "or I'll help you wash the dishes before you leave."

Busy turn back, Li Yan's hand plate is there to block: "no, I'll do it, you don't do it full of oil."

If there is another feast, it will come to an end.

I automatically regard Li Yan's words as an obscure order.

Repressing the light coolness of the river flowing in my heart, my group rubbed hands: "OK, thank you for your hospitality. I'm leaving."

With his mouth open, Li Yan made some difficult moves in his words: "Chen Shi, you wait."

I stopped and said, "what's the matter?"

Two hands intertwined, Li Yan buried his face, even did not dare to look at my eyes: "there will be a chance, I mean there will be a chance, one day you can meet the man who can take you out of the past, you decide to go ashore with him to live a decent life, you send me an invitation, OK, I want to give you some money."

My heart seemed to be blocked by what I had just eaten. This blocked my breathing. I stretched out my hand and said, "give me a goodbye hug."

No, Li Yan retreated as fast as he could to avoid the flood. He retreated to the dining table. He was blocked, so he had to stop. His voice was a little harsh: "No. Goodbye. "

Restraining the tide, I pretended to take back my hand as if nothing had happened: "Oh, then I'll go."

Li Yan stood in the same place, motionless.

Deeply coagulated him for a few seconds, I took back my sight and walked slowly step by step. I didn't know what I was contradicting and what I was expecting. However, in the end, I failed to find a proper outlet for all my contradictory expectations.

Until I walked out of the door and gently brought it to the door, Li Yan didn't make any more noise from the beginning to the end. He was like a wooden pile, quiet and without any sense of existence.

I came home with red eyes.

When I took a bath, I was steamed by the steaming water mist, and the pain that I deliberately solidified could flow freely. Tears became the epitaph of pain, and fell on the ground and made many holes.I lost sleep all night, and my mind was dragged by the past. I thought of that morning full of dawn, the sunrise on the tip of Meisha was magnificent and magnificent. That day I said Li Yan, I feel I love you more and more, and he answered a word.

I and his ending, as early as that day was written in the past, yellow and white, but I need to crawl all the way away from the vagabond, mixed with sorrow and joy, to be able to reach out and touch the truth that still makes me tearful.

The next day, I took some ice to cover my eyes. I put on a make-up that was several times thicker than usual. I went back to Tianjian as if nothing had happened to me and continued my life.

In the evening, I went to Bao'an to see Chen Yihe according to my appointment with Dai Xiaohong.

After taking the medicine, Chen Yihe's in a much better state. He can eat, drink and joke, so I feel relieved.

I'm back to the days and nights of fighting for money.

More than a month later, Wu Haian asked me to have a snack. She gave me the latest news. Zhang Shichi, Lu Xiaoran and Wang qiufei were sentenced to nine years' imprisonment for several additional charges. Lu Xiaoran was followed by seven years. Wang qiufei was sentenced to one year for turning into a tainted witness to identify Zhang Shichi's corruption.

When she was drunk, Wu Haian gathered her hair. She jumped out of the hot topic and opened a new way: "Chen Shi, since we have all become good friends, the past transactions should not be counted. All the restrictions I gave you before are not counted. You can choose how you want to communicate with Li Chun. I'm open. It's not mine. I don't have to fight. I I don't want to have something to do with Li Chun in my life. I'll go back to find a man who likes me, and I'll have a good experience of being chased by a man and licking the dog. It's not good to be chased by men. Why should I spend my youth on Li Chun? He's not worth it. It's really not worth it. "

After grabbing the wine jar in Wu Hai'an's hand, I glared at her: "you've drunk too much."

Wu Haian reached out to retrieve the wine jar. She raised her head to her mouth and poured a big mouthful: "I'll tell you the truth, on Tomb Sweeping Day, I went back to my hometown. I met my former high school alumni. He chased me in high school, but I didn't pay attention to him. I met him this time when I went home. Ah, he has grown up and he knows how to dress. I talked with him again and felt that he would be much more mature than he was in high school. We added wechat to each other. These days, he sent me flowers every three to five. It's a bunch of roses, just like the one Li Chun gave you several years ago. It's very fresh and fragrant. I hold it a little bit. I began to compare. Over the past few years, I have been carrying the name of Li Chun's girlfriend, but I still can't get a piece of grass from him. Because I'm his nominal girlfriend, I don't have only pursuers. I'm breaking away from his shadow now, and I'm not getting flowers right away. I think I'm also in the red. I'm just like a Taoist for Li Chun. Why do I have to hold him so hard? Besides, if I pull harder, he won't really belong to me. "

Although I got together with Wu Haian many times, she would drag the topic to Li Chun nine times out of ten, no matter whether she drank or not. But this is the only time I heard from Wu Haian's tone that she was tired and wanted to give up the struggle on the eve.

How to say well, even if I repeatedly think that Li Chun may not be a reliable man, I think Wu Haian is mature and wise. She knows what she wants and doesn't want. Even if I get familiar with her again, I still have a shallow connection with her. Moreover, because Wu Haian thinks that Li Chunzhong loves me again and again, my position is full of embarrassment, and I'm even more embarrassed It's not good to give advice.

It was just listening. I took a sip of wine and said, "well, you have to think about it."

As for my slightly sloppy interaction, Wu Haian took it over, and she gathered her hair together: "Chen Shi, so you say that I don't want to lose my youth on Li Chun. Why don't I struggle to find another way to live. Even if I can't have a relationship with this high school alumni, can't I go to the University Alumni again? No more. I'm looking for customers, suppliers and partners. Even if I go to zhenai.com and baihe.com to get married, it's better for me to do something practical than hang it on Li Chun. So I made up my mind that I would marry myself out before I was 33. Chen Shi, you should remember what I said. You should also supervise me when you look back. You should supervise me to find the dock and stop as soon as possible. I want a man who really belongs to me. I don't need to hold him in front of him. I can hug him, kiss him and love him. Li Chun is nothing but a prodigal son. He is nothing but a fart! I don't like him anymore. He's not even a fart in front of me! "

Wu Haian scolded so fiercely. I was entangled with alcohol and my brain was confused. I was easily influenced by her. I followed her to scold: "yes, yes, Li Chun is a fart!"

Suddenly, Wu Hai'an's eyes became red. First of all, her eyes were red all around her. She held her finger across it to block it. She blocked it or gave some strength. Her tears overflowed from her fingers: "Chen Shi, in fact, it's very sad to give up a person she loves very much. But when I look back in the past, I find that in the past, hesitating and carefully restraining their own feelings of the self, make me more sad. Over the years, I want to drink some wine for many times. I want to press Li Chun on the door and kiss him. I want to undress him. I want to take off my clothes for him. I want to lie on him. But I'm too strong. I don't want to be more arrogant than Li Chun. I want to save my self-esteem and self love Down to the dust in front of him. I'm too forward-looking, he's too many wild bees and butterflies, I'm too deep in love, and I'm more and more timid. He plays life with excessive love, and he and I have never been in the same world. I think, since I once sharpened my head and couldn't get into his world, I've been crying for it. Why should I entrust my feelings to an empty dream that can't get a response. I'm tired and have no courage. I'm still a virgin. I'm a 32 year old woman. I've lived for more than 30 years in vain. I've never tasted what it's like to be a serious man. I think if I die in an accident one day, I'll live in vain. So I have to give up Li Chun, I have to give up him.. I have to give up on him to find a new life... "After murmuring so much, Wu Haian is just like a drinking machine. She drinks all the wine in front of her, and she comes to grab my share. After she drinks too much, she has great strength. I'm afraid to drag and slander her, so she can only walk two cans.

After drinking all of them, Wu Haian got drunk more thoroughly. She took out her mobile phone and shook her head. She put her middle finger in the middle of her lips. Her eyes were blurred: "Chen Shi, hush, don't make a sound. Well, I'll call Li Chun, who is so mean. I'll scold him and relieve his anger. I'll curse him to death. "

I don't want to stop Wu Haian from doing this stupid thing at all.

After all, no matter what she said tonight, this is the conclusion she came to after careful consideration, or this is just her weak catharsis after being drunk, she should also take these strong emotions and collide with Li Chun. Even if the ending she got is still silent, she still needs to take this step.

Otherwise, let her bury these deep in her heart, forever and forever. Li Chun did not know that he had filled all the moonlight of Wu Hai'an from the beginning to the end. It was a massive and cruel fight for Wu Hai'an.

In my mind, Wu Haian has already dialed Li Chun's phone. She raises her eyes and looks at me with sparkling light. She is drunk and dimly turns on the hands-free. She holds her cell phone in her two hands and her mouth is buried in the phone. She raises her voice: "Li Chun, you asshole!"

There was silence for more than ten seconds. Li Chun's voice was mixed with light wrinkles: "what's your nerve?"

Thanks to the protection of alcohol, Wu Haian was not stung by Li Chun's words, which were like the point of a knife hitting the flesh. She held her mobile phone closer: "do you know why I don't want to sleep with you? Do you know why? Did you spend a minute or two thinking about why? Because I love you so much that I want to marry you, but you just want to fuck me! You're paralyzed, scum man, Slut man, asshole

Sitting on one side of me, some sad smack tongue.

Even if I became familiar with Wu Haian again, Wu Haian had a little success in front of me and said something rough, but this was the first time I heard such a natural social shake from her.

She's real. She's been depressed for a long time.

Holding my breath, I tried my best to desalinate myself as if I were not here. I waited silently for Li Chun's answer.

I didn't expect that Li Chun, an immortal who never let me down, once again shocked me with his strength!

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