Chapter 56

“Without asking the reason why.”

What followed after the question was not an answer, but another question. Patrizia replied immediately.

“If I ask why, will you tell me?”

“…”

“You will not.”

“… you will not understand.”

“That is something nobody would know. Because I have not heard it yet. I do not know the content, so of course, I cannot understand anything right now. How could I understand everything that happened that night, without knowing anything?”

“…”

“Your Majesty may not need it, but if you possibly desire my understanding, you must tell me the surrounding context. I do not even possess any psychic abilities, so unless you tell me, I will not understand until I die.”

But he probably wouldn’t tell her. Who was she to him, to provide an explanation? Perhaps if it was Rosemond. Patrizia did not expect anything. In the first place, the two of them did not share a close enough relationship to even have such expectations.

“Whether Your Majesty tells me the reason, or not, I do not care either way. As you know, for me to ask Your Majesty the reason, I do not love Your Majesty, nor do I have interest in Your Majesty.”

“…”

“But if you do tell me why, I will listen, and try to understand based on the situation. At the very least this relationship grants that much, ours that is.”

When she finished speaking, Patrizia momentarily saw the fear in his eyes. It wasn’t the fear he had towards her. More than that, it was far beyond… he was afraid of what had not happened yet.

What was he afraid of? Was he afraid she would not understand his frenzy? Or was he afraid that she might expose what had happened that night, the fact that the Emperor was a maniac? Patrizia opened her mouth without her knowledge and spoke.

“So, if you tell me or not, I am fine. What happened that day can just be buried, and that would be it. Also… I have no intention of spreading rumors about it, so you do not have to worry about that. The people around me are also not very light-mouthed. There will be no loss of the honor of the Imperial Family and Your Majesty.”

“…”

Patrizia had finished speaking, but he said nothing. He was probably taking his time to think, but it was a little frustrating because the answer did not come out immediately. However, she waited patiently. It was foolish to ask a scared young child for an answer right away. At least she had to wait until he was less scared. That was the way.

“Me… you will not be able to understand me.”

It was the same words as before, but she did not show any signs of exasperation and asked him.

“Is my understanding so important to Your Majesty?”

“… ”

“I may not understand Your Majesty. But that is it. I wonder if you really need to gain recognition from me. I am not the Lady Rosemond that Your Majesty loves so much.”

“…”

He stared at her with his slightly reddened eyes. Was he crying? She could only see his reddened eyes, and couldn’t really see the tears running down his cheeks. It would have been better if the moonlight had given off a handful of brightness. No, maybe this was better. Could they become more sincere by being draped in the darkness?

For a time, silence passed between the two of them, and soon Lucio’s shocking confession began.

“I am a murderer.”

The first sentence was already unusual.

To be honest, it was amazing that he wasn’t crazy right now. If he were a normal person, he would already have gone crazy. That was why he was a very tough guy. Even after dealing with such a death, he had calmly risen to the throne and ruled the Empire.

He was most definitely the firstborn son of the previous Emperor. But he wasn’t the “rightful” eldest son. His mother wasn’t the previous Emperor’s official wife.

His mother was a woman named Janet, the mistress of the Emperor. As the daughter of a poor family, she was lucky to have become the Emperor’s mistress after catching his attention one day while he had gone on a journey. Afterwards, she gave birth to a son but strangely continued to not be granted a title and position.

This was because the Emperor watched out for the family of the Empress, the Duchy of Oswin that nowadays did not show themselves, as the Duchy of Oswin was the only family that could exert tremendous influence within the Empire at the time. Currently, this influence was not being revealed because the Duke of Oswin, his uncle by law, was living in the castle of his manor, but the Oswin family had the power to shake up the Empire at any time if only desired.

Empress Alyssa, his mother by law, was a good woman. Of course, in his memory, she was a demon, nothing more and nothing less, but he had apparently heard that she was an extremely kind woman in the early days.

He did not believe in the theory that humans were born good. He also didn’t believe in the theory of humans being born evil. What he believed was human nature was neither good nor evil, and that their desire determined whether they became good or evil. It was possible for good and evil to sufficiently coexist.

Alyssa, as everyone had said, was a good woman at first. But as her beloved husband brought in a mistress, and that mistress gave birth to a child, she became more and more twisted. As the situation worsened, the feelings of goodness disappeared, and the feelings of evil that wouldn’t have been revealed came out and took over.

It was only a matter of time before the evil manifested and ate everything up. Even more so if one had no intention to control it.

Maybe the situation would have been better if she had a child to bring down her emotions. But she, unfortunately, had a body that could not bear children, so infertile, and when she learned of this, she became almost half crazy. It was basically a death sentence, that beyond anyone else, the official Empress could not give birth to a child with the person she loved.

The Empress who could not give birth to a child lost the point of her existence. Even if she was the Duke of Oswin’s daughter, this fact cannot be changed. Alyssa wished to live next to her beloved husband until she died.

Eventually, she adopted the mistress’ son due to her obsession. Naturally, Janet rejected this, but nobody would listen to a mere mistress that had not even been granted a title. Even more so, if the person giving orders was the daughter of the number 1 prestigious family in the Empire, and the supreme Empress of the country.

Eventually, she had no chance to resist, and her young son was taken away from her arms. At the time, nobody knew that up to that was okay.

It was hard, honestly, to love a child that wasn’t her own, and one that her beloved husband had with a lowly mistress. Regrettably, Alyssa was not kind enough to do such a good deed.

She was an extremely ordinary person, but grew up in a wealthy and loving environment, and therefore was a bit more relaxed, optimistic, and affectionate than others. So perhaps she accepted her misfortunes more tragically than others because of this.

The previous Emperor watched her raise him with distrustful eyes, but Alyssa confidently told the Emperor that she would raise him herself. However, Alyssa never raised him “well.” To say that was being raised ‘well’ was wrong.

She abused him. The locations for abuse varied, but it was mostly in Empress Palace, where Empress Alyssa stayed. The Empress Palace has become a painful place for him to revive the experiences of abuse. Her abuse went beyond mental and physical abuse, and she did not hesitate to speak brutal and obscene words, as well as personal attacks. It was amazing that he could properly grow up after hearing those words since he was young.

The beatings were close to everyday. In order to avoid the suspicion of the Emperor, she wounded only places that weren’t visible, and as a result, there were plenty of small and large wounds where the Emperor would never know about unless all the clothes were completely taken off.

As a child, he grew up in her hands from a very young age, so he barely knew about Janet’s existence, and he simply had no idea why his “real” mother—Alyssa, hated him so much. He did everything he could to get in his mother’s good graces, thinking as young children did, that it was him who had a problem, but all that returned was still violence.

His mother always called him a ‘dirty child’, and his young self, who did not fully understand the meaning of it, thought that it was a hygienic problem and even made a waste by bathing twice a day, and only realized that it was of no use and quit doing that a long time later.

He realized at exactly the age of 13 years old, that his mother would never love him, no matter what he did. Of course, the result of this enlightenment was only the mind and body that remained injured, after being relentlessly destroyed.

Originally, he had a lively and bright personality, but after 13 years of dealing with such treatment, the smile on his mouth had disappeared for a long time. If one was subjected to such abuse from a woman who was originally thought to be the birth mother, the chance of growing up as a normal and bright child was close to minimal. However, his spirit was so devastated at the time, that he could not even notice this change within him.

It was a desolate life almost near death, but nevertheless, it was a life that he still retained. Until ‘that’ happened.

The previous Emperor was a person who often went on punitive expeditions. The territory of the current Marvinus Empire was the result of his father, the previous Emperor, increasing the existing borders by 10 percent, which required conquests through war. The previous Emperor frequently emptied the Imperial Palace for war, and while he was away, the one in charge of the Imperial Palace naturally became the Empress.

Alyssa’s violence would get even stronger when the Emperor was away, a result that did not change, whether he got older or not. Already, he was too sick mentally to reject her violence, and he had become accustomed to receiving her abuse. It was as if a fully grown elephant accepted the shackles that it had struggled to cut off, as part of its own body. For Lucio himself, Empress Alyssa’s existence was like the shackle of an elephant’s foot.

Even when he had his 15th birthday, the previous Emperor continued to leave for wars of conquest and emptied the palace, which eventually resulted in an irreversible tragedy.