Chapter 57

10 years ago.

Lucio, who was then a prince, was a little excited about his 15th birthday. He was a young boy whose mind and body were beyond weakened, but nevertheless it was his birthday. He got up early and at the thought of celebrating his birthday.

There was nothing particularly different about his birthday. Maybe if the previous Emperor had been in the Imperial Palace, but he was now abroad for a conquest war. Since his mother would have nothing to do with holding a birthday party for him, so it was very likely to be just like any other day. He simply decided to be happy with the symbolism his birthday represented.

“Your Highness, Her Majesty, is looking for you.”

It was around the time of noon when it had started to rain little by little, that she called for him. He headed to the Empress Palace, thinking that he had to hurry before the rain gradually came down stronger. There was still some hope in his mind. Perhaps today… he might be given a gift instead of a beating today. Alas, the boy was still young, and he was not fully aware of the reality he was facing.

The small piece of hope amplified when he arrived at the Empress Palace, and the reason was because of Empress Alyssa, who welcomed him with a smile that was unlike her usual self. His mother always began ranting as soon as she saw him. However, at least today, she welcomed him with a smile. Hope was growing in his heart.

“Your Majesty.”

“Welcome, Prince. The weather is quite nice.”

He thought it was a little weird when he heard those words. It was difficult to say that the weather was good now, but his mother said it was nice. But Lucio soon stopped thinking. If his mother said it was a nice weather, then it was nice a weather. Perhaps his mother had said that because thanks to the rain, the air was clearer. He responded, after interpreting the words of Empress Alyssa at his discretion.

“Yes, Your Majesty. The weather is nice.”

“Is it the Prince’s day of birth today?”

At those words, young Lucio’s heart pounded. Ah, his mother remembered his birthday! Was she trying to give him a gift? He nodded his head quickly with an excited heart.

“Yes, Your Majesty.”

“That is why your mother has prepared a gift.”

She stood up from her seat with a pretentious smile. Lucio, who was quick to notice her nuances telling him to follow, and then followed after her. Despite the heavy rain, she did not hesitate and went out of the Empress Palace. The maids put an umbrella over her, and Lucio, who followed her out of the Empress Palace, also had a maid put an umbrella over him.

The rain, which had been weak even as he was reaching Empress Palace, was getting stronger. Lucio couldn’t bear his curiosity of what Empress Alyssa had prepared for the gift, but he feared she would retract the gift if he showed this, and simply followed after her.

Soon, Alyssa’s footsteps stopped, and the place they arrived at was one of the secluded carvings of the Imperial Palace. Lucio, who stopped, had a confused expression on his face. Was she perhaps giving this carving as a gift? It was a naive thought befitting a young child.

“What do you see, Lucio?”

His mother, who always called him ‘dirty child’, called him by his first name. He replied faithfully to his answer while feeling his heart pounding.

“Looks like a person, Your Majesty. Is that correct?”

“Yes, it is a person.”

It was a person. Surrounded by a white cloth, he couldn’t be sure of its shape, but it seemed like a person. When the guessed answer was correct, Lucio smiled. However, his expression was forced to crumble by Alyssa’s words, which were soon to follow.

“This is the person you will kill.”

“… what?”

Lucio looked at his mother with an expression of disbelief. However, Alyssa smiled elegantly, unlike a person who had just said such a thing to a child, and once again nailed down her adopted son.

“This is the person you will kill today, Lucio.”

“Your Majesty…”

“If you kill this person, I think I will be very happy, Lucio. Can you willingly do this for your mother?”

If it was something to make his mother happy, it was something that made him happy as well. But not this. To kill someone. He shook his head without his knowledge, and then Alyssa’s face, which had been smiling until now, quickly hardened. Lucio’s facial expression also hardened, as he watched her.

Ah, Her Majesty’s expression did not look good once again. He intuitively anticipated abuse. It was an anticipation due to repeated abuse, like the idea of “Pavlov’s dog.”

“Lucio.”

However, she didn’t beat him right away. Instead, she just called his name in the same voice as before. When his expectations changed, Lucio was flustered. He responded to her call in a slightly terrified voice.

“Yes, Your Majesty…”

“Are you trying to disobey my words?”

“Your Majesty, it is not that…”

“I have no need for excuses. You are truly a bad child.”

Bad child. The young Lucio shrank at those words. These were words he heard many times while he was beaten up. Bad child, dirty child, and vulgar child. Her assaults never stopped at just the physical. Alyssa knew this through experience. That what truly made a person sick was the wounds of the heart, not the wounds of the body.

And Alyssa was a woman who wanted to leave Lucio with many wounds, more than anyone else. The feelings of inferiority and jealousy she felt towards Janet, who possesses all that she could not have, and the hatred towards Lucio, who would inherit all of it and eventually rise to the throne. In fact, none of this was either Janet or Lucio’s fault, but she could not help it. Alyssa needed someone to take responsibility for her negative emotions, and it was not possible for it to be the powerful Emperor. So that was why it had to be the weak Janet and Lucio, as they were without power. She couldn’t dare do this to the Emperor of an empire after all.

“You cannot do what this mother wants. You are an invalid child.”

“… I am sorry, Your Majesty. However… killing some is…”

“No excuses are needed.”

The cold voice of Alyssa hit the young Lucio. Lucio bit his lips and stared quietly down. He usually tried to do everything Alyssa wanted. Otherwise, if he didn’t, the assault began immediately. But this really was wrong. To kill someone! It was something absolutely impossible that should not be done.

However, in Alyssa’s dictionary, there was no such thing as “absolutely impossible that should not be done”. She was an Empress of an empire, and now, without the Emperor, she was the Imperial Regent. She believed that there should be only one Emperor that didn’t do what she wanted. Otherwise, she would be so miserable. The Empress, who couldn’t earn any favor or power, was too insignificant.

“Child, when was the last time I picked up the beating stick?”

‘Pick up the beating stick’ was not a literal meaning, but a slang meaning and an indiscriminate assault onto Lucio. When Alyssa said those words, Lucio almost peed himself. Alas, even on his birthday day after all… was his mother trying to hit him? Why? Because he wouldn’t kill that person? The child’s thinking continued quickly, and the conclusion was this.

His mother was trying to hit him because he wouldn’t kill that person.

But that did not mean he could kill someone. He looked at his mother with a terrified face, and it was the child’s desperate struggle for mercy. If the young boy asked with such a sorrowful face, she could have shown a little mercy, but Alyssa did not. This was the only thing she had engraved on herself about him.

That child was not the son she painfully gave birth to.

“ACK!”

The beating began. Her assault motto had always been from ‘head to toe’. From the beginning was the head, and the end were the toes, one by one. Not just beating, but also sexual mockery. The brutality was so ugly and dirty that it was difficult to dare to speak about it. Nobody could think that a mother would dare do this to her child.

“SOB, AH-SOB!”

Lucio let out a distressed moan and protected himself by covering with his hands. His mother’s beating did not just cause physical pain. When someone known as his mother beat him, it shook the deep-rooted values of a child’s belief that “all mothers love their children.” Therefore, he constantly pondered and thought about why he should be abused by his mother, unlike other children.

And the results were always negative. Because children were so good, they were looking for the cause of this terrible abuse from themselves, the victims, not the abusers. Then, physical abuse did not only stop on the wound of the skin but also evoked deep feelings of self-destruction along with all other negative emotions.

All these series of procedures were difficult for even ordinary adults to endure, and a child who had not yet reached adulthood could not fully endure it. So Lucio was in the process of dying more and more.

“Your Majesty, Your Majesty… save me…”

While struggling to survive, he didn’t dare to call Alyssa, who he thought was his mother, as ‘Mother.’ Perhaps because he already knew that Alyssa terribly disliked him calling her as his mother. So he was constantly struggling and hoping to show her as much as possible, at least to gain her mercy.

Alyssa, however, was a woman without mercy. She had no interest in the pain of a young boy who was not even her child. What made her such a cruel and sadly sick villain? Was it the Emperor’s indifference really making her do so? Or was it her husband’s mistress and a child born out of wedlock?

Perhaps she was already used to this repeated form of corporal punishment. Just as Lucio had become accustomed to his mother’s punishments, so too had she been domesticated by the unjustified punishments. Without realizing that it was making her into a demon. Maybe even if she became a demon, it wouldn’t matter.

“This damn child! Who said it would kill you? Who do you take after, to be so foolish and stupid?!”

The wound that had not yet healed, and made not long ago, broke open again. He bit down on his lips due to the pain, and he cried small sobs. Still, he barely managed to think with his mind that was becoming faint.

His mother always beat him up and said words such as, ‘who do you take after, to be so foolish and stupid?’ However, the young Lucio did not understand his mother’s words. He was clearly the child of his father the Emperor, and his mother the Empress. Who did he take after if not those two? It was a question he could never understand without knowing the secret of his birth.

However, even the faint thread of thoughts became difficult to maintain as the beatings continued. Finally, he felt his mind fade. Being used to repetitive pain had never made it painless. Just like being continuously stabbed by a knife didn’t make the pain duller.

He was just enduring. At least, he didn’t die from the previous assaults, so he wouldn’t die this time as well. He protected himself by having such positive thoughts that were nearly pitiful. Anyways, this was because young Lucio still wanted to live.

But this time it went a little too far. Lucio, who was enduring Alyssa’s assault, had this thought momentarily.

‘If I kill that person, my mother should stop hitting me.’