Chapter 464 - Unrestraint Restraints

Irene was on the mind, my mind… now more than ever.

Deja vu, and suddenly I'm back in that dinky motel again, back in that rundown room. I still remembered the weight of her body, the almost suffocating sensation pressing hard against mine.

If I concentrate, I could still almost hear the soft, low allure in her voice. I close my eyes, and hers would be staring back, shimmering, glinting that dangerous look of red.

Suffice it to say, inebriated Irene was a terrifying force to be reckoned with. 

If that time had just stayed an isolated incident, a one-off event that I could look back on, fondly reminiscent, perhaps giving a little chuckle thinking how amusing the whole thing was actually - I would have been fine with that.

I mean really, what were the chances something as bizarre as that would ever repeat itself twice, right?

It's starting to feel like every time I think I had everything sorted out all well and fine, fucking life just chimes in and pulls the goddamn rug from right under me, and every time my jaw came smacking down onto floorboards, I just never seem to learn… and in this case…

"Master..." Her voice, so close, like a tickle in the breeze, soft music to my ears, the faint chuckle, the giddy murmur. "Tighter?" 

Her arms slowly began to slither and stir again, around my abdomen I felt them, like a pair of snakes - love-starved, affectionate snakes - ensnaring its victim, rendering them helpless. I felt her breath even more now, a chilling warmth trickling my nape, and her long, snowy-white locks draping down over my shoulder… leaving me to wonder…

"Were you asking me or telling me?" 

"Why, asking, of course, silly, silly, Master," She cooed, and I could feel her lips speak and move on my back. "Of course, I would never dare act first, unless I first hear your say and desire." 

And then she clung to me even tighter than before. 

"After all, what kind of Servant would I be should I act only on my impulse?"

Right…

The thin fabric, the soft pressure… it was at that exact precise second, I came upon the fact that Ash does not in fact wear a bra… whether I was willing to know or not.

Still, I tried my absolute best to ignore it, to keep going on about my business, focus - my arms outstretched, my palms wide and open - I continued pouring my efforts to dismantling the barrier, to not much success, unfortunately….

The thing was, a clear focus was the focal point to executing magic, and right then, with a dangerously adorable Ash hugging my back like some kind of elf-koala hybrid, can you really blame me for being just a tincy-wince bit distracted? 

Then there's those pair of eyes peering right at me through the kitchen window, can almost see the smug satisfaction on shimmering inside if I squint hard enough… y'know, I never knew my mother much of a prankster before any of this, and if this is just her way of playing wingman, can someone please just fucking clip her wings already before she flies me too close to the sun?

"How about a brief moment to collect yourself, Master?" Ash suggested, her sultry emerald gaze peeking at me from the corner of my eyes. "Surely you must be strained… and oh, how my heart aches having to bear witness to your constant struggles, I simply cannot stand it and I sorely wish to assuage your agony in any way I am able." 

One half spoke in a slur, the other half too breathy to be even considered words, it's amazing she's even managing to keep her fancy way of speech. 

"Take a break, huh?" Briefly, I diverted my focus to her love-glazed eyes. "What would you suggest?" 

She smiled at me, and she giggled, and the sound of her whimsical silly giddy giggle implied possibilities - endless, tempting possibilities. 

"I've always dreamt to feel you rest yourself upon me, to be the source of your comfort and peace, and to have you rest your head atop my lap, to stroke you, to tend to you, to see your content face staring back up at me… would truly be a tremendous bliss like no other." 

Once again, I just have to wonder.

"Bliss for you, or bliss for me?" 

Ash leaned against me further, the surface of her lips grazing the tip of my ear, as she spoke, coy, "Can't it be both?"

Okay, I'm into this right now. Like, I really can't lie, cute is my kryptonite, and Ash had two, glowing green and tender directed right at my sight. Without her reserves, without her discipline, all that was left of her was a big giant lump of unrestrained emotion. 

And boy was it gushing….

"Mmm, I dunno," I mused, forcing down the urge to smile. "Seems pretty irresponsible to take a break so soon after starting." 

"Aww…" She aww'ed, disappointed, sad, her frown and the arch of her brow looking up at me, clinging onto hope still. "I… I understand, Master. But, perhaps soon, perchance? Later? Sometime? Next time? Please?" 

Oh, was that crack I just heard? Hold on, let me check… ah yeah, thought as much… my heart's in a million billion pieces now. 

"Not to worry, we'll have plenty of chances," I assured her. "Soon, later, sometime, and next time." 

Just like that, her dazzling smile reemerged, reassembling the pieces of my heart and sending it into a flutter. Ash proceeded to snuggle on my back again, her brazen happiness sounding in a pleasing hum.

"I'm so happy I love you," She said, now seemingly spouting just whatever comes to her mind. "Master, are you happy too?" 

"Very happy, Ash, yes," I responded, indulging her. 

"How happy?" 

"Extremely happy." 

She made a strange sound. "Mmm, that is a rather broad and vague measure of your happiness, Master. I am unable to gather a precise estimation," then, she lifted herself, pouting. "And that is simply unacceptable! Master, I must know." 

"Uh, huh, right," I nodded, pretending to understand. "And what do you want me to do about it?"

"Be more precise. Much more. Very much more! This information is crucial! As your Servant, your happiness is my priority! You must be happy! You will be happy!"

Is she telling me or commanding me? I don't even know.

"Precise, huh?" I snickered. "Well, I can get a measuring flask for you, but I don't think there's a millimeter to happiness conversion system here just yet."

That only made her pout even more. "This is not a jesting matter, Master! Your happiness is at great risk!"

"Yes, I'm sure it is…" 

"No matter what, we must find a way to gauge your happiness, otherwise I will never really know just how happy I'll be able to make you," Her arms latched onto me tighter. "And I truly want to make you the happiest you can be." 

My arms lowered too. I couldn't focus, it was straight-up impossible to even want to. My eyes couldn't help but be lost in every inch of her fair, white complexion, and so when it came to focus, Ash just took it all, stole it, swiped it all for herself… and I don't think she meant to. 

I felt my hand move of its own volition, and I felt the warmth of her cheeks on my fingers. 

"If you really, really want to gauge how happy I am," I said, slowly shifting my body until we were face-to-face. "Then, how about a demonstration?" 

She tilted her head, her lips frowning clueless. "Demonstration?"

I closed our distance, inch by inch, until her eyes could only stare and mirror mine, the tips of our noses touching, and her soft, supple lips and my own, grazing… 

"Ah, no, y-you mustn't!" Ash quickly darted her head away from mine, her gaze wide, and with a meek expression burning red. "W-We mustn't, Master! No, no, no, no! No! W-We can't!"

She was swaying as she spoke. Drifting tipsy left and right, while flashing me a reproving, reproachful look. 

"Distractions, Master! Your resolve must hold firm! My feelings cannot interfere with your endeavor! No! It is not right! I solemnly vowed to keep my feelings buried until you've succeeded! That is… that is the right way, indeed!"

I was… bemused, luckily, I have plenty of experience speaking to the inebriated. Call it a skill. 

"And kissing you, touching you, will - what, break my resolve?"

"No!" She snapped, jutting her head forward as she did. "Instead, it will break my own! A single kiss, and no doubt, my resolve will crumble. I will not be able to resist. I will wish, crave, desire for more! I will want you more! Your touch, your warmth, your love… I will continue to want it more and more! And you!" She poked me with her finger. "You, being the loving, benevolent Master I love so, so much, will only choose to adhere himself to my wants, my desires! Because he is so loving and benevolent! And, above all, that must not happen no matter what the cost!" 

When she was done rambling, slurring, she took a gasp, forgetting to breathe, before she stumbled, and I caught her, slowly resting us on the dirt, as she slumped her head again against my chest.

"And that is why… Master," She said, ending her tangent with a feeble whisper. "I must keep my feelings for you… unspoken, unacted upon for now… no matter… what…"

So that's why she's been so awfully twitchy lately, that, plus being in her more 'affectionate season', it must have been a struggle. I'm surprised she was still holding herself back given her current condition. 

And all this time, I thought I was the one here resisting my carnal desires… Ash has gotten me beat by a mile.

"I'm doing… good, aren't I, Master?" She murmured, stuffing her face into my shirt. "I'm not… distracting you, am I?" 

Well, I don't know about the 'unspoken' part, but…

"You're doing a very good job," I said, giving her head a brief, gentle stroke. "Very good."

"Mmm," She made another sound. "How good exactly?" 

Oh, here we go again…