Chapter 2194

"Kowtow."

"Kowtow."

The sound of knocking on the door rings in the quiet early morning. There seems to be some problems with a lamp at the end of the corridor, flickering and flickering. You can hear the burning sound of the filament, which further sets off the emptiness and lengthiness of the whole corridor. These old buildings with a long history can always smell a little old and dilapidated, and they don't know where the air outlet comes from, Make the air cool.

"Pop."

The lamp at the end of the corridor didn't hold on to the end, so it went out. The brightly lit corridor was a little dim. Although the other lights were still bright, it inevitably gave birth to a sense that the light was gradually dissipating, and the surroundings became more and more quiet.

Matthew couldn't help but look up and look at the extinguished lamp. He could vaguely see that a moth was lying lifeless in the lampshade without any movement. He tried to explain the meaning of moth fighting fire. Then, both sides died together. It made Matthew's eyelids start to beat somehow.

"Kowtow."

Matthew took his eyes back and knocked on the door again. He didn't get any response. He looked down at the gap under the door. The light leaked out. It was quiet and peaceful, but it didn't go out.

Matthew didn't hesitate any more. He tried the door handle, but found that the door wasn't locked. So he pushed the door open directly, "blue Li?" The narrow room was clear at a glance, with no one. Scripts and pages were scattered on the desk, and an empty coffee cup was placed next to it.

Matthew's heart began to sink.

Open the toilet, no one; Open the balcony, no one. The whole room was so big that there was no one to hide, which allowed Matthew to be sure that lanli was not there.

After looking around for a week, Matthew noticed something unusual: in the ashtray on the coffee table, there was a cigarette that had not been lit but had been abandoned; There are no cigarette packs and lighters nearby.

Matthew guessed a little. He left the room quickly, didn't forget to take the door, and then walked up to the roof of the top floor.

Push open the rooftop door, the dark night sky will spread out in front of you, and the faintly rolling mountains will appear in the sky like the ink color. However, a few strokes will outline a touch of magnificence and magnificence. Even if there are no stars in the sky, my heart will suddenly open up.

In the boundless night, a figure is sitting on the edge of the balcony. The wind blows his shirt and clothes. It seems that he may take advantage of the wind at any time.

Matthew let out a long breath, which made him feel a little relieved.

Every time lanli needs to be quiet and think, he will always find a noisy and quiet corner to sit down. In the past, he always chose the supermarket. If he can't find lanli, he can always find it in the corner of the supermarket; But with the popularity and recognition of lanli gradually rising, the supermarket has become less "safe", which also means that lanli has to find other harbors.

They are now trapped in the small town of SNIM. Compared with the forest, the roof is a more convenient choice, and should be the only reasonable choice. As a result, Matthew quickly came to the rooftop and saw the familiar figure. In an instant, there was an illusion in his mind, the dislocation of time and space. It seemed that when he came back to Eton school again, he saw the other side of Lan Li on the rooftop.

That kind of loneliness, that kind of loneliness, that kind of fragility... Usually, it is always precipitated in the shallow smile between the eyebrows. Almost no one can detect it, but it is always objective and lingering. It's like a drowning person who is calling for help without making a sound. The silent roar hides the gradually suffocating ashes. Slowly Slowly devouring the weak and bright light around the soul.

Last year, after the "pop drummer" was killed, the accompanying gloom seems to have finally disappeared, completely disappeared. Even when Paul Walker was in a car accident, there was no recurrence, just like Langley finally got rid of the nightmare, but now, the shadow is quietly emerging again.

Matthew's steps quickly came forward, but when he was about to approach, he could not help slowing down: he was a little flustered, for fear that his steps would disturb lanli, but he did not expect that lanli's joking voice came from the wind, "don't worry, I don't have the courage to jump down, I just need to be calm."

At this time, Matthew couldn't laugh at the joke. But the footstep is still solid again and landed on the ground, then also sat down beside Lan Li.

"Many people say that those who commit suicide are the weak, because they are too afraid and too timid, so they choose to kill one hundred people; But I have different ideas, in fact, they are brave, because they have the courage to make a decisive Farewell - completely turn around. The courage they have is far beyond imagination. "

Blue Li's voice was wavering in the wind, which made Matthew a little worried. His eyelids beat more and more.

"The courage she has is something I will never have." Lan Li said in a low voice.

Matthew knows who this "she" is. "You know that's wrong."

Lan Li didn't affirm or deny it. He just looked up at the starry sky and said, "don't worry. Really, I'm just tired from reading the script. I need a cigarette to wake up. I'm just... Oh, I'm just tired. " There was a cigarette and lighter in his left hand. There was a cigarette in his right hand, but it didn't light. His tired voice was full of self mockery.

"The night in Ireland is really beautiful. I can't help imagining that I can run freely and wantonly on the top of the forest barefoot, just like my soul can fly." Lan Li took a deep breath, the fresh and cold air filled his chest, the whole person seemed to be a lot lighter, "Oh, if time stops forever, it's a wonderful thing."

"... Langley, you need to rest." Matthew said in a deep voice.

Lanli pauses for a moment and laughs happily. "Ha, I know that I have a rest every day, but I have to work overtime because I have too much work to do. Otherwise, the filming progress of the crew will stop. Believe me, Eugene will never have a good face."

"Lenley, I'm serious." Matthew didn't buy it. "The crew didn't have so much work, you know, I know. You are deceiving yourself

Lan Li's smile stopped at the corner of his mouth, and his expression was slightly stiff.

Matthew couldn't bear it, and his tone slowed down a little bit. "Lanli, you need to rest. You're in a bad state, very bad. You'll collapse at any time. You... You need a good sleep, you need to cheer yourself up... You haven't closed your eyes for three days, it's not normal. You're... Very, very tired now, and a little bit of an accident is possible... Listen, you need to rest, you just need to rest. "

"I know!" Blue Li rudely interrupted Matthew's words, "I will, I will rest. I'll go back and revise the script, and I'll have a rest. "

That perfunctory words made Matthew tough again, "Langley, I'm serious. You're in a terrible state now! You should be rational enough and smart enough to know the consequences of this... "

"Yes, I know it, I know it all!" Blue Li turned his head and stared at Matthew fiercely. His voice became hard and cold, and he burst out a strong momentum. "I know all about it, but I know the consequences, but I still advised her to go to the front line. I know what may happen, but I still didn't stop her. It's me, you understand? it's me! I always pretend that I'm smart, that I know everything wisely, that I'm God, and that I'm in charge of other people's lives, but in fact, I don't know anything. I really don't know anything. "

Matthew opened his mouth slightly. "Blue Li, it's not your fault..."

"Then whose fault is it? Tell me, I should blame me! Charles, should I blame me? If it's not me, who is it? You told me that if I couldn't blame someone, I might go crazy, you know? I have to do this, I have to divert my attention. " Blue Li's bloodshot eyes were full of anger and despair, staring at Matthew in the dark, one after another.

Matthew couldn't answer.

"Do you know? I can't do it, I can't close my eyes, I can't stop thinking, as long as there's a little space, I'll start to imagine what's going on there! What's happening to her now! What is she facing now! Even if she's still alive, she's in a bad situation, isn't she? How could she be better? As long as I close my eyes, I'll see her covered in blood. I can't, Charles. I really can't

Lan Li's words are fragmented, the kind of deep into the bone marrow wound, blood dripping to show his vulnerability and pain. After tearing off the mask, it's exposed like this.

"I know, I'm a coward. I just hide in the crew, pretending that the world is peaceful, pretending that nothing is crazy, and paralyzing my nerves with my work! But she is struggling on the line of life and death! How ridiculous! How ridiculous! But what's even sadder is that I can't help anything, you know? I can't... I can't help it... I can't think about her, but I can't help thinking about her... I don't know what to do. "

"I have to be busy and keep my brain going. I can't have a little rest; I have to blame someone and let my anger out, otherwise I'm not sure what I'm going to do. I... I can't stop, okay? I can't stop. It's like... I don't know, it's like stopping, everything will collapse, everything I insist on, everything I try to do will collapse! "

"Heather is a disease, Paul is an accident. What about Edith? Edith, it's me. It's me who made it. I can see the blood on my hands. Do you understand? I hate my own reason, and I hate my own intelligence. In fact, I'm just a big fool. "

"Charles, what should I do?"

Blue Li's despairing eyes looked at Matthew like this, which broke his heart completely - he couldn't help, he couldn't help at all.