Chapter 69: no forgiveness

Philip von Heist, cousin of empress Catherine, from the neighbourhood empire. He was here in my past life too.

But since I was banned from entering Cassius chamber around the time in my last life, I never got the chance to meet him, but I had heard a lot about him.

He would not stay here for long anyway. As far as I remembered, he had joined the office for only one month, before he was kicked out. He was accused of treachery. Though the final verdict was in support of him, he had lost the trust of all the nobles.

So he was forced to leave the empire. Even his sister had to suffer a lot. She was often be seen with suspicious eyes in the public. Rossland had also taken its benefit and insulted her badly. Poor man, look how confident and happy he was looking.

But I didn't know the details to help him, only that a few proofs were found against him, which proves that he had done treason.

"Are you alright, Duchess?" asked Charles and only then did I realise I was staring at Phillip without blinking and had still not replied to his wordings.

"Oh, I am alright, your majesty. And it would be my honour to help you, your royal highness." I replaced both of them and then closed my eyes.

How idiotic would I have been looking, staring at him.

I heard footsteps and saw Killian coming back to me with a royal physician. 

"Shall I escort you to your chamber, your highness," he asked and I smiled.

Didn't he use mother when he saw me in pain, why can't the calm and collected Killian do so.

"Thank you, Killian." I held his hands, his grip was so gentle as if I was made of wax.

"I apologise, your majesty, his royal highness, I need to go and rest." 

"It's alright, go and take rest duchess." I nodded, but before I could walk away the emperor added, "oh, by the way, I never thought a duchess would look good in the knight's uniform."

I must say that his majesty was best at coating threats and insults in sugary complements. What a manipulating and calculative person. But I was shameless too.

"Thank you, your majesty. I would make sure to hold this uniform's honour." and wear it more when you are around.

His eyes showed surprise, hearing my reply and then he chuckled. It was twice that he indicated to me to apologise and I just ignored it. But then again, I did not find myself in the wrong.

As I passed through, I saw Cassius standing up to join the men. Our eyes met and he had some confusion in his eyes but I ignored it. I walked past him without giving him another glance.

"Marianne" my legs halted once I heard him calling me because this was the first time after our marriage that his voice didn't sound cold and distant. He sounded like the time when I had met him.

But in the next second my expressions hardened and I continued walking, completely ignoring him.

My all maids waked behind me with hurried footsteps.

Once we reached my chamber, Killian forced me to lay on the bed instead of sitting in the parlour with him.

"How are you feeling now, your highness?" he added in a concerned voice.

"I am much better now, you don't need to worry, Killian '' I assured him but was still looking sceptical.

"But I am upset that I could not win against you and complete the deal," I replied, making a pout.

"It's alright, you were going to win if your father had not intervened. So we will take you as the winner," he replied and I smiled like a baby, I was sure there were a thousand stars in my eyes.

He laughed, "alright, tell me what I need to do, I have never hosted any party since my coming of age ceremony is not done" he replied and I nodded.

"Don't worry, Killian. We would be a perfect match for hosting." I replied, ruffling his hairs, his ears turned red and I laughed more. But then I winced, my neck started paining again.

His expressions also turned serious. "I am sorry, your highness. It's all because of me. Father was worried that I would be hurt, that's why he intervened. And then you know how his anger influences him sometimes. 

But I told him that it was just a bet, and we were having a friendly match. He had realised his mistake" he continued explaining to me but how could I explain to him that it was not his fault.

For some reason, Cassius had always hated me, but he was not like that before our marriage, before Elizabeth and his parents died.

He must have loved his wife a lot, but that gave him no right to hurt me all the time. So even if he wanted to apologise now, there was no forgiveness in my heart.

"Are you feeling bad for me Killian?" I asked to change the topic and he nodded.

"Then, give me an honest reply to a question, as an apology," I demanded.

His brows furrowed in confusion but he hooded,

"You can ask me anything, even without conditions, your highness" he replied, but no I was sure, he would not tell me the truth normally, otherwise I would not have used my wounds to do emotional blackmail on a small child.

"Why do you not call me mother all the time Killian, you always switch to his highness," I asked and his brows furrowed.

"Killian?"

"Killian?" 

I waited for his reply but nothing came out. I called him many times, but he didn't reply. He was lost in his own world.

But his eyes were speaking a lot. I could see a myriad of emotions passing in them, I wondered what a child had faced to see so much pain and emotions on his face.