Nothing has made my day more
than receiving your letter. Its
true you \u0026 I have been married
for 7 years, although a good
man is a far cry from what
you've been.
I watch my soaps so much
because they drown out your
constant whining \u0026 griping
Too bad that didn't work.
I DID notice when you got a
haircut last week, but the 1st
the thing that came to mind was
'You look just like a girl!' since
my mother raised me not to say
anything if you can't say
something nice, I didn't
comment.
And when you cooked my
favorite meal, you must have
gotten me confused with MY
SISTER, because I stopped
eating pork 7 years ago.
About those new silk boxers: I
turned away from you because
the 49.99 price tag was still on
them, \u0026 I prayed it was a
coincidence that my sister had
just borrowed $50 from me that
morning.
After all of this, I still loved you
\u0026 felt we could work it out. So
when I hit the lotto for 10
million dollars, I quit my job \u0026
bought us 2 tickets to jamaica
But when I got home you were
gone.
Everything happens for a
reason, I guess. I hope you
have the fulfilling life you
always wanted.
My lawyer said that the letter
you wrote ensures you won't
get a dime from me. SO take
care.
Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As
Hell \u0026 Free!
P.S. I don't know if I ever told
you this, but my sister Carla
was born Carl. I hope that's not
a problem