Chapter 51 - A Recurring Nightmare For 23 Years

"Come here. I need your body tonight," he said, and she froze. 

Her mind momentarily short-circuited as her eyes fixed on his hand, patting the bed. Did she hear what he just said correctly? There was nothing to think she hard otherwise.

Lewis studied the horror on her face, which made him smile subtly. He knew he was being aggressive, but he needed to try.

"I had a terrible nightmare," He said under his breath. "If cuddling is still a little too soon for you, do you mind lending me your ears?"

He must have lost his mind saying those, but it just escaped naturally from his mouth. It wouldn't be that bad if he told her a thing or two about him, right?

Devon pursed her lips, scrutinizing the gentleness flickering in his eyes, and she nodded. She walked towards the bed and sat down, discreetly making a safe distance between them. He had noticed it but said nothing about it.

Once her back rested against the bed's headboard, Lewis gazed at his hands. Where should he start, he wondered, now that she was all ears.

"In that nightmare, I was around seven. I was in the rear seat of the car, staring outside. The sky is clear and everything just looks perfect for a family outing." A subtle smile appeared on his lips, but his eyes glinted with bitterness. 

Devon furrowed her brows as his tone sounded so melancholic. He said nightmare, but the way he described it sounded more like a beautiful dream.

"Then, I heard a woman's gentle voice from my side. It was my mom, smiling, as she bribed me with candy. I heard my dad driving, complaining how my mother spoils me." Lewis tilted his head back and closed his eyes, stabilizing his breathing as he could still remember that memory vividly.

It felt as if it just happened yesterday. A memory that kept flashing in his mind every single time he closed his eyes and eventually became a recurring nightmare he could never escape.

"I couldn't explain how it feels, to hear them banter like usual, their waves of laughter, and just how the atmosphere the car has. Until…" Lewis winced as his head throbbed, clutching the sheet tightly.

He thought he could confide in her, tell her about the origins of his sleeping problem, and so they could be more open with each other. But now that he was doing it, he couldn't.

His tongue kept rolling back and his body shaking. This wasn't a secret about his life, but he never, not even once, told anyone about the experience of that day.

Lewis flinched and opened his eyes when he felt something warm on his hand. 

"You don't have to force yourself," Devon reassured softly, staring into his eyes with a subtle smile. "You don't have to say it."

His fear and trauma, Devon could understand with just the way his body trembled. She knew he was trying his best to open up, even though it could open the deepest scars in his heart.

A sigh of relief slipped past his lips before he shook his head. "It's alright."

Devon just smiled and remained silent, waiting for him to continue once he was ready.

"It should be a family outing, that turns into tragedy." Lewis exhaled heavily as he stroke her fingers with his thumb. 

"That day, I lost the two people I held dearly. Everything happened so fast, I wished I didn't blink that day. Maybe if I didn't, I wouldn't open my eyes just to witness how life slipped away from my mother's eyes after protecting me from harm."

It was an accident that shook the business world. The death of the then-current CEO of the Qin Empire and his wife. Both died on the spot, while their son inflicted grave injuries.

It was said that Lewis survived because her mother protected him while a metal bar plunged into her neck. Lewis had witnessed it all, opening his eyes just to be showered with his mother's blood dripping down on him.

The sight of it was gruesome, too much for a child or even for an adult to witness. Because of that, he spent his youth recuperating from physical and mental trauma. 

Although he recovered, Lewis was never the same. He wasn't the cheerful little boy who would smile on little things (even on huge matters). Instead, he had matured too quickly.

But even despite that, that memory from 23 years ago haunted him every time he closed his eyes. It terrified him, draining him. But no one knew that.

All they knew was a cruel and workaholic tyrant who flips the table whenever he was displeased. Not that he wanted sympathy. He just wanted to break away from that shackle, because he didn't want to remember his gentle and warm mother like that.

She was more than that last image of her. His mother was kind, gentle, and a wonderful person.

"I'm not saying this to you so we can cuddle or that you feel unnecessary sympathy towards me." Lewis let out a deep sigh, as he couldn't believe he told her about it. "I'm saying this because I thought I need to…"

He trailed off when Devon suddenly sprawled her arms around him and pulled him into her embrace. For a moment, Lewis froze, stunned while she trembled.

"My friend…!" Devon bawled, as if she experienced it herself. 

Lewis had always portrayed himself as someone who wouldn't budge at anything, but for him to suffer alone all these years felt like a direct stab in her heart. Her tears weren't from sympathy, it was simply because it hurt.

"Don't worry, I'm here now." Devon declared in between her sobs while rubbing his back. "You can stay like this for as long as you want. I won't say a word… not now, not ever."

His eyes softened as he buried his face in her shoulder. It was amusing how his words earlier sounded so comforting being uttered by her lips.

"Mhmm."