Chapter 62 - 61. Uncommitted

Glen looked at Connor's shoulders which were shaking slightly and he felt utterly helpless. Around them, the wind had died down, but that didn't stop the cold from breaking through the layers of the human's clothing. Connor lowered his head to the ground and the movement caused his hair to fall forward, covering his face.

The back of his coat was starting to get wet from the falling snowflakes which were immediately absorbed by the thick fabric. Glen knew they couldn't stay like this for long, but he couldn't bring himself to go to the agent to comfort him.

This sight of a fragile Connor, other than his cheerful and annoying self, awakened a painful memory for him. The memory of an event that had left them both with an indelible scar. A memory he wished to bury even though he knew they could never forget it. Glen couldn't stand the image of this Connor standing in front of him. He wasn't used to seeing him crumble or even be in a mood other than his usual sassy temper. He clenched his fists and gritted his teeth. 

His childhood friend was a tough man with a cheerful character that was never forced. He had little memory of the man showing him any signs of weakness.

Provocative and insolent, Connor was of a nature to always push others under the spotlight. At the same time, this curiosity and habit of getting involved in everyone's businesses was his way of bonding and reaching out to others. It could be annoying when you didn't know him, but the lack of mischief in his intentions meant that once the ice was broken there were few people who could resist his charms and his eternal good humor.

Glen stepped forward and erased the distance between him and the officer who continued to sniffle softly. His heart clenched every time he heard the noise. He pushed his feelings into a corner and softly called his friend.

"Hey, you have no reason to be in this state."

"Let me be. I just got dumped, okay? " The light-brown-haired man said annoyingly. He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a handkerchief in which he blew his nose loudly.

"You hasn't been dumped."

"He asked if he could erase my mark! That's the same! He doesn't want my mark. " The man was more and more restless. He started kicking in the snow with his shoes to vent then, turned to face Glen, his eyes still wet, but anger had taken over his other emotions.

"I didn't do it on purpose because I just found out that I'm not exactly a normal human being so I don't care but, do you know how many times he proposed to me? For at least the past two years, he's been bringing it back to the table whenever he gets the chance. Now that we have an even more definitive equivalent, than a scribble on a piece of paper and an unnecessary ceremony, he freaks out and wants to step back? What the hell? What were all the proposals for? Did he already plan to get a divorce or what? "

"If you don't care then why are you…"

With a glare, Connor made the werewolf feel that he had better not venture onto this ground. The man knew he was inconsistent. No need to let him know. Glen realized that he was going to have to maneuver smartly if he wanted to appease his friend whose emotions were starting to run over the place. And he'll have to do it by squeezing some common sense into his brain, which empties of its neurons as soon as it comes to his lover.

"He doesn't want…"

"Don't side with him!" Connor hissed as he cut him off. The alpha couldn't help a sigh as the agent's eyes were shooting daggers bigger than some of the tree branches around them.

"Look, I think you're reacting in a bit of a dramatic and emotional way. I know it's a little hard to believe but it's just a misunderstanding. Once you've spoken with… "

"Dramatic?" Connor scoffed and repeated incredulously.

"Yes, right now you're the worst drama queen I've ever seen and a real pain in the ass." Glen paused at the agent's dumbfounded expression and sighed again.

If he has to calm things out, he might as well take the opportunity to say what he was thinking. Glen didn't want Connor to do or say something he was going to regret later. And given the state of anger the man was in, it was only a matter of seconds before he made a hasty decision and jeopardized his relationship on mere guesses.

"Truthfully, I also think you have no right to blame Greg for his reaction and his question even though, I repeat, it is just a misunderstanding."

"And why exactly shouldn't I blame him? He made me believe he was ready to commit and the second he is faced with what he covets, he asks if there is a way to undo it. "

"And you?" The alpha looked at his flinch friend at the question he hadn't seen coming. "I have been watching you since the very beginning so, tell me, Connor. Have you ever given him some hope that you are committed to him and to your relationship? "

"I never cheated on him!" The man defended himself, offended.

"I am not talking about loyalty but commitment. You can't blame him for his question because, even though I know you're loyal, you're keeping him at bay, Connor. "

"What are you talking about?"

"Greg wasn't looking to see if he could erase the mark. He wanted to know if you could decide to take it away from him. "

Silence greeted the sentence Glen had just said. The man opened his mouth but no words came out and he stood staring at Glen. The snow continued to fall gently.

"You refused him several times when he asked you to live together. Now, I know you only accepted because he forced your hand, but I bet you already had a way out, right? The proof is that you accepted the position of Bloodhood liaison officer without blinking your eyes and without consulting him even if you know his lab is based across the country. "

The agent's eyelashes fluttered as he realized what his friend was trying to tell him.

"You mean that…"

"I mean, after years of tirelessly chasing you, never getting any encouragement, knowing that you had marked him as your life partner was a shock to Greg. And as pleasant as this shock was, he's so used to seeing you run away, that he wanted to know if he could trust that mark or if you were going to slip away once again at the first opportunity. "

"I…" The man looked helpless. Strands of his light brown hair were tangled in his eyelashes and he waved them away, unable to think of what to say. He lowered his head and the confusion could be seen on his face.

"So you still think you're right or…"

"No, I'm wrong. I'm an annoying and emotional asshat. "

"I never said you were annoying."

"This isn't the part you were supposed to deny." Connor punched the werewolf's arm in a playful manner and silence fell once again.

"Am I such a bad boyfriend?" He asked after a moment and Glen chuckled.

"I wouldn't say a bad one, but obviously you have a lot of room to improve."

"Ugh!" Connor put his head in his hands and rubbed his hair vigorously to rid it of the flakes that froze it in uneven strands. "Are you really sure he didn't ditch me? Because after what you told me, I realize that in his place I would have thrown me away without any qualms. No. Throwing away wouldn't be enough of the scum I was. Arg! "

Glen burst out laughing.

"Don't be too hard on yourself."

"I was upset but. If he was really gone I wouldn't have held him back. I mean, after what I've just learned, I don't know if it's a good idea to be together. He didn't reject me, but maybe he should. This is what any person with a minimum survival instinct would do. "

"I think it's not up to you to choose and I speak from experience. I did exactly the same trying to decide for my mate and in the end ... "

"Yeah, yeah, now you're a useless alpha happily wagging his tail whenever his mate is around, I got it and it's disgusting, but still. He is a civilian and I'm ... a wizard with weird and unknown shapeshifting abilities. Oh, and my clan would want him dead so I can marry and have babies with a witch when the thought of seeing a vagina causes me cold sweat." He shuddered at the thought. "My life is a mess. "

"True. What about we go and tidy it up then? For both of our sakes?"