Chapter 42 - First Step

"Hey, Zeng ge, want to move in together?"

Zeng choked on the soup he was drinking for dinner. Yul panicked and immediately went to his side, rubbing his back and handing him a glass of water. Zeng drank it in slow gulps and Yul sat beside him, pulling his chair closer.

"I- oh… Wow, it's so out of the blue," Zeng said, placing down the glass. It was so like Yul to be this straightforward. It had been a few days that Zeng had reciprocated his feelings but Yul wanted to spend more time with Zeng because even a few hours without any physical or virtual presence of him were unbearable.

"Sorry. It came out all of a sudden. But I have been thinking about it for a while and today, it just slipped up." Yul shrugged. Then his relaxed expression hardened, "Do you not want to? Did I mess this up?"

"Relax," Zeng touched his arm. "It was just too sudden, that's all."

Yul seemed to relax at that. He hummed, "Well, since we already spent so much time together, many of the things are here, you stay over often and … and I like it better when you are here." He took Zeng's hand in his own and said in all honesty, "I would love to be with you as your partner, Zeng ge. Please move in with me." He said so softly that one couldn't reject.

Zeng blinked at him. He really couldn't get used to how this bug guy blushed at anything related to him. He was too cute to say no to.

"So…" Yul trailed off, unable to stand the suspense.

Zeng smiled as he nodded, squeezing his hand, "Officer Wang Yul, I would love to move in with you."

"Yes!!!" Yul yelled and lifted Zeng from the chair and hoisted him up in the air, turning around in circles making Zeng yelp in surprise.

When Zeng was put down, he had to catch his head to stop it from spinning any further. Upon gaining stability, he slapped Yul on the chest, who just grinned back at him before kissing him on the lips.

Zeng had something to clear up before, "I have my first lead surgery in 3 days. I'll move in only after that is put behind."

Yul understood his need, "Okay. By the way, are you prepared? How are you feeling?"

Zeng looked peeved, "I don't know. I mean, I have practised a lot but those were general surgeries under controlled conditions and most importantly, pre-planned. In Emergency and Casualties Ward, it's all mayhem. I have assisted quite a few surgeries in there but leading one is a bit unnerving."

"Your seniors will be there with you right?" Yul asked. Zeng hummed. "Yeah, my senior Dr Jiang will be there to assist me during the first few times. If anything happens, he'll immediately take over."

He sighed. He was nervous, no matter how hard he practised. Under his senior's guidance, he had performed his fair share of surgeries but leading one of them… that was different. A life would be in his hands and if he messed up, it would cost the patient's life.

Zeng would think of it over and over again but nothing would make him feel better. He was frowning when he felt hands wrapped around his waist and a head resting against his shoulders.

"You have that serious look on your face again," he mumbled.

"I am just a bit nervous," Zeng replied and said after a long pause, "What if I mess up? It'll be disastrous."

Yul turned him around to face him, "Don't say that. I know you have worked so hard for this. You have studied and practised for years. It's your dream, Zeng ge. I trust you to make it successful."

Zeng felt relieved with the confidence his boyfriend had in him. "Thank you."

The next day, Zeng had gotten up rather early. He once again revised everything that he needed to know. He looked through several case files and studied them. He made breakfast and sat at the dining table, without touching his plate, revising the medical treatment, surgical procedures and drugs given during any particular complications.

He didn't know what the case would be. Many cases in the emergency wards would come without informing beforehand from the site of casualty. Some didn't even use the ambulance and would directly come to the hospital without any prior notice. These cases were the worst since there was no proper history or the exact diagnosis and often it's too late for them. Some cases would come with a brief call beforehand and would inform everything when the ambulance was set to go to the hospital. These were comparatively easier to manage most of the time if they are not extremely severe.

Zeng hoped it would go well. He didn't know what to do if it wouldn't.

Yul woke up at his designated time and came for breakfast. He saw Zeng frowning at himself and extremely tense. He shook his head in dismay. No matter how much he reassured him, the doctor would never stop worrying. That's how Xiao Zeng was.

The police officer sat beside him. "Good morning," he said, kissing him on the forehead. Zeng returned the greeting but with a grim tone. Yul saw the untouched food and practically forced Zeng to eat and made him finish the entire thing because well, as Zeng himself had told him, you must have a sufficient reservoir of energy before diving into any task. One couldn't work on an empty stomach.

Yul tried to boost his esteem till he was ready to leave for the job. "You can do it, Zeng ge!" He said, pumping his fists, "Jiayou!"

Zeng sighed but smiled anyway. "Thank you."

"Text me when you are done," Yul said and Zeng hummed after they shared a brief kiss in which Yul made sure to convey his trust to the doubtful man.

"Do your best, Dr Xiao," Yul said, leaning against the door frame. Zeng was a bit more confident by now, "Yes, Sir!" Zeng did a small salute, causing them to laugh a little, the tension dissolving around him.. He would sure try his very best.