Chapter 14: Man vs Bomb

Chapter 14: Man vs Bomb

The battle for the garden ended with a decisive loyalist victory.

The rebels nearly overwhelmed Basil and his allies through sheer numbers, until Bugsy returned from his woodcutting excursion. The centimagma decimated the left tomato wing with his fiery breath, allowing Basil to collapse the pumpkin cavalry's right flank. They cut the rebels down to the last sprout.

When Basil lowered his hoe at last, a harvest of fresh and crispy vegetables lay at his feet. Only five plant loyalists kept their heads; one individual for each breed sowed today, from the ghostie pumpkin to the demon tomato.

Your party earned 4000 EXP (320 for you).

The experience penalty was starting to show. Basil had slain the equivalent of a goblin army with no new level to show for it.

Well, that was unexpected. Basil checked his half-full bag of fertilizer. They had enough of it left to seed a second plot of land, but he wondered if it would be worth the risk.

It must have been a ploy of the Vegan Empire, Boss! Bugsy glared at the vegetable loyalists with suspicion. The Major Chicken marathon night influenced him a bit too much. Theyre infiltrators sent to turn us into herbivores!

The plant monsters cowered in fear of the much larger centimagma. Rosemarine protectively moved between them and Bugsy. They are good seeds! she declared with motherly pride. I wont let you hurt them!

Aww, she looked so brave snapping her fangs at a much larger monster!

Shes correct, Bugsy. Basil patted the centimagma on the back. They fought to preserve our meat dictatorship over the menu. As promised, I shall water them every day and spare them from the kitchen knife.

The five plant monsters let out screeches of happiness, but none as loud as Rosemarine.

If you say so, Boss, Bugsy said without complaining. So uh, do they join the party too?

I never close the door to new minions, Basil replied. However, he failed to add the newly born plant monsters to his party.

Registration attempt failed. An active party can only have six members. If you want to expand your organization or create interlocked parties, you must create a guild by conquering a dungeon.

Six members? With Shellgirl now included in the active party, that left only one spot. He could add and expel the vegetables from his party in short succession to grant them the extra Tamer Perk, but they would miss out on the improved stat growths.

Mister? Rosemarine asked in confusion. Is something wrong?

Change of plans, Basil replied. The System wont allow me to recruit everyone into my party, so they will form one of their own under your supervision, Rosemarine. Theyll be your interns and you will teach them our way of life.

Yes, Mister! Rosemarine took the smaller vegetable monsters in her vines like a mother hen. I will raise them to eat the meat of our enemies!

Hey, why does she get interns? Bugsy complained with clear jealousy. Mr. Plato and I are the seniors!

Speaking of Plato, the cat rushed out of the woods and towards the garden. Basil knew his pets body language enough to realize something terrible happened.

Basil, weve got a probl Plato froze upon noticing the new vegetable monsters. Am I hallucinating, or does that tomato have fangs?

When we all evolve, we will eat the goblins to extinction! Rosemarine boasted, the plant monsters making noises of approval. Basil suddenly realized that they lacked the intelligence to actually speak, at least until they gained a few more levels.

Boss, will meat dishes attack us too? Bugsy asked with a worried tone.

They shouldnt, Basil replied, although he suddenly experienced a moment of doubt. With the System, anything could happen. He brushed off the subject before he could tempt fate any further. Plato, whats happening?

The robots. Plato sat on the gardens grass, a serious expression on his face. Theyre patrolling the forest.

A tense silence fell upon the garden and Basil realized that he would never find peace. How many? he asked. How far?

A gearsman and five watchers. Plato gathered his breath. Theyre checking every spot of land, but the bogs terrain slows down their progress. Id say we have a few hours.

Youre sure theyre after us?

Who else, Basil? Plato replied ruefully.

Had Basil misread the situation? He thought the Unity lacked the numbers to patrol areas beyond Daxs riverbank and that his party could safely stick to the wilderness. Or did the robots mistake Basils group for enemy reinforcements? In this scenario, it made sense for them to secure the forest and prevent a pincer attack.

Basil cursed his rotten luck for letting himself be seen in Dax. He shouldnt have overreached.

What do we do, Boss? Bugsy asked, his antennae applied to the ground. I dont sense them yet so we have time to flee.

We cant run this time, Basil replied. We must destroy them before they can find the house.

Hello? Plato put a paw on his chest, right where Megabug once stabbed him. Last time we fought someone with a level higher than ours, I lost a life. I would rather keep the other eight.

I would rather avoid unnecessary fights too, but the situation is fundamentally different, Basil pointed out. We didnt expect Megabug so numbers and initiative were our only advantage. Today we have time to prepare, we know the terrain, and the robots dont expect an ambush.

Would it be enough to make up for the level disparity? What other options did Basil have available? He could make Molotov cocktails from his gasoline reserves or craft bombs from the leftover gunpowder Ren stockpiled for his rifle, but how could he deliver the payload without blowing himself up?

A brilliant, terrific idea suddenly crossed Basils mind. He glanced at Rosemarine, the adorable plant fretting at her owners attention. Mister? Why are you looking at me like you want to eat me?

Could you show me your cute little decoy Perk again?

Rosemarine nodded and duplicated herself, a perfect copy of herself appearing at her left. The double wore its own version of the pink ribbon, which turned to pollen dust the moment Basil attempted to take it off.

Rosemarines decoy could duplicate the equipment she wore before activating her ability, but the fakes disappeared when no longer in contact with her body. Basil took it in stride.

Okay, I have a plan. Basil started giving orders to the party. Plato, Bugsy, you keep us informed on the robots movement. Hopefully, Shellgirl will return in a few hours to reinforce us. Rosemarine, you drill the vegetables for battle. Im going to craft you something in the meantime.

A necklace, Mister? she asked.

Better. Basil grinned wickedly. A shiny belt.

New crafting recipes: [Molotov Cocktail] & [Explosive Belt].Quest: They called me Mad! completed!Your party earned 100 Bonus EXP (20 for you) and you learned the Athanor alchemy recipe.Your vegetables formed a separate party: House Garden.Party Leader: Ghostie Pumpkin.

Only the song of insects and the faint noise of snakes slithering in the grass broke the woods quietness. The party moved stealthily. Bugsy had grown comfortable enough with his new body to walk without shattering trees.

Unnerved by the silence, Shellgirl muttered words to herself. Shellgirl Incorporated Sea Commerce Enterprises?

Still trying to find a party name? Plato whispered. If the cat felt comfortable talking, then the watchers were still somewhat far away.

How about Shellgirl marked a short pause, as if suddenly inspired. Shell?

Already taken, Basil replied with a shudder. And its not a good brand at all.

La Bande Basil? Plato suggested with an amused tone.

Taken too, with an e at the end. Basil suddenly wondered if copyrights and trademarks still mattered in a post-apocalyptic world. He would avoid treading on the big business shoes, just in case they returned to power.

The Axes of Heaven, Mister? Rosemarine suggested. Aww, she remembered Basil had used that term!

Too violent, Shellgirl vetoed the proposal. Customers will take us for weapon merchants instead of a future worldwide consortium.

How about Platos Perfection? Plato said. The Plato Connection? Lets be honest with ourselves, Im the teams mascot, the bands face.

Cats arent market juggernaut material, Shellgirl replied.

Tell that to Garfield.

Basil glanced at the only member of the team who hadnt offered a suggestion yet. Bugsy? Any ideas?

I, uh Bugsy cleared his throat, his eyes blinking in short succession. Clearly, he was afraid of a negative reaction. The Bohens?

Basil immediately loved the suggestion. It was new, innovative, and powerful!

Uh, it sounds like a sitcom show. As usual, Plato answered this genius proposal with skepticism. Why, Bugsy?

Well, were living in the Boss house for free. That makes us the Bohens, no? Bugsys eyes widened with hope. Like a family!

Good boy. Basil patted Bugsy on the back of the head, which the centimagma liked very much. His antennae wriggled in pleasure.

I didnt know you kissed asses for a living, Shellgirl said without a hint of sarcasm. Does it pay well?

If Mister Who-Feeds-Me likes it, then I like it too, Rosemarine chirped. I will eat anyone who makes Mister unhappy.

Shellgirl swiftly voted for the proposal. I love the family-friendly company branding.

Looks like youre outvoted, Plato. Basil glanced down at his cat. Do you feel the pull of democracy?

The cat sighed in despair. We are going to die before we can regret the name anyway.

Your party name has been changed to: The Bohens.

Bugsy tensed up. Boss...

Basil didnt need a warning. His eyes noticed crushed branches along the trail and his ears picked up the sound of splashing waters. The group crawled in the tall grass, Bugsy included, to the border of the woodland path.

The trees stopped where the heart of the bog began. A thick tangle of reeds formed the frontier between the forest and a sodden, marshland clearing. Muddy ground surrounding a large pool of water and the gearsman examining it.

The machine that forced Basils party to flee Dax stood on the mud shore, one of its tentacles wading through putrid waters. It found the remains of a spinotters skeleton and pulled it out of the pool. Five watchers scanned the bones. They lost interest in seconds and floated around the gearsman as it continued its examination.

The sunlight briefly broke through the clouds above the bog and reflected on the mighty robots shielding. It dwarfed Bugsy in size, and Shellgirls barrels looked like toys compared to its cannon. Wow, said the latter with a fearful voice. Level thirteen?

Not so brave now, huh? Plato whispered. He watched the robot pull corpses from the pool in confusion. Do they think we have an underwater base?

I could build one, Shellgirl said. To stash our gold.

Shush, they will hear us. Basil opened his bag and brought out the explosive belt. Bugsy, put Shellgirl aside in the grass where she can take a shot unseen.

Plato looked at the explosive belt with concern. Basil, when I said I had eight lives left

Its not for you, Basil attached the suicide bandolier around Rosemarines neck and Bugsy quietly dropped Shellgirl in the grass. Rosemarine, use your seed decoy.

Yes, Mister. The plant duplicated, suicide belt included. How do I look, Mister?

Like the cutest suicide bomber ever. Basil handed Rosemarine his lighter. Bugsy, at my signal youll throw the duplicate at the gearsman. Shellgirl will provide cover fire and the rest of us will act as frontliners. Rosemarine, you will set your clones fuse alight before Bugsy throws it and create a new one as soon as

Basils mouth went dry. The gearsman pulled a metal piece out of the pool, the paint nearly intact in spite of the acidic waters.

A helicopter's tail rotor.

CRASH SITE CONFIRMED! The gearsman tossed the vehicle part back into the pool. Its steel tentacles tensed in alarm. SEARCHING FOR SURVIVORS!

They werent looking for us, Basil realized. The watchers immediately dispersed in all corners of the clearing, all of them on high alert. One flew straight towards the partys location.

Damn it! Basil hissed. Bugsy, throw the double now!

The watcher noticed the movement in the tall grass and unleashed a strident sound. The screeching made Basil wince and immediately caused the gearsman to turn its cannon in the groups direction.

With the element of surprise wasted, Basil jumped out of the grass and roared into the fray.