CH 1

I’ve encountered several unpleasant situations and incidents in my life. Whenever I did, I suffered a little, but I always had the drive to overcome it, and I felt like I was about to lose this time. It was because certain outcomes were unchangeable…to put it simply, D-180. Even though there was a minor difference, I continued on my way.

***

The light streaming in through the windows was so bright that Hajin couldn’t help but open his eyes. He glanced at the unusual ceiling, ornamented with strange designs, with weary eyes before opening his mouth to yawn. His body was rigid all over since the aftereffect of the move was still protesting.

The laughter of the local youngsters, which was obstructed by the glass, entered the room because the window was half-open. Hajin craned his head and spread his arms in front of him, opening the door next to his languid body. The light collected in a circle in the center of the room, as if it had witnessed something frightening.

“It’s nice that it’s calming…”

Hajin was up to “nothing” a lot of the time in his life. No matter how hard he tried, the amount of luxuries he could count on his fingers that were suddenly showered upon him was odd.

Hajin fetched the bread and blueberry jam from the fridge and made a quick breakfast before settling into the rocking chair by the window. When Hajin was younger, he saw movies in which a woman sat in a similar chair like that, knitting and warming herself by the fireplace, and he recognized why. It was good to feel his entire body shaking in warmth from head to toe. It was unfortunate that there was no fireplace, but the strong sunlight, which was bright enough to make anyone blink, was not too unpleasant.

Hajin was 31 years old at the time. He passed the employment exams at the age of 29 and worked hard for only two years. Nonetheless, he might well have done it all himself and did not consider it a lazy life. He was diagnosed with stage 4 stomach cancer as a result of it. Hajin closed his eyes and caressed his tummy skin, breaking into a dejected smile. He was at a loss for what to do.

Bang Bang. Bang Bang Bang. Bang Bang Bang Bang. 

When Hajin’s pressed-down eyelids became heavier, he heard the sound of a rude knock on the door. Hajin’s body curled up like a surprised cat, and his nose furrowed. There was a person who would be moving in the other unoccupied room among the two empty rooms, and he was expected to arrive today. It was most likely him.

“Hello-”

“Open the door quickly. The heat is going to kill me.”

As soon as the door was unlocked, it swung open. Hajin was not given the opportunity to speak with the man he saw for the first time that day, and instead stared at him blankly.

The man appeared to be 190 cm tall and dressed in a black tee, and sweat drops were falling from the back of his neck, possibly due to the summer heat. Because Hajin didn’t have much time left, he purchased a few suitcases, but unlike him, the man’s only luggage was a large bag.

He barged inside the room, glaring at Hajin, who was staring back at him, and if he forced the latter with his eyes.

“Where is my room?”

“In front of the washroom.”

The man with no manners stated what needed to be said and then left the room. The odor of his hot sweat remained in the area where he walked. Hajin stood frozen, rubbing his elbows and sighing deeply. He should have put more money down. It would have been far more convenient for him to die alone.

“Do you eat your meals at home?”

“Excuse me. I also just came yesterday you can ask the landlord anything you want…”

“Say you don’t know if you don’t know.”

The man did anything he wanted. Water droplets splattered from his hair strands everywhere after he bathed and aggressively dried his hair with a towel as he passed Hajin and opened the fridge. The stench of heavy sweat, which had been his first impression, now vanished.

“Are you going to eat?”

“I ate earlier…”

The man had a very nasty habit. He asked the question but did not listen to the response.

The man pulled two slices of bread from the fridge, which Hajin had eaten earlier, and set them on the bare table, without a bowl.

Hajin’s impression had been crumpled. Crumbs splattered on the floor wherever the man moved his hands. Despite the fact that he was powdering his bread crumbs in that manner, as if he hadn’t learned anything, he moved his legs up and down. The vibration could be felt all the way up to Hajin’s shoulder.

“How old are you?”

“I was about to ask you that anyway. Why do you speak to me informally when you don’t even know my age?”

“I am asking you now.”

“No…that is not the point..”

“You are a fucking chatterbox. If you don’t want to answer, then don’t.”

He was being too much. Even though he only worked two years as a teacher, this level of rudeness would even be hard to tolerate by the former Korean educator. Hajin put his hand on his waist and approached him. The bread crumbs fell randomly on the floor, which was annoying.

“I’m Park Hajin, 31 years old.”

“You’re older than I thought. You look like you are in your 20s.”

“Ha…”

“It’s a compliment though?”

The man was brazen. Hajin sighed sharply, dropping his shoulders before raising his voice.

“I have a contract here for 6 months so let’s live with courtesy, okay?”

“Don’t I have courtesy?”

The man swallowed the second piece of the bread completely and asked, tilting his head. It was Hajin who was dumbfounded by his confidence.

“Don’t speak informally to me.”

“Why?”

“How old are you?”

“30.”

“I am much older than you and it is also our first time meeting each other, why are you speaking informally of your own accord?”

“Then you too, speak informally to me, then.”

Ignoring Hajin’s nervous voice, the man answered casually as if he didn’t give a damn, before rolling his lips to blow a wind. The crumbs that were on the table scattered everywhere. Hajin wanted to say something, as his face coloured with astonishment.

“What are you doing?”

That was it. Hajin increased the tone of his voice. The man hit his palm together and brushed off the powder from his hands, raising one eyebrow as if he had felt something was wrong.

“What?”

“If you do that, who will clean the floor?”

“Well…I guess I can clean it up.”

The man muttered why he had to raise his voice like that and gathered the bread crumbs that had fallen on the floor with his feet. It would have been a relief if he had sandals or socks on, but no he was barefooted. Hajin’s face was shadowed in contempt. I was the fool for trying to talk. 

“Excuse me.”

Hajin sighed as if it was a reflex. His life, which didn’t have much time left, the plan of spending what was left leisurely and comfortably in a quiet rural seaside seemed to crack. Hajin swept his thin hair and aggressively stared at the man.

“I don’t have much time to live.”

Hajin didn’t have friends nor family. Even if it was an excuse because he wanted to live looking forward, to be more frank, it was because he couldn’t put up with his surroundings. That was why the only people who knew that he wasn’t going to live much longer were the doctor who diagnosed him and the principal who accepted his resignation letter. He didn’t know if there was already a rumor about him in the teacher’s lounge.

Anyway, Hajin didn’t expect to inform the man who he met the first time today of his weakness. What was even funnier were the tears which didn’t come even when he was diagnosed, came then. It seemed to be tears of unfairness. An injustice that until death, he couldn’t do what he wanted.

“I found this place after much difficulty. While dying, I want to die quietly…comfortably.”

Of course, he didn’t have the thought of letting the landlord clean up his body. However he wanted to stay there until he couldn’t move freely. He thought the period until then would be D-180. Hajin recalled the large “D-179 ” written on his phone’s home screen.

“Let’s not bother each other…and live properly.”

Quietly. That word was the point. A very brief silence ensued and soon the man, who was listening with his arms folded, snorted. Hajin covered his heated up eyes with his hands and opened his mouth. It was a very unexpected reaction.

“Is dying something special?”

“…Hu-Huh?”

“You seemed to be scared of dying but it’s nothing much.”

“…”

It was amazing. How could he say such ignorant words to someone who was about to die? Hajin didn’t want sympathy, compassion but he didn’t expect such shameless words so naturally his face distorted.

The man crouched on the floor and collected the bread crumbs. He raised his head and smiled.

“I could die before you.”

“What did you say…”

“I said, let’s get along.”

Hajin thought he should turn on the air conditioner. The sunlight that pierced through the windows was so strong, sweat flowed down his back. The day was D-179 and it started with a mannerless man.

“Excuse me, those things in the sink, is that yours?”

“Sink? What’s there?”

I thought if he asked me what was there, was it an accident. It had been a week since Hajin started living in the same house, but in different rooms with that man. He tried his best not to talk to him.

That day, after a long time, Hajin wanted to walk along the coast so he woke up early but he happened to see a sink full of water with three black underwear hanging there. He didn’t even touch it so he knocked on the man’s door abruptly and the following was the result. The man asked back with sleepy eyes. Hajin shook his head and pointed at the bathroom.

“Underwear.”

“Ah, that’s mine.”

The man yawned and nodded, as if he had remembered it. Hajin clicked his tongue and snapped, annoyed beyond his limits.

“Clean it up, quick.”

“But I kept it there for washing.”

“Then when did you keep it there?”

“Was it yesterday? Last night, I guess.”

“Do you do laundry all day long? I have to freshen up, so hurry and clean it up.”

That man’s face morphed as Hajin raised his voice. Whether it was Hajin didn’t care much, but when he looked closely the man had a huge scar under his right eyebrow. Looking at it, he assumed the man must have had his try at being a thug somewhere, probably he got hurt from there.

The man in shorts opened his mouth wide, yawning three times in a row and headed slowly to the bathroom, as if it was bother. Hajin immediately followed suit.

“Please clean everything up immediately from now on.”

“You whine so much. I don’t even need a pigeon.”

“Pigeon?”

“You know the bird which cries, popping its head out whenever it’s free.”

He meant to say cuckoo, but Hajin didn’t bother to correct him. It was not worth retorting back any more. The man roughly twisted the three wet underwear roughly and walked past Hajin. On the way to the veranda, where the laundry drying rack was located, water dropped from the wet clothes like the bread crumbs spilled by Hansel and Gretel.

“The trail is pretty long.”

Anyway, that man was the type of person who never learned. Hajin shook his head and closed the bathroom door tightly before wiping the sink several times with a shower head, and picked up his toothbrush.