Chapter 346: Out of Harem's Way

Chapter 346: Out of Harem's Way

There were six men rowing, none of whom appeared to be armed, and Grayson, who had a sword still in its sheath. If they were spearheading the attack, it was going to be a very short fight. They also had Biadet, which would help balance the odds, but she didnt look like she was here to fight. She was standing at the back of the boat, balanced on the end of the stern. One step back and shed be in the water.

Laney, the other random variable in the equation, came stomping out of the surf, slashing at the waves with her sword like she was teaching them a lesson. She was soaked through. Her outfit was laden with medals and various unnecessary decorations, so it was probably pretty heavy even before shed dunked herself in seawater.

Colin, you look the same, she shrieked at me. I couldnt prove it was an insult, but circumstantial evidence was pretty overwhelming. Nice sword and shield, she said with a supercilious grin. I used to have a set like that when I was a child.

You still are a child. I pulled my wooden sword out from my belt. And dont be fooled by appearances.

I passed a little magic into the hilt, letting it flow along the edge of the dull, plant-based blade. It began to glow with a yellow light that was just about visible in the sunshine.

It was a mistake. It was a big mistake. Laneys eyes lit up even brighter than the sword.

Ho ho, the boy has ascended to man. Now you are worthy of a princess.

I flicked the Off switch and regretted everything (which was easy to do since thats my normal mental state).

Dont get carried away, its just a trick, I backpedalled.

It is a sign, said Laney, dripping. It means together we can fulfil our destinies. Youd like to help me fulfil my destiny, wouldnt you? Im sure you could fill it to its fullest.

No thanks.

We can achieve so much together, Colin. As often as you like. The leer on her face was enough to make the sword light up again, ready for danger.

She looked at it like it was another sign. She thrust her own sabre into the sand. It sank in about halfway. Truce.

I wasnt aware we were at war.

No war does not mean no danger, she said, which was certainly true. Dont resist your destiny, Colin. She licked her lips. Now that you are free of that two-faced harridan, we can finally be together.

Biadet had warned me, but like a fool I had ignored her. My hubris had driven me towards my doom. Again.

He prefers to keep his destiny in his own hands, dont you, Colin? said Biadet. The boat was still bobbing a few meters out. I hadnt seen her arrive, and her feet werent even wet. In his hands and preferably somewhere no one can see him.

It was a double attack. I was outnumbered and unfairly cornered on an island with no means of escape.

Biadet, have you met Richina? I think the two of you have a lot in common. I moved aside and indicated Richina. She was standing quietly next to Damicar, an air of tranquillity around her. Until she locked eyes with Biadet. Youre a bit like sisters, I think. One from Peter, one from Arthur. Cousins, perhaps.

Neither said anything. It was like two terminators arriving from different futures at the same point in the past due to an administrative error. As a former time-traveller myself, I can confirm your most vital piece of equipment is a well-maintained diary. Its a fucking nightmare getting to appointments otherwise.

Which of them would survive the encounter? Their eyes remained locked, like each was trying to force the other to download a computer virus. Although, knowing what a troll Biadet was, shed probably try to get the enemy AI to download Windows 95 for that extra-slow demise via the blue-screen of death.

The whole beach seemed to be waiting to see what was going to happen. The first one to speak would probably set the tone for the proceeding battle for domination.

Biadet was a little shorter, but both had the blank expressionless faces of mass-murderers with franchise-potential. Psychopaths have become something of a cool anti-hero character in our culture, but theres nothing endearing about a serial killer with a heart. The first thing you have to ask yourself is, whose heart is it?

Nice to meet you, said Richina.

I might have to kill you, said Biadet.

Kill me if you must, said Richina, smiling innocently. You wont be the first.

But I will be the last.

Somewhere in this world was a machine that spat out crazy teenage girls. Never mind the spires, that was the device that needed to be destroyed.

Okay, great, thats the introductions out of the way. Ah, Commander Grayson. Thanks for coming.

Grayson had jumped off the boat and waded onto shore, a grim expression on his face. He looked a little apprehensive of the staring cannibals, something that hadnt affected either Laney or Biadet in the slightest. The rest of the men remained in the boat, as near to the open sea as possible.

Colin. Nice island. The stench of death is overwhelming.

Thanks. Ive been thinking of redecorating. Something more holiday home and less killing floor, you know, pastel tones rather than crimson and entrails. Its a work in progress. Hows the injury?

It no longer troubles me. Almost as though you never stabbed me. I bring you an invitation.

The council?

He cocked an eyebrow. Yes. They await you on the ship.

Great, I await them on this beach.

He looked around like he was assessing the facilities. It wont be possible, one of their number cannot appear in daylight.

Why not? Are they a vampire?

Grayson looked at me without speaking.

Oh, for fucks sake. Damicar, do you have any garlic?

I popped out of myself and the world came to an abrupt halt. The only time I felt like I was in full control was when time stopped and there was nothing to control.

Around me, everyone was frozen in place, covered in vines or completely devoid of them. Laney was a tangled mess. Biadet Biadet wasnt there. Was she not visible in this world or had she left? It was peculiar, but most things to do with her were.

I sank into myself, inside my mind. This space was where Arthur had built himself an impregnable fortress. I should have asked him for a blueprint.

Wesley? There was only a empty darkness. No sign of little me, no furniture.

Yes, said Wesley from behind me.

I turned around. You were here the whole time?

Where would I go? she said.

Well, this would have been awkward if Biadet hadnt interrupted me earlier. More awkward.

What about Arthurs place? I thought you were moving back in with him.

You still need me, I think.

Youre going to be my bodyguard, too? Ive got quite a unit watching out for me. Shame theyre all liars.

I didnt lie to you.

Oh, please. This isnt the Isle of Semantics, Wesley. You knew Arthur was here and wanted me to do his bidding. You know, Arthur, the guy who betrayed you?

We all make mistakes.

Sure, he left his shoelace undone and accidentally fell into another womans vagina. Whoops.

Wesley frowned. If I had never betrayed him, I probably wouldnt be able to forgive him. But we all make mistakes. Forgiveness is something you have to give with an open heart. You should try it.

You think I should forgive the people who fucked me over?

Them? No. I think you should forgive yourself.

For what? I havent done anything. Never mind. What happens when Arthur turns on me? Who will you side with then?

I wont hold his past actions against him, that would give us no chance of a future together. But I wont be made a fool of twice. If he disappoints me again, I will eviscerate him from existence.

Not a bad answer.

Youre right, she continued, slightly less terrifyingly, I cant guarantee things will turn out the way I hope. Arthur is a lot like Peter.

Youre telling me this now?

In that he believes what hes doing is for the best. Its a dangerous way to think. Thats why I think youre the right person to deal with all of this. You never think what youre doing is for the best.

Couldnt argue with her there. Did you really kill him?

Yes. Many times. He kept coming back forgive me, Ive changed, Im not the same man I was until I lost my temper and destroyed his ability to use others as a vessel.

He cant come here? He cant take my body?

No. He cant simply jump in. He would have left here a long time ago if he could. This is his prison, which I put him in. But that doesnt mean I abandoned him. Richer, poorer, in sickness and in health. He will forever be my burden, but I will ensure he will never be yours.

It was hard not to accept her at her word. Even if someones bullshitting you, you have to give it up for them when they do it really well.

And what about Richina? You didnt trust her before.

Shes new. Whatever he did to her, shes just his herald. He can see the world through her eyes. She isnt a threat to you.

I was inclined to trust her. Didnt mean it was a good idea. She could easily turn on me, or be turned against me, but she was like Grayson. He would kill me if ordered to, but hed tell me first and give me a head start, which is more than most people would do.

I returned to the regular world. Everything was as before, even Biadet was there, technically.

Fine, lets go.

Grayson seemed surprised by my change of heart. You wish to go aboard the ship?

Sure, why not? Whats the worse thing that could happen? Dont answer, youll ruin my appetite. Laney, stay here.

What? Why do I have to stay here.

To make sure no one attacks the island while Im gone.

Her eyes flared with ferocity as she pulled her sword out of the sand and raised it above her head. This island is under the protection of FENGARAD! she bellowed.

The islanders looked a bit nonplussed at being suddenly annexed.

I waded out to the boat. The water was colder than I expected, but it felt good once it got to my waist.