Volume 2 - CH 2.1

Chapter 2 - Determination (Part 1)

"Kuromine-kun. Do you want some more?"

.............

"Kuromine-kun?"

"Riku. What are you dreaming about?"

A blow hit my left shoulder. It looks like Kana, who was sitting next to me, elbowed me.

That brought my consciousness back to reality. I had thought about so many things during the meal, and I was going crazy because of it.

We were eating right now. I was also invited to their house, so Kana and I ate together in the living room.

On the round wooden table were croquettes, boiled spinach rice, and salad. ...... It was the same kind of menu I'd seen so many times when I lived with Hoshimiya. I felt nostalgic.

"Do you want another dish, Kuromine-kun?"

"............No, this is fine."

"I see. Don't be shy, okay?"

Hoshimiya smiled an innocent smile without caution. This kind gesture hurt me to the bone.

My heart felt like it was being pierced by needles.

"Riku-kun, are you okay?"

The person who asked this was a kind looking old lady sitting in front of me. She looked at me with threadbare eyes, and I couldn't tell if she could see or not. She was smiling softly, making the wrinkles on her face even deeper. Her name is Soeda-san. She lost her husband a few years ago and lived alone until she came to take care of Hoshimiya here. She told us a few days ago that she lived in the city when she was young and moved to the countryside when she was 60.

I nodded at Soeda-san and said, "It's okay."

"Oh, yes. Would you like another drink?"

"...... Please do."

"Hey, Soeda-san, how come you're the one giving her a refill?"

"Haha. Because she looks like she's starving."

What the hell? On the contrary, my appetite is diminishing.

I flashed a slight smile at Soeda-san, who looked calm, or perhaps a little natural. I had no choice but to pass the bowl of rice to Hoshimiya, who was guarding the rice cooker next to her.

As I watched Hoshimiya serve the rice, I remembered the time right after I came to this house.

***

"Um, nice to meet you ...... huh? Are you Kana's boyfriend?"

"Huh? No, no, no, Ayana? What are you talking about? That's too much to joke about."

"...... What do you mean?"

"Ayana.....!"

Kana's eyes widened and her mouth quivered as she watched Hoshimiya tilt his head. Not understanding Hoshimiya's true intentions, she looked confused and stopped thinking.

The next person to open her mouth was me.

"I'm Riku Kuromine from your class."

"What?! We're classmates?! No way... I'm sorry!"

"Don't worry about it. I'm not very famous, so it's understandable if you don't remember me."

Hoshimiya immediately lowered his head, and I replied with a light laugh.

It was strange to see how calmly I could answer.

"It's annoying when I don't remember my own classmates. ......Sorry."

"You really don't have to worry about it. Lift your head."

"I'm so sorry. ......"

Hoshimiya's expression was a little hard to define as she looked up.

The atmosphere became a bit heavy, but Hoshimiya gathered his courage and asked me.

"Well, I knew Kana would come, but ..... why is Kuromine-kun coming too?"

"I came to visit you as a representative of the boys. Hoshimiya, you're sick, right?"

"Yes. I suddenly got a high fever, and my heart was in trouble too ............. but now, as you can see, I'm fine. I plan to return to school after the summer vacation."

"I see. I was worried when I heard that you were going to quit school."

"Quit...? Oh yes, I'm fine. I'll explain the situation and go to school later, so don't worry."

Hoshimiya smiled cheerfully, probably to attract energy.

......Oh, some kind of 'distraction', huh.

"I'm sorry, but can I stay here too? It's a little weird if I come uninvited but ask for strange things."

"Well, I'd say that having a boy stay over requires ...... a lot of preparation ......."

"Actually, I don't have the train fare home. If you don't let me stay in this house, I will sleep on the street. I might have to walk for a few days to get home. "

"That's too chaotic, Kuromine-kun. ......Hmm, I understand. I'll discuss it with Soeda-san first. Maybe she'll allow it."

"Soeda-san?"

"Yes, the one who took care of me."

With a shy smile, Hoshimiya explained.

"Well, I'm going to talk to Soeda-san, so please wait a moment."

As if nothing had happened, Hoshimiya disappeared into the back of the house.

Kana, who had been standing there in a daze, suddenly regained consciousness and came to me.

"Hey, Riku! What the hell was that?"

"Amnesia. I explained it to you on the train, didn't I?"

"Yes, I did. But what Ayana forgot was about the accident..."

"Why do you think she forgot the accident?"

"Because ...... it was too painful for her heart to bear.....?"

"Yes. I mean, if there's something you can't bear, you'll definitely forget the things related to the accident."

"That's ...... a lie, it's ...... not!"

Kana shook in disbelief when she heard my explanation. I took a few deep breaths to get myself together, and then she asked me with a worried look on her face.

"Riku, are you okay?"

"No, I'm not okay."

"Really? But you were really cool just now. You even improvised with Ayana. I can't think of ...... anything else. I don't know if that was real or not. ......I'm just surprised."

"I feel the same way as Kana."

"Eh────"

The difference between me and Kana is one thing. I've prepared myself.

Always....

Even when things seem to be going well, fate will not let us take the path of happiness so easily.

Something unexpected is bound to happen.

People's reactions will probably vary greatly depending on whether they understand this or not.

At least Hoshimiya lives in an environment that can make her smile.

It's the only thing that calms me down. ......

"It's ...... too painful, you know."

"I'll follow Hoshimiya for now. I don't know what will happen if I stimulate his past memories too much."

"............Yes."

"First, I want to examine the situation and understand the problem. Then we can think about the next step ...... and then we'll see what happens."

"That's good, Riku. You're being very cool."

"I'm just trying to be ...... cool."

If I loosened the ties that bind my emotions just a little bit, I would definitely cry and let it all go right now.

Because I'm ......

A weak man────