Chapter 50 - 50 - Starting Over

Peggy POV

What did he just say? He's letting me go?  ​​

I was staring at him, I couldn't say anything.

"I don't want to hurt you again. We may really end up hating each other if we continue this. We could be parents to Caden. I promise I will be a good father to him so come home. You could stay at the house in Primrose. It was yours after all. I could stay in Queen's." He said without looking at me.

Is he talking about the house he bought for me? So it's still there. Wait. He said he'll let me go. Is it for good? Do I really want that? I know he's right. If I marry him, it's impossible that he won't need to force me again. But would it really be forced? Today, it was. But if he just asked me earlier, I would willingly surrender myself to him.

I was hurt when he forced me. But I wasn't really mad at him. I was just disappointed. I wanted something from him. I want him to want me because he loves me, not because of lust.

"Do you still love me?" I asked, still staring at him.

He then turned his face and looked at me.

"I do. And I hate you. I don't trust you." He said without even blinking an eye.

That hurts. But at least he said he still loves me. I need to make a decision. I wanted us to have another chance. I was the one who ruined everything. So I have to do everything so he could trust me and love me again completely.

"Can we start over?" I asked.

He was surprised. I know he thought I was mad at him and I would agree with him. But I can't let him go. I made a mistake leaving him. I just made it worse. I have to fix this.

"P-Peggy -"

"I still love you. I really do. I have never stopped loving you." I said it. I will do everything to get my family back. 

He brushed his hand to my face again.

"I might hurt you again. I'm not the same person as before. I've been dating a lot of women since you left." He suddenly said.

Again, it hurts. But what do I expect? It's been 3 years.

"Then I guess I have to fight for you. I'll do everything for you, love." I suddenly called him love. It was our term of endearment for each other. I missed calling him that.

He brushed his thumb into my lower lip. I saw him gritted his teeth when he saw the cut.

"I'm sorry." He said it again.

"I'm okay now. I'm not mad. Just disappointed but at least you're sorry and you said you still love me. So I'm fine now."

"You should hate me." He answered before leaning forward and gave me a quick kiss on the lips.

"I missed you." I blurted.

He smiled at last. "Let's clean you up."

He helped me clean my body since I was really feeling sore. I couldn't even walk straight so he carried me outside the bathroom. He put me on the couch first to clean the bed. He removed the sheet with a blood stain on it and I could see guilt on his face. He carried me again and gently laid me down on the bed.

He laid beside me and pulled me closer to him. I turned to his side and hugged him. I missed this. I missed him. We didn't say a word. We just laid down on the bed embracing each other. I couldn't say that I was happy. But I was relieved at least. He didn't answer me clearly when I asked him to start over but I could feel he wanted it as well. I felt him kissing me on the forehead before I closed my eyes to sleep.

I slowly opened my eyes when I felt the sun shine into my face. I looked at the other side of the bed but Jayden wasn't there anymore. I stood up only to feel my head hurt so much.

"You should rest. We still have a few hours." He said while coming out of the bathroom. I could smell the scent of his aftershave. God! I want him.

"I have to pack our things." I said.

"Missy was already done with Caden's and hers. I'll take care of your things. Just tell me how." He said while scratching his head. Is he blushing?

He frowned. "Don't start."

"What?" I asked innocently. But I really wanted to laugh. For some reason, I saw the old Jayden.

"I know what you're thinking. Just tell me what to do and stop making that face. It's irritating." He said, annoyed.

That was him a few years back. He'll blush and get annoyed with me when I laugh about it. He'll call me stupid, an idiot but he would always shower me with kisses.

He suddenly walked towards me and kissed me on the cheek. I was startled. I didn't see that coming.

"Good morning." He said. 

This time I was the one blushing. Heat rose to my cheeks.

We heard a knock and Caden came running.

"Mommy! Good morning!" He was smiling when he climbed on the bed.

I kissed him on the forehead and smiled back.

"Did you wake up early?" I asked.

"Yes mommy! Aunt Missy helped me pack. You should start packing your clothes or we'll leave you behind." He said with his eyes sparkling excitedly.

Jayden pat his son on the head and stood up. I saw him go outside and when he came back, he was holding a food tray.

"Daddy cooked our breakfast. It's delicious Mommy!" Caden exclaimed.

I didn't expect that either. It was like when he found out I was pregnant. I wanted to cry again. I thought I wouldn't experience it with him anymore.

He put the food tray on the bed. When I looked at it, it was my favorite seafood pasta. I remember the day he proposed to me. He also served me this food.

"Mommy what happened to your wrists and your lips?" Caden suddenly asked.

I saw Jayden tensed. Caden looked at him.

"Daddy did you do this?" He frowned while asking his father.

"No, honey. Ah yes your father did this but we were playing last night. Mom was not hurt, don't worry." I lied. Guilt was all over Jayden's face.

"Oh. Like police and stuff right? You should have called me. I want to play with mommy and daddy too." Caden said. He was so innocent.

Jayden suddenly pulled him in his arms.

"I'm sorry. I promise it won't happen again." He whispered, but he was actually looking at me.

I smiled and started eating while Jayden started packing my clothes.