Chapter 156: Somebody stops this stupid forced comedy!
I stretched my shoulders as I headed to a convenience store.
Even though I don't need to eat anymore thanks to the reserve of energy in Ortro's stomach, buying cheap food became a habit I developed over the years, besides that, I have to buy food for Umaru since my useless mother doesn't know how to cook and what she prepares could hurt Umaru's stomach.
"You're cute" – Tsubaki let out a soft laugh.
"What?" – I raised an eyebrow.
"Despite the fact that you say you hate your sister, you are always taking care of her" – Tsubaki's voice overflowed with tenderness. – "And not only are you protecting her, you really care about her, that's cute~"
My lip trembled and I didn't want to answer.
Even though it's already night, this is the best time to shop at the convenience store as there are discounts of up to 50% at night.
Even though I prefer fried food, Japanese food has something wonderful called Bento, a proper lunch box for people without freedom to recover enough energy to continue working until death.
When I entered the store, several people looked at me.
"Tch, that bastard is here..."
"That boar again..."
"Shit, the best offers will be lost"
I ignored the jerks whose appearances aren't even worth describing and took a shopping basket to collect some necessary items.
"Why does it look like he's going to start a fight?" – System Goddess asked curiously. – "It even seems that there is a group that is planning how to take you down"
"In this city, there is a ridiculous tradition where convenience stores put discount stamps on bento at this time" – I picked up Umaru's cookies. – "Since there are a limited number of bentos, the idiots hit each other to take the bento and apparently nobody cares about this since both the police and the yakuza let this happen despite the fact that some people have ended up interned in the hospital, but hey, no one has died so it doesn't matter"
"That sounds stupid" – System Goddess muttered in disbelief.
"It's stupid" - I mentally shrugged. – "But getting cheap food in exchange for some blows is worth it, many students do not have money to eat properly so this is a great help, maybe that is why the government allows this stupidity since the medical expenses are not paid by the government increasing the profits of the hospitals... Come to think of it, it is actually an excellent scam..."
It seems that there are still many political tricks that I can learn.
When I got what I needed, I went over to the bento counter and waited for the store owner to put out the discount stamps.
"Why don't you just force the store owner to give you free food? Now you are the heir to a prestigious group" – System Goddess asked with disdain. – "These insignificant people should feel honored that you are willing to trample on them"
"It's because of that kind of cocky attitude that cultivators are idiots who get into stupid trouble, I wouldn't be surprised if protagonists in cultivation worlds act like pretentious idiots" - I tried hard not to roll my eyes.
"Says the man who caused a genocide in two worlds" - System Goddess spoke with irony.
"Those worlds were uncivilized so teaching them manners was my duty as a civilized person" - I responded apathetically.
"..." – System Goddess sighed. – "Your definition of manners worries me"
I ignored this uncivilized woman's claims and watched as the store owner put up the discount stamps.
When the store owner finished his work, he walked off to the back of the store causing chaos.
"Do things as planned! Don't let that animal get close!"
"Kill the bastard!"
Five idiots rushed to immobilize me to which I yawned in boredom and hit them on their chins knocking them unconscious.
"Why do these people hate you so much?" – Tsubaki asked me curiously.
"I'm famous for taking multiple bentos even though there's an unwritten rule that one person can only have one bento." – I kicked apart an idiot's shoulder joints. – "They even gave me the stupid nickname of 'Glutton', these idiots are too childish"
Before the awakening of my system, I could already deal with these idiots with ease so currently, this is so boring that I just want to leave.
"Luis! We meet again!"
Not again...
I ignored the girl who called out my name which made the girl furious.
"Do not ignore me!"
I sighed and raised my hand to stop a kick that was headed for my chin. – "Why do you always want to kick my face? Do you want to show me your underwear so badly?"
The girl didn't respond to my obvious taunt and tried to back away, but since I'm not in the mood for bullshit I used acupuncture on her ankle making her entire leg go numb.
"What?!" – The girl screamed when she felt that she couldn't move her leg so I kicked her abdomen taking the air out of her so she would stop bothering me.
"Hahaha we meet again!" – A second troublesome girl rushed to attack my left side taking advantage of the fact that my left hand is busy with the food basket.
"I already told you, don't yell when you make a surprise attack..." I sighed and used my left leg to give a simple kick towards the girl's hands which were holding chopsticks and when she lost her balance I used my left leg again to kick her abdomen leaving her motionless on the ground.
"I love your lack of chivalry" – System Goddess was enjoying herself. – "Although you were soft with them, those blows did not even leave a scratch... Is it because they are both pretty?"
"Yes" – I answered the obvious and took two trays of bento. – "If they were not pretty, I would have broken them one or two limbs as I did with the other idiots"
When I got the bento, I walked away from the group of idiotic teenagers and headed to the register.
"Today you only took two" - The old man at the register smiled kindly at me.
I shrugged. – "Today I am not very hungry"
I paid for the food and left, I hope Umaru doesn't keep playing video games at this hour or her brain is going to rot.
"Wait!" – The first girl who attacked me ran to stop me when I reached a park that serves as a shortcut to my new house.
"Look, I'm not in the mood for a touching dramatic encounter so just tell me what you want" - I sighed, my mood worsened by exhaustion.
"What was the technique you used to immobilize me? That was new... But most importantly..." – The girl stared at me. – "Why did you only grab two bento? Usually, you take six or seven..."
My appetite has always been big.
I shrugged. - "Today I am not very hungry"
"I know you well enough to know that this is impossible" - The girl narrowed her eyes. – "Did something happen to your family?"
"Luis..." - Tsubaki sighed. – "Don't tell me that she is also in love with you..."
"It's not love" - I wanted to smile ironically. – "It is rivalry, this stubborn girl is obsessed with wanting to beat me in a fight"
"And the blonde woman who used chopsticks?" – Tsubaki asked with irony.
"The same story, a pretty girl with a brain that only understands fights" - I answered dryly. – "She is similar to Miu"
I sighed. - "I insist, growers are trash"
"I think the same" - Tsubaki agreed.
"▂▂▃▃▅▅ (Trash...)" – Kon learned to despise cultivators, she's a cute pet.
"Kill cultivators?" – Ortro is the most violent person in this group despite being the girl with the prettiest appearance...
"Hey Listen! Let's go to a cultivation world for you to fuck every woman while fucking cultivators cry in a corner with a boner of hate!" – Navi has a disturbing imagination.
"..." – System Goddess sighed heavily. – "Okay, I admit it, even I think cultivators are idiots..."
"Indirectly you admit to being an idiot" - I smiled.
"..." – System Goddess pouted and stopped talking.
I got home and when I opened the door I saw that Umaru was in the living room playing video games next to a cute girl with reddish-brown hair and big breasts that don't match her innocent face.
"Umaru, there's school tomorrow so don't corrupt Ebina with your bad habits of staying awake" - I sighed.
"Onii-san!" – The girl screamed in panic when she saw me.
"Did you bring my cookies?!" – Umaru didn't pay attention to the exaggerated reaction of her only friend and she ran to try to snatch the plastic bag from me.
I held Umaru's face. – "What have I told you about sleeping early?"
"Waaa you're going to break me! Onii-chan is going to break me!" – Umaru started to cry so I had to let her go and I looked at the girl who was looking at me with a nervous expression and a reddened face. – "Will you stay for dinner?"
"D-d-d-dinner with Onii-san?!" – The girl's face was so red that she seemed to be about to pass out.
"This has to be a joke..." – Tsubaki sighed. – "How many women do you have in this world?"
"I have no idea" - I sighed and went to the kitchen to make food. – "There are gaps in my memory due to supernatural events, there were also times when I got too drunk and ended up in the houses of women I don't know... Anyway, I have no idea what the future holds for me"
"At least tell me who the new girl is" – Tsubaki sighed. – "She does not seem to be crazy and I like that, there are too many crazy women in your harem..."
"She's called Nana Ebina, she lived next to the previous house where my family lived" - I ignored Tsubaki's last comment.
"Because I once defended her from being harassed, she fell madly in love with me, but since I fell in love with her and didn't want to hurt her, I pretended that I didn't notice her feelings, treating her with a certain indifference" - I washed my hands and started doing dinner with ingredients from my space ring, Ebina deserves a good meal.
"Despite my indifference, she didn't give up and started visiting the house almost every day to see me, eventually she became friends with Umaru, and well, since I didn't want to leave her in that neighborhood full of idiots, I contacted her family to offer her an apartment in this building" – I wish Umaru learned from Ebina's good manners...
"Did her parents agree for her to move in with you?" – Tsubaki asked with surprise.
"They think that if Ebina marries me, she will have an easier life in the city since they think I'm a person with money..." - I shrugged. – "Although now I have money so technically I did not lie to them"
"She looks like a shy girl" – Tsubaki decided not to discuss the fact that I cheated on Ebina's parents. – "Try not to intimidate her too much"
"I won't" – The food was almost ready. – "Ebina is an adorable and responsible girl so I am going to take good care of her"
"I'm jealous of the girls you have sincere feelings for since before you became the monster you are now" – Tsubaki sighed with slight sadness.
"Tsubaki, I may have thousands of women, but I only have one weapon, also..." – I stopped cooking for a moment. – "Among my wives, you are the only one who is literally always with me"
"Luis..." – Tsubaki seemed so moved that she couldn't speak.
"Ahem! I am also here!" – System Goddess interrupted my beautiful moment with my wife.
"You don't have a ring so you're not my wife yet" - I shrugged and continued cooking.
"Tsubaki doesn't have a ring either!" – System Goddess shouted with indignation.
"She doesn't need a ring to be my wife" - I answered without much interest.
"... That's favoritism..." - System Goddess replied sadly.
"Reality is cruel" – I finished cooking. – "But well, I will make you your favorite soup when everyone goes to sleep"
"Yay!" – System Goddess is happy with little things... I envy her...
"Umaru, turn off that stupid game and go wash your hands!" – My shout made Umaru jump scared and rush to the bathroom while Ebina followed her.
I arranged the dishes on the table and sighed when I noticed that my mother was still locked in her new room.
When I reached out to call her, I froze.
"Oh Seiji-kun~♥..."
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[System Notification: 'Rasen', 'Anti-Rasen', 'Reader's Madness' and 'Steel Will' have prevented the user's mind from collapsing]
...
"Don't tell me she's..." - System Goddess was about to say something, but I cut our telepathic link, I turned around and went to the dining room to sit in silence.
"Onii-chan, mom still in her room?" – Umaru sat down to dinner.
I didn't reply and looked at Ebina who was looking at me shyly. – "Ebina, come a moment"
"Huh?" – Ebina looked at me curiously and approached. – "Huh?! Onii-san?!"
I hugged Ebina's waist and pulled her onto my lap, then pressed my face into her hair and focused on the nice smell of her body to try not to think about the shit I just heard. I'm glad I didn't use my sense of smell to look for that woman...
Ebina had passed out due to her embarrassment. I'm sorry Ebina, your sacrifice will not be in vain.
"Hmph!" – Umaru started to make strange noises to get my attention, but I ignored her, I just focused on Ebina's soft hair, I don't want to think about anything else...
Umaru was making angry noises, but when she noticed that I ignored her she started eating.
When the food entered her mouth, she stopped complaining and started devouring her food at full speed.
I'm glad she didn't moan or I'll really have to have my eardrums removed.
So, I spent the rest of dinner cuddling with Ebina as I tried to erase the previous scene from my memory.
[System Notification: The user's great mental strength makes it impossible to erase new memories]
Shit!