Volume 1 - CH 8.3

“Oh.. that’s already… really, I’m good… really…”

“…..”

“So what kind of things do you usually hunt with that blowgun, Omori-san?”

“Little normies.” (TN: the term used is ‘riajuu’ which is internet slang from 2chan for people who live in the real world as opposed to the neets who spend all time on the computer.)

“Eh… i..is that so? You’re hunting normies…”

This is terrible. He reeks of crime.

“Uh so… what is your normal occupation Omori-san…”

“I HAVE NO JOB (UNEMPLOYED)”

Mr. Policeman! Right here!

********************

After all that I hid in the field and waited for two hours.

“…Here it comes!” I whisper.

When the sun went down, the monkey in question appeared.

By the way, about fifteen minutes ago, Yoshida-san said something like, “I just remembered something I got to do” and left. So there are currently only three of us here. That woman really just ran away. Well that’s fine. This is actually fun. What a party pooper.

Be careful not to make any noise and look out for the monkey. It’s hard to see because it’s dark.

“It looks pretty big huh?”

“Yeah. But it also means that our target is big. Omori-san, are you ready to go?”

“I’m about to come.”

What is he talking about? I’m just saying, he’s really out of breath for some reason… He’s out of breath while just sitting there…. And there every 10 seconds or so he makes a strange sound like ‘Dufufu’ or ‘Kopoo’…

“B..by the way Omori-san. You can’t kill a monkey with a blowgun can you?”

“That’s right. A strong tranquilizing medicine prepared by me is applied to the dart. That way we can take it down even just by grazing it.”

“Ah…”

We need to call the cops when this is over.

The monkey seems completely oblivious to us and is wondering defenselessly around the field.

“Doesn’t it seem to be moving oddly slow…?”

“It must be feeling at ease. Omori-san, this is your chance!”

“Here I go.”

Just when I thought Omori-san had his sights set on it… He turns his head towards me and starts talking.

“This stance is called the ‘Chiku-billing stance”, and I named it so because the cylinder I’m holding resembles a chikuwa like this.” (tn: Chikuwa is rolled fish sausage)

“Is that so…?”

I don’t really care.

Omori-san set his aim again.

“Kopaaa!”

He took a quick breath and fired a blowdart.

Fwooosh.

“Direct hit!”

“Wow! With the first shot!”

The arrow hits the target true, and Omori-san’s special powerful tranquilizer knocks the monkey out. It worked like a charm.

Omori-san quietly and slowly lifts his lips from the blowgun.

“That technique is called “Normie Killer”, and the origin of the name is…”

I DON’T WANT TO HEAR THIS!

“Let’s go Hata!”

“Yeah!”

Kei and I went on without Omori-san, who was unusually slow. We rushed over to the fallen monkey. Having the fields destroyed and the frustration of having to wait for more than two hours with some strange old man made us angry.

“What now, you pest! This is what you get when you mess with human’s fields!”

But the moment I saw the monkey…… I held my breath and stood still. The monkey lying on the ground was so pitiful that I felt sorry for him. Moreover…

“This monkey’s arm is…”

“Ah. That’s why it was standing on two legs.”

The monkey only had one arm. It’s not like it was born with only one arm, it seems to have lost it in an accident. Maybe it was moving slowly because it can’t balance right.

Kei and I both felt the anger that had been building in us rapidly withering away. You could tell by looking at the figure. The monkey wasn’t just playing around and destroying the fields and coops. There was nowhere to hide and it was desperate to survive, so it was just thrashing blindly.

“…But we need to get rid of it…”

“…That’s right. That’s the fate of us farmers.”

Our job is to grow crops and deliver them to consumers. In order to do so, many lives must be taken. This is the reason the phrase ‘itadakimasu’ is often mentioned. Before eating food we say ‘itadakimasu’ to express our gratitude for the life given for the meal.

The crops that humans eat are also made at the cost of many lives though. In order to grow one big and healthy sprout, there is a process call ‘thinning’ done to the field. Other sprouts are plucked while they are still small. Not only that, we must get rid of the pests that destroy crops, such as getting rid of this monkey.

That’s what we do.

This is a job that takes many other lives in order to grow new ones. As long as you are a farmer, you can never escape it.

We’re just baby chicks… because the technology is still in its infancy. We want to continue to grow. Otherwise we would feel sorry for all the lives we have taken up to this point. That’s why…

“Fwahahahahahahaha!”

A loud laughing voice echoes in the darkness of the night, shattering the serious atmosphere into pieces. T..this laughter is…

“Yoshida-san!”

“It looks like you’ve successfully captured the monkey alive! Pretty good job for a base vulgar! I commend you! Let me give you a pat on the back!”

Kei frowns in disgust at the remark. Yoshida-san wasn’t reading the room.

“Yoshida. I’m not in the mood for your quips right now. If you don’t need anything then just go home.”

“Hmph. Is that really ok Kei Kamatori?”

“Huh…?”

“I talked to an acquaintance who works at the zoo!”

“A zoo!? For real Yoshida?!”

“Hmph… of course. They were just looking for a male for breeding. There is no danger of inbreeding if they use a wild monkey, so he’s welcomed there.”

“But Yoshida-san… This monkey is missing an arm. Is that ok?” When I ask this Yoshida-san snorts ‘hmph’.

“It looks like the monkey lost its arm in an accident. Only genes are important in reproduction. There is no problem if it’s not a genetic defect. If he’s strong enough to survive with just one arm, the offspring will be strong too!”

“I see… We are in your debt Yoshida.” Kei says and bows his head.

“I..it’s not like I’m doing it for you! D..d..d..don’t get me wrong, base vulgar!”

Yoshida-san blushes so much that she’s glowing in the dark. With a glowing red face she also says, “Kei Kamatori… didn’t you just say that getting rid of monkeys is the destiny of farmers?”

“Yeah I said that. I mean…”

“YOU’RE SO STUPID!”

“!?”

“Farming is not just about growing crops like you guys do! Don’t be so arrogant to others!”

“Arrogant…?”

“You mean we have to kill the monkey? Is that the fate of farmers? No! The world of agriculture is vaster than you think! Raising animals like I do and managing forests like the forestry engineers are also parts of agriculture! If we put all that knowledge and passion together… like if you and I join forces… we don’t have to just hunt them as vermin, but can find ways for humans and animals to coexist. Isn’t that possible too!? That’s why it’s arrogant, you idiot!”

She was bright red, but even so, Yoshida-san got it all out in one go. Her passionate words hit us hard.

“…That’s right”, says Kei as he relaxes his expression.

“In the face of the fact that crops are destroyed by animals, this may still be an idealistic theory. However it is also true that this idealism has led to developments in agriculture. Where there is no idealism there is no growth. I will cherish those words of yours.”

This is two people who recognize each other and communicate with each other. And…

“…”

“Stop it old man.”

Omori-san slowly aimed a blowgun at Kei, so I quickly smashed the tube with a chop. Oh, this was just a rolled up poster…

******************

That’s how it all came together.

The crops were protected. And on top of that, Minori (who had been hit by Super Hitoshi-kun, and was blamed for the crime) conveniently lost her memory. She tilted her head and said “Huh? Did I make this? Hmmm…” She had no particular doubts. Thankfully she’s an idiot.

The monkey was properly adopted by the zoo. He was also given the name “Muko-dono” and it is said that he is spending every day in bliss absorbed in mating. Oh how I envy him.

In addition, we have launched a study group on animal damage control in cooperation with other departments, and are exploring agriculture in a way that allows animals and humans to coexist. It is a complex but worthwhile research.

Many things have happened but Omori-san is still unemployed.