Volume 2 - CH 5

I don’t even remember how exactly I made my way home. When I regained my senses, I was laying in my bed, and eventually, morning arrived. I thought about the previous night’s incident. I had two choices. First, I could continue making music with Gabriel and Nelina. The second is to side with Lara, then save Boudicia, and offer myself to graffiti. And yet, I didn’t choose either. That’s why I received the natural conclusion when I ran out of time.

Such a simple answer it was, and yet I couldn’t have been more foolish. And as I resented my own actions, I received a message on my phone. Subconsciously, I reached for it and checked. It was a message from Nelina. Oh yeah, she said she’d contact me. I opened the message, which had a location attached, only stating “Here.” I couldn’t even motivate myself to put on my glasses, just staring at the message. I realized she was talking about Millenium Square.

Millenium Square is a large plaza located in the center of Bristol. It was a relatively new space amidst the already flourishing green and grassy areas, taken care of beautifully, and there was even a canal with flowing water. Honestly, I really didn’t feel like going. I just wanted to roll around in bed and sleep. It’s got nothing to do with me anymore, I thought and closed my eyes…

However, I’m not changing at all. Gabriel called me an instrument. At first, I thought he was just telling me to practice really hard and follow his orders. But now, it makes much more sense. When I was told I had no soul, I decided to run away. Not from Nelina in particular, but from facing my own music. I didn’t stop making music because I was hurt. I was scared of being hurt from now on. Terrified that people would find out that my music has no soul. If I truly wanted to improve and make myself a better person…then I would have asked right then and there. What exactly she meant by that.

Producing greater music than before—That was the one thing expected from an instrument, and I couldn’t even fulfill that. I looked away from the truth in front of me, and ran away to protect myself. But of course, that’s not good. I don’t want to erase what I’ve experienced after coming to Bristol…or that I met her. What Boudicia inherited and accepted with her left hand, I should do the same. I got up from my bed, put on my glasses—and then, the world in front of me turned clearer.

*

“Geez, you’re late.”

When I arrived at the location I was sent, I managed to quickly spot Nelina walking around. She smiled as if nothing happened, not knowing of my determination.

“I’m perfectly on time. You’re just here too early, Nelina-san,” I said and tried to speak with a deeper voice than usual.

However, this minuscule effort didn’t faze Nelina much.

“Hehe, the face you make when you find Nelina is just so fun.”

“That makes no sense. So, what did you want to talk about?”

“Seriously…Rushing ahead like a child. Nelina wants to do that over there!” She said and pointed at a skating rink.

When she sent me the location for Millenium Square, I didn’t give it much thought, but I kept it in the back of my mind. They’d periodically open up this place. The rectangular space was filled with ice, and people wearing all sorts of clothes danced on top of it. It felt like an exciting side activity for a few hours.

“Don’t wanna,” I responded immediately.

I came here to talk with Nelina. I can’t afford to waste time like this.

“Waaaaah?! But Nelina wants to try! Or what, you can’t skate, Yoshi?”

“That’s not the problem here!”

I am bad at moving my body. I never excelled at sports since I was young. I had some experience with skiing, but I never tried skating. And even if I had experience, I doubt I’d succeed in any way. And I don’t want Nelina to see when I embarrass myself…or more importantly, I doubt we can get any proper talking done like that.

“Hehe, how cute! You don’t need to be nervous, Nelina will hold your hand.”

“No thanks.”

“But Nelina can’t speak English, and she can’t skate on her own! If you don’t wanna join Nelina, then she’s got an idea up her sleeve!”

“You can’t threaten me anymore, Nelina-san.”

Or so I said, but hearing her following words, my determination was shattered into a thousand pieces.

“Hmph, then Nelina will just have to tell Gabriel who exactly the Ghost of Bristol really is!”

“…What did you just say?”

“You heard Nelina, right? She knows everything about you, after all.”

Nelina is right. I heard it perfectly. She’s gonna tell Gabriel who the Ghost is. I once again held my head in disbelief. Could such a thing even be possible? Boudicia and Gabriel clashed before, true enough, but he shouldn’t know that she’s the Ghost of Bristol. Only that she’s a violent graffiti writer friend of mine. I don’t know why Gabriel is so obsessed with the Ghost. But if he found out that it was Boudicia, things could escalate extremely quickly. I have to avoid this route at all costs.

And this had me thinking. Nelina knows that Boudicia is the Ghost of Bristol. Yet, she hasn’t informed Gabriel of this. Judging from their previous exchanges, she clearly doesn’t have any level of sympathy for Boudicia, and this would be her easiest way to remove her from the picture. But, she didn’t do so…to negotiate with me? Then there’s a pretense to this…Namely, that I would protect Boudicia. And if she wasn’t sure of that, she wouldn’t use this as her card.

I looked at Nelina once more. She wasn’t just some selfish princess. She knew exactly how to move everything in her favor. A personified greed for control, so to speak. And because she holds this card, she made it impossible for me to just go home. Then again, that doesn’t change the fact I still needed to talk to her. The location may have changed, but not my goals. Plus, threatening me to stay here…it’s hard to believe her only desire is to go ice skating with me.

As Nelina saw me head toward the white tent, she tagged after me with a satisfied smile. I paid seven pounds to the employee and told them my shoe size. I had 8, and Nelina’s was the equivalent of 3. The shoes I got back were colored in a profound blue, almost like they attempted to wake me up, with the metal blade beneath the sole. I figured they’d just hand out regular string shoes, but the one pushed onto me reminded me of genuine skiing shoes.

I sat down on an open chair and put on my shoes. But when I stood up, I already realized how unstable I was. I couldn’t even walk properly at times. Contrary to that, Nelina looked like she was back in her element, entering the rink. I chased after her and set food on the ice surface. I was worried I’d just tip over right away, but the long blade under my shoes acted as a fairly decent hold. That being said, moving forward was an entirely different story. If I step forward with my right leg, my left moves back. Same for the opposite, too.

While somehow managing to keep my legs standing, I reached a wall I could put my hand onto. As for Nelina, she had already mastered it, moving forward, backward, and twirling on the spot. It’s like she danced through the air. I once again looked down at my wobbly feet. This is the difference between us. She’s always free, acting as she likes. And I can’t move forward, frozen in space. And this wasn’t just related to skating.

“Hehe, like a fairy, right?”

She finished one round inside the rink and then stopped in front of me with a smile. She spoke with a faint voice like we were the only two people who existed in this world.

“To me, you look more like the devil.”

Whenever I hear this voice of hers, my head just turns blank, my nerves spazzing out.

“A succubus? Aw, geez. Did Nelina seduce you?”

“Don’t play dumb now.”

Without even knowing how I feel—or so I’d like to say, but she’s probably more than aware. And then, she reached her hand out toward me.

“Come, Yoshi.”

It’s always been like this. Even when we played in front of Gabriel. I feel like I’m looking after Nelina, and yet she was the one grabbing my hand. And then she’d forcefully pull me along. Only at the core of it all does she actually let me choose. I made up my mind and took her hand. In response, Nelina showed a satisfied smile and started skating, pulling me after her. This time, she avoided any acrobatic maneuvers and instead focused on letting me skate along the outside. It’s the same when we’re playing music. The air feels so cold, and yet was burning up with heat.

“So?”

After a moment passed, Nelina opened her mouth.

“You wanted to ask Nelina something, right?”

“…Weren’t you the one who wanted to talk?”

“That’s true, but it felt like you had something on your mind.”

There were too many things for me to ask. But as the cup was full of water, overflowing with questions, I picked the next best one I could find.

“Why are we at a skating rink?”

“Because Nelina wanted to skate with you, Yoshi.”

“That can’t be all, right?”

“Then let Nelina rephrase that…It’s so that nobody would get in the way.”

She wasn’t poking fun at me as she usually would. Immediately after, it felt like the noise around me from the skating rink disappeared, turning into average white noise. I couldn’t look away from Nelina. It’s like it was just the two of us in the world.

“Nelina-san, do you know why I came here?”

“Because you were lonely.”

She said without a moment’s hesitation. It’s like the reality she assumed was the only correct one. But…was I really lonely?

“You’re always serious, Yoshi. For Nelina’s sake. You always match with her. You match her singing.”

Every time I played the guitar…Every time I made a new song, Nelina would always sing. I followed that route and my type of music naturally formed. I wasn’t just matching with her or anything…I followed her. Just like she pulled my hand right now.

“That’s why you were lonely. That’s why you were hurting. Because everything you’ve done felt like it was denied. Right?”

She saw through it all. I was being naive again. Even without saying anything, she understood everything. But if so…then that brought up another question.

“Nelina-san.”

“Yeah?”

“Back then, you said that my music has no soul, right?”

“Yeah.”

“What did you mean by that?”

“…You know, Nelina didn’t want to talk badly of you, Yoshi,” she sighed and closed her eyes.

The light of the illumination emphasized her long eyelashes. It was odd to see her stay quiet like that, but eventually, she continued with a clear and determined voice.

“Nelina told you when we first met, right? That she’s greedy. That she wants to have anything. And that she’d do whatever it takes.”

These words send me down a trip down memory lane. I heard of a band that was looking for a guitarist. That’s what started it all. I was innocent back then, only wanting to play the guitar. The feeling of my fingers moving by themselves after enough practice tickled my excitement. In that state, I didn’t have the motivation of playing in a band. But when I asked what the band was like, they all said the same thing: The vocalist is a messed up genius.

But that awakened my interest. I decided to check out the band because I was curious about who this vocalist is. And then, she sat at the meeting place, all by herself. I still remember wondering where the bassist and drummer were. But I figured the band moved as she ordered. And since I heard she was a genius, she probably called the shots—And yet, when I saw her face that day, she looked incredibly anxious. Except, this impression quickly vanished after we began talking for a while. She spoke with such passion that she could put the whole world into her palm.

If I had any talent. If my music could save people. When I nodded, she told me an epic poem about a world where she could sing as much as she likes. And I thought that musicians like her surely would make it big in today’s world. After we talked for a bit, I took a sip from my cafe late to calm myself down from overheating. And then she said: “Don’t make fun of Nelina.”

Right now, I can almost understand her feelings. But back then, I didn’t understand what she said, so I just responded: “You can do it, right?” And before I realized it, I was working with her as the guitarist. The nightmare began, as I continued to try and fulfill all of her ridiculous requests. I was used like an eraser. Eventually, our band became popular, and even as we were right before a major debut, I could only watch it from an outsider’s perspective. I just did as I was told, and I considered it all to be Nelina’s success. I still feel that way. She’s still fighting…to make this world her own.

“Nelina can’t choose her methods. She’ll gulp down mud if need be. She’ll flirt with the producer. Show her fans void dreams. Pretend to be an idol. Obtain knowledge. Bring out the math. With more power comes more possibilities. Everyone will listen…and then the world will become Nelina’s.”

Thinking about it, I’ve never seen her talk about her ideals to someone other than that day. Instead, she uses her power to enter the minds of people with the bare minimum, using whatever methods are at her disposal. The stress resulting from that was then pointed at me. I had forgotten how fragile she could be. And how passionate she was when speaking of the future. Surely, Nelina has a hidden side to her. But, they belong to the same core. And I knew that very well. That being said, that didn’t mean that—

“That band doesn’t even need me.”

“What?! Are you being serious right now?” Nelina let go of me, stopping in her tracks and turned toward me.

She grabbed my shoulder at a distance our foreheads were about to bump into each other.

“But, it’s true. After all…”

“Now listen.” Nelina grabbed my wrist.

Strongly, to the point it hurt. “How much apologizing do you think Nelina had to do after her guitarist ran away right before our major debut? It ended up as a major loss for the band’s career. And after not getting in contact at all, Nelina suddenly finds out you started studying abroad in the UK. Just adjusting the schedule to come here to Bristol was so much work! We could have made a whole new album during this time!”

The reason I felt dizzy wasn’t because of the shoes I wore. Rather, her logic made perfect sense. And, I had no idea I was so foolish. I only thought of myself, not considering other people. The selfish one wasn’t Nelina, it was me.

“I’m sorry, Nelina-san. For all the trouble I caused.”

I apologized. Because that’s all I could do.

“That’s fine. Nelina isn’t angry. That’s the truth.”

Surprisingly enough, Nelina smiled. I could feel her grip on my arm getting weaker. She then ran her fingers along my arm. From my wrist to my elbow, onward to my shoulder. Even through my thick coat, I could feel her heat.

“Yoshi, you played for Nelina’s sake. And she’s thankful for that. But, that’s not good enough. You should know that the world isn’t so kind as to accept you if you don’t work hard. Nelina can’t obtain a world like this. If you don’t pour your soul into your music, you can’t reach the hearts of people.”

You have no soul. It felt like my music was being denied…and yet, they suddenly had a different ring to them than before.

“You’re the only one who understood, Yoshi. You didn’t laugh. Without Yoshi, Nelina can’t believe herself. She doesn’t see herself being able to do it. That’s why she came all the way here to bring you back.”

The hand she had placed on my shoulder slowly moved down my back. The ice beneath my feet melted, as I slid towards Nelina.

“What do you want, Yoshi? What do you want to obtain? For what reason…do you make music?”

I could feel the warmth rise around me despite the cold air. It was like a furnace was right in front of me, my face felt hot. Before I realized it, Nelina had embraced me. Our bodies overlapped. I could feel her hands on my back, wishing that she couldn’t hear my racing heart. She then raised her head, looking up at me. The passion in her black eyes could even melt the white ice.

“If you want Nelina…then you can have her. From the hair on her head…to the inside of her stomach. You can have it all.”

Her voice entered my body. Sweet and passionate as always.

“That’s why…give yourself to Nelina. She wants your music…No, your soul.”

Right now, she is within my grasp. It’s so easy to make her mine. I just have to nod. But…even so.

“Yoshi, you can do it.”

Despite that…I’m still possessed by the Ghost.

*

The announcement came for the skating rink to close shop, right after that conversion. Nelina just silently pulled my head toward the tent with the reception. We took off our shoes and stood in the center of Millenium Square again. I looked up at the silver globe that stood tall there. They had set up a planetarium inside, I’ve heard. And the surface of it was so clean, it turned into a mirror that reflected Nelina and me. I could feel the will burning in my head slowly cooling down. And at the same time, a certain thought passed through my brain. Nelina’s feelings definitely reached me. But…I took her hand.

“Huh? Yoshi?”

I pulled her along as I started walking. We made it past the science museum, crossing Anchor Road. There was something that I needed to show her. I walked through the brick way and then stood in the back of Lower Ram Street. In front of us was graffiti that was pierced and shredded by lightning.

“There’s one thing I’d like to ask you.”

“What is it? If it’s about Nelina’s plans after this, she’s got time until tomorrow noon.”

“This [Z] here…It was you who did it, right?”

For the first time since coming to Bristol, Nelina had a surprised expression on her face.

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t play dumb. You ripped Boo-san’s graffiti apart with a high-pressure washer and created this [Z] shape, didn’t you?”

“Come again? What’s the doodle stray cat got to do with this?”

“It’s not just that.”

I swear…Why did it take me so long to realize?

“You can speak English, right?”

Hearing me speak, her eyes opened wide and she smiled. Her body bent as she laughed so loud, her voice sounded like it would break. Finally, she wiped her tears away with her index finger. And then, she spoke up with a pronunciation that sounded close to a native speaker’s.

“…How did you know?”

Her dampened eyes from before had vanished. She now glared at me with the sharp gaze of a cautious fox.

“Awww, man. I thought it was perfect.” She continued by speaking English, and I responded in fashion.

“The work of [Z] in the Bearpit was done by JF-san. However, he only injured the graffiti by the people from Queen Bear’s Revenge. And he must know that this graffiti here belongs to Boo-san. There’s no way he wouldn’t know.”

What first caught my attention was JF’s statement: He pretended to be [Z]. I didn’t give it much thought at the time, but the way he phrased that made it clear that [Z] existed before he started his own work. And with only one other graffiti having suffered from [Z], it was clear that something didn’t sit right.

“Sure, it could have been someone completely unrelated who just did it on a whim. However, it’s not written in a palace that stands out too much. And unlike the regular spray, a high-pressure washer isn’t something you can just carry around all day. That’s why it’s valid to assume someone targeted this especially.”

“Oh, geez. There’s no way Nelina would know about some graffiti.”

“Not quite. Aeon-san is the one who showed you around, and he said he showed you the Ghost’s graffiti. And then, it’s more than plausible that he told you about the Ghost’s true identity.”

“Even if that may be true, there’s no way Nelina would have such a thing on her. She’s traveling, remember?”

“I think it’s the opposite.”

“That makes no sense.”

“You didn’t bring a pressure washer to write the [Z]. Instead, there just happened to be a pressure washer in the near vicinity, which is why it ended up like this. You stayed at a private residence, right? Then it wouldn’t be weird for them to have a pressure washer lying around. You saw that and remembered Boo-san’s graffiti. You wanted to hurt her. Isn’t that right?”

Nelina grinned, which acted as a silent affirmation.

“Were you always this smart?”

“I went through a lot.”

The Graffiti Detective—It’s not a name I deserve. But as the assistant of such, I have seen many things with Boudicia by my side. That’s why I could arrive at this conclusion.

“But how did you figure out that Nelina could speak English?”

“The small things stood out to me. When we were talking to Gabriel for the first time, the color of your expression changed before I could even translate anything. That was one thing that made me dubious.”

“Nelina thought that you’d look after her more if she pretended to be clueless. Did that work?”

“…I’m embarrassed that I fell for that.”

“Also, Nelina’s getting close to actually selling her own music, so there’s no way she wouldn’t be able to speak English, you know?”

“All the songs we played so far have been Japanese, that’s why…No, that doesn’t matter anyway.”

There’s only one reason why I would drag Nelina all the way here.

“Apologize.”

“Huuuuuuh?”

Her groan made it clear she didn’t understand what I just said. On our way here, I actually contacted Boudicia with my phone.

“Boo-san will come here soon. Let’s apologize together, okay?”

“That makes no sense. Why would Nelina have to apologize to that poor kitty?” Nelina’s expression grew twisted.

It felt like I could see her true face beneath all the facades.

“Because you destroyed her hard work.”

“Just overwrite it, then. Nelina knows how that works with graffiti.”

“When overwriting something, it has to be much more complicated than the previous work, or it has to look even better. That’s the unwritten rule of graffiti.”

“The hell? Nelina isn’t a graffiti writer, though. Why would she have to abide by some weird rules that don’t concern her?”

“That’s…”

“Also, why are you this angry, anyway? To you, this does not matter, right?”

Those words stabbed me deep inside my chest. This definitely is Boudicia’s problem. Why am I so desperately trying to unveil the identity of [Z] anyway? It doesn’t have anything to do with me. I’m not a citizen here in Bristol. I’m not a graffiti writer. And…Boudicia and I aren’t…

“Yes, it does.”

But then…I heard the roar of the lion.

“…!”

Seeing her arrival, Nelina let out a faint groan.

“I said it does matter, fox. But to think you turned out to be [Z], eh?” Boudicia stepped between me and Nelina. “And you can even speak English? Good, good, that means all the insults I threw at you so far definitely reached you!”

“Annoying…Annoying, annoying, annoying! Nelina absolutely despises you! Unforgivable! Why do you keep getting in Nelina’s way? I was this close!”

“Hah, you sound like a villain!”

“You’re the true villain. Because Yoshi’s princess…No, Nelina is the prince who saved Yoshi!”

I didn’t even have any time to get between them, as Nelina tried to grab Boudicia’s collar, but she evaded that and brushed the approaching hand away.

“You’ve been pissing me off this entire time. And if you’re gonna be like this…then I have no more reason to hold back.” Boudicia snorted. “I told you, right? That I’d be bringing the shotgun next time.”

And then, Boudicia readied her fists. She had her right hand near her jaw and her left hand straight ahead. She jumped up lightly several times, gently stopping the impact with her knees. And from beneath her cap, she glared at her opponent. It was a perfect boxer’s stature.

“Seems like you won’t get it if Nelina doesn’t give you a beating.” Nelina sighed and then lowered her hip.

She opened her left hand, placing her right hand below her chest.

“Heh, haven’t done this in a while since I started graffiti. My blood is boiling.”

“You shouldn’t underestimate the self-defense anti-sexual harassment karate that Nelina learned.”

One touch and everything would explode.

“That’s clearly not something you should be using for a street fight like this, Nelina-san!”

“This isn’t a fight. It’s a duel between Nelina and that woman. Isn’t that right, kitty?”

“See. You really get it, bloody fox.”

The moment I called Boudicia over, I had a feeling that things wouldn’t end peacefully. I had prepared myself for a harsh argument, but throwing fists like this was outside my range of expectations. This…what is this? It’s a fistfight.

“Please calm down, you two. I didn’t get you two to meet for this…”

“You step back!”

“You be quiet, Yoshi!”

Their voices overlapped. Why do they have to be in sync during the worst times? And then, the place was wrapped in silence. The two beasts were glaring at each other. Space, time, and the air stretched out endlessly. Then the thread ripped, and the limit arrived. Like vibrations stretching through space, the two closed in on each other. The first one to attack was Boudicia. She stepped into Nelina’s range with a sharp jab, but Nelina dodged that with a step to the side, taking her distance.

“Why are you even writing on a wall, anyway?”

Now, it was Nelina’s turn. She pretended to go in for Boudicia’s face, only to sweep in deeper and push her fist toward Boudicia’s stomach.

“To win, of course!”

Boudicia lowered her right arm to stop this attack as she answered. She tried to swing her other arm at Nelina’s open face, but a twist of the neck made his attack meet empty air.

“You won’t get anything from that!”

“So what’s the big deal if I have nothing to gain from that?!”

“Because it’s bad! Why…How can you be so free?”

“Free? Me?”

“How much work do you think Nelina has put in to blow up as an artist?! How much she sacrificed! How much of her soul she gave away?!” Nelina stepped in closer, as she threw several jabs at Boudicia, who blocked this with her guard.

And as if she had been waiting for that, she rammed one attack right into Boudicia’s solar plexus.

“Ugh…” Boudicia groaned as the air left her lungs.

However, her eyes were still burning.

“…You make it sound like you’re the only one who’s suffering…And I hate people like you the most!”

Boudicia created a faint with her right shoulder, which was read by Nelina. A left straight attack followed.

“You must have it nice. Writing on walls as you please, calling yourself an artist. You get no complaints from your producer, not having to worry if you don’t sell an album!”

Receiving another counter, Boudicia’s body shook. And Nelina didn’t miss out on that.

“Achievements, popularity…you don’t need a damn thing! And yet, everyone in Bristol knows you! They respect you! That pisses Nelina off the most!”

“If you’re so jealous about it, then go write some graffiti yourself!”

Met with a storm of attacks, Boudicia was busy just trying to evade and block.

“Don’t make fun of Nelina! She understands that all too well! She’s forced to flirt with men and women, even older farts, all so that she can make music that will sell!”

“You…”

More jabs followed by Nelina. Boudicia narrowed her body to put up her guard, but Nelina didn’t show any opening.

“You have everything! Yet, you don’t have to become anything. How…How can you even say that while having everything you need?!”

However, these attacks couldn’t continue forever. When Nelina had run out of stamina, Boudicia’s eyes lit up. She quickly lowered her upper body and stepped into Nelina’s range, going for Nelina’s jaw.

“Nelina wants everything…but she can’t have a damn thing…”

Or so it should have been, but Boudicia didn’t realize that Nelina had pulled her right leg back.

“…So give Yoshi back!”

As a result, Nelina’s knee stabbed right into Boudicia’s stomach. It was a strike with all her might. Speed and power turned into energy that was fired back at Boudicia. However, even that attack didn’t phase her. Her face twisted in pain, but she held onto Nelina’s leg, not letting go.

“Wha…”

Losing her balance, Nelina fell backward, and so did Boudicia. Nelina’s hair spread on the ground like a spider net, as Boudicia’s cap fell off her head. But thanks to this, she sat on top of Nelina. And then, the two glared at each other.

“…I’m actually right-handed.”

While standing up, Boudicia grabbed her right wrist.

“Nelina knew that. Your movement tells me enough. What about it?” Nelina put her hands on the ground, pushing up her upper body.

Instead of answering, Boudicia pushed up the sleeve of her hoodie.

“That’s…!”

This, in return, revealed the scar on her arm. It’s the same painful-looking scar I’ve seen a few times so far. The remains of the blade that stole her right arm from her.

“Look. I can’t use this one anymore.”

“Nelina felt that your movement was odd…But because of this…! Yet, you’re writing graffiti, right…?”

Nelina put her hand on her own throat. She probably imagined what would happen if her throat became unusable. She’s a musician. She’s using her own body to express herself, so in that way, she wasn’t much different from a graffiti writer. So, Nelina should understand the pain Boudicia must feel at losing her one way to express herself.

“Yeah. That’s why I thought of quitting graffiti altogether.”

While she said so, Boudicia approached me, placed her hand on my shoulder, and pulled me closer.

“But…Thanks to this guy, I decided to try.”

“Boo-san…”

“So, let me ask you. Do you know why Yoshi couldn’t play the guitar anymore?”

“Huh…?”

“Because of what you said. You created a scar deep within Yoshi, just like I have on my arm. Right in his heart…No, his soul.”

Nelina sat on the floor, looking at me and then back at Boudicia.

“Even so, he played for my sake. And…well, a lot happened, and he even got stabbed with a knife at some point. One wrong step and he could’ve lost his ability to play the guitar. Still, he did it to protect me.”

“Yoshi…is that true?”

I silently nodded.

“That’s why I decided to write again. Because I couldn’t lose against him. And what came from all that…was this graffiti. The one you erased, that is.”

The more Nelina listened, the redder her face became. Of course, it’s not her fault that she didn’t know. The fault lies with me because I didn’t tell her. Because she’d give me an earful? No, even simpler than that…It’s because I didn’t want her to worry. I wanted her to think I was doing okay, even after I ran away.

“…But, I didn’t know that you were hurting, too. You were fighting, huh? Even…by sacrificing your own soul.” Boudicia approached Nelina, offering her left hand. “Sorry about that.”

Nelina blinked in confusion. And after looking at Boudicia’s face, she took that hand and stood up.

“I thought I didn’t need a thing. Popularity, fame, money…I never thought about that. But, I found something I didn’t want to lose. Something I wanted for myself. And talking to you, fox, I realized that.”

Boudicia’s voice was the exact opposite of before. Calm, yet comforting.

“What about you? If you really get everything you want. What’s on your list next, then?”

“I…”

Nelina lowered her face, like a child who was trying to solve a difficult question in school. And I realized that this was the first time she actually spoke of herself in the first person. I’ve always heard rumors about her. Nelina is a genius. Nelina is arrogant. Nelina is…Nelina is…Nelina is…Maybe these rumors led to her watching herself from an outsider’s perspective. If so, then maybe this was the first time she actually spoke of herself as a single artist. Ready to treat herself like an artist.

“…I want things to go my way. I want to make music that I can be proud of and believe in. I want the whole world to listen to it. And for that…for that, I will…”

“Then we’re the same. You and I.”

Nelina’s face shot up, as Boudicia smiled. Their souls were speaking directly with each other.

“Nelina-san, I’m sorry.” I lowered my head to her. “I only thought of myself. Thank you for coming to Bristol to look for me.”

Nelina stood up and crossed her arms, looking away with a grumpy face. But I knew that she wasn’t actually as annoyed as she made it out to be. But I let her be for a moment and turned towards Boudicia next.

“And Boo-san, I’m sorry.”

“Why are you apologizing?”

“This whole fight happened because I called you here…No, if I hadn’t come to Bristol, everything would have been fine.”

“The hell are you on about? If you hadn’t come to Bristol…I sure as heck wouldn’t even be here anymore.”

That’s right. This is the place we first met…without even knowing at first. She wanted to erase her own graffiti and then leave Bristol behind. Fate and destiny always go hand-in-hand, unable to be undone.

“…I won’t apologize!” Nelina said as she pouted. “Yoshi stopped playing because of Nelina…and he could play again thanks to you? Nelina won’t accept that. On Christmas day, Nelina will win and take back Yoshi!”

I couldn’t help but smirk. My own opinion was once again disregarded as always. Meanwhile, Boudicia looked up at her own graffiti, and the letter engraved into it thanks to Nelina’s actions. The method to overwrite this piece…shone brightly in her eyes.

“I’ve decided. I’ll get on Lara’s boat and write. I’m not letting you do as you please any longer than this!” Boudicia declared as she pointed at Nelina like she was about to declare war.

Her smile reminded me of a clear winter sky. And of course, I knew what she would be saying next.

“Yoshi, what are you gonna do?” She asked with a serious voice.

Now it was my turn to decide.

“On Christmas day, you gotta hop on one boat, right?”

“I…”

Boudicia and Nelina—A lion and fox—Ghost and Fairy—Their two souls went on different paths. And I…

“I don’t know which is right or wrong.”

Granted, graffiti could cause harm and damage. But that doesn’t mean I think graffiti as a whole should disappear.

“Wanting to do something…having music I want to create…I don’t really have any goals like this.”

Nelina said I have no soul. Gabriel said I’m empty. Right now, I can accept what they said. They’re both right. If I play with Nelina, it turns into her music. If I play with Gabriel, it turns into his music. But even so…

“I’m a guitarist.”

I am an instrument.

“If Boo-san is going to write, then I will play. If not, I won’t be able to face you with my head held high.”

Because… instruments have something only instruments can do.

“But you know what’s coming, right? If you lose, you gotta scramble. And then…you’ll go back to Japan, right?”

“Yes, I’m prepared for that.”

“I see…If you’ve decided on that, then I got nothing else to say.”

Boudicia was probably all alone. But, that wasn’t all bad, still. Because she knew that people had to abide by their souls, even if it meant being all by themselves. I bent down to grab the cap that had flown off her head before and handed it to her.

“Boo-san, see you later.”

“Yeah. Let’s meet again after a while.” She put on the cap and walked away.

After I saw her off, Nelina quietly called my name.

“Hey, Yoshi.”

“Yes?”

“I want to win.”

Even after Boudicia had disappeared, Nelina continued to stare at the place she just stood.

“And if I need to, I won’t hesitate to hurt you. If I think you have no soul, then I’ll say that.”

I see. I always thought that, deep down, she was just anxious and worried. But even beyond that facade…she was a wild beast with a fire burning in her eyes. In that way, the two really resemble each other. I closed my eyes and smiled.

“I think…I really changed.”

“What do you mean?”

“Right now, I realize that there are things more important than not getting hurt or protecting myself. And it was Boo-san who taught me that.”

Before coming to Bristol…before learning about graffiti…and before I met Boudicia…I was different from now.

“I won’t run away. No matter what.”

Nelina heard my words and snorted arrogantly.

“Then let’s show that poor kitty what happens if you look down on us!”

*

I am an instrument. And instruments have things only they can do. What is it that, at this moment, I can accomplish? I remembered Aeon’s words. A middle way. An option. Conflict. Maybe Aeon knew that this would happen? Maybe he was aware of the role I had received…Or, the role I had been given. Either way, it doesn’t change a thing. Right now, there were two options in my path that I could choose from.

*

I headed to [The Ark]. My goal was simple. I wanted to meet Gabriel and talk to him. When I stepped onto the boat, Gabriel sat at the same table as the last time we talked. The only difference is that he was drawing right now. The way he was wearing these glasses now made him almost look defenseless in a way.

“Yoshi, what can I do for you?”

Gabriel saw me, placed his book on the table, and took off his glasses. The title of the book was “Republic,” written by Platon.

“Gabriel-san, I wanted to talk about the live concert on Christmas.”

He audibly sighed, leaned against the sofa, and tapped on the table.

“Personally, I would rather not listen to what you have to say…But you hold the right to do so, so let me hear it.”

To me, it was less than a right, and more of a duty. I mustered up as much courage as I had and spoke up.

“Can’t we stop this?”

“What do you mean?” Gabriel narrowed his eyes.

But I vowed to not let him threaten me and continued.

“I’m not saying that we should stop the live concert. However, I don’t see any reason for this war. The loser has to leave and never return…can’t we forget about that?”

Gabriel grabbed the book and stared at the cover, mumbling to himself.

“This question brings another with it. Or rather, this might just be the true question that’s on your mind.”

Ask one thing and he’ll figure out ten things. That’s how Gabriel operated. And since I stayed silent, this acted as affirmation.

“You want me to accept the value of graffiti?”

“No, not at all.”

“Then what is it?”

“I talked to Nelina-san. You were right. Even though we played together this whole time, I didn’t understand a thing about her.”

“…She is hungry, yes. However, she is not stubborn. At first, I thought of her as selfish. But this pride of hers acted simply as self-affirmation. That’s why she has no hesitation to change herself.”

“I agree.”

What I realized after spending so much time with her, Gabriel had already seen a way ahead of me. And his next words truly surprised me.

“She came to talk to me. She said that she needs you and that she wants to get you back. That’s why she wants to perform with you, and she will do whatever it takes.” Gabriel laughed at his own words.

“Whatever it takes, right? I’ve never seen a musician with such a fierce gaze.” He quietly placed the book down on the table again. “And I told her the same thing as I said to you. To become an instrument. I didn’t expect much, but she greatly surpassed my expectations.” He looked up at the ceiling. “Two whole weeks, you know. She would come first thing in the morning, sing her heart out, listen to all my advice, and sing again. The day went by like this, and she came again early in the morning. For almost 168 hours, she would sing. When I was busy eating or making songs, she worked on her own homework and continued to sing. Any normal person would have had their throat ruined by this. It’s her physical strength and determination that brought her through this.”

“I had no idea…”

I was thinking that something was off about Nelina and her voice. But to think this was because of excessive practice…

“Because of this effort, her singing reached the direction and level I sought. That’s all there is to it.”

Gabriel doesn’t work based on emotions. This became clear through this conversation. He lives as he speaks. Maybe he just cut himself free from these emotions. But then what even is important to him?

“Nelina-san said she made music to obtain what she wanted…But, Gabriel-san, why do you make music?”

His eyes opened faintly.

“…A good question, indeed. I’m almost a bit surprised.”

He leaned forward, approaching my face.

“I love beautiful music. True music, which isn’t stored on vinyl or as digital data. Something that is carved into the soul. Something you can remember at any given moment. Something that turns into the hope to live on. I want the citizens here to experience this kind of hope…this kind of music. Does that answer your question, Yoshi?”

Deep within his eyes, I failed yet again to read any emotion. But, there was something burning strong—An ideal. And for a tiny bit, it felt like I could understand who he was as a person.

“I’m glad I asked. So, Gabriel-san, let me proceed once more…Can’t we stop fighting?”

“No can do. Graffiti is wrong. That is the truth.”

“But they’ll write on an abandoned boat. And they have permission from the owner…”

“The target and surface do not matter. Permission or not won’t change my opinion. As long as this culture exists, any graffiti is vandalism. The destruction of the town does not stop. Isn’t that right?”

Once again, he is right. Granted, this was legally acceptable and nobody was getting hurt…But it was an isolated example. The counterargument that beautiful graffiti can be considered art is already out of the question. Because through the passage of time and corrosion, graffiti can never withstand the ages. As long as graffiti is considered the culture of the street, it’s impossible to differentiate between “good” and “bad” graffiti. And Gabriel knew that. But even so, there was something I had to tell him.

“I won’t participate in your music to erase graffiti. And I won’t do it for my friends. I don’t want to play music in order to deny something. Is that okay with you?”

Gabriel’s eyes opened wide, as he smiled with a somewhat exhausted expression.

“You really are serious. You already know the answer to that, don’t you?”

“Thank you very much.”

In the end, it still didn’t go as I wished it to. But, I had expected this result. I told myself that this was the best possible end and stood up.

“Yoshi.”

“Yes?”

Gabriel stopped me once, and I turned around.

“…I’m looking forward to Christmas.”

Usually, his voice was devoid of emotion. However, I could pick up a faint amount of excitement, sweet like chocolate. The first point on my agenda may have ended in failure, but there was something else I had to do. Or rather, someone I had to meet. I stood in front of the hospital room, slowly opening the door. Familiar and long bluish-green hair filled the bed.

“…Oh dear. What a surprise,” she said and formed a smile with her pale lips.