Book Three Chapter Ninety Four: Credits
Despite the fact that her pet was actively working to shove the Evil Emperor into the Chosen Ones backpack, Qube felt her heart melt with love. Not just towards her very enthusiastic mascot, but she was also flooded with warm feelings for Definitely Bad Guy, the Mage whod just encouraged her to eat a man.
When everyone else had been telling Squiggles no, and only made the stubborn sharktopus dig in harder in her determination to snack on the tyrant, Definitely Bad Guy had deliberately played along with Squiggles, which caused her to drop her defensive walls. Only then had he pointed out the potential repercussions of her actions.
He was possibly the only one of the party who could have even thought of using such a tactic, and hed pulled it off flawlessly. If Squiggles had noticed his reverse psychology, she would have immediately ignored him. It was only because of his reputation for research over everything that hed been able to get through to her.
And it was only because of how Squiggles had grown in intelligence that shed been able to understand, and let go of her selfish desire to eat a man.
Qube smiled mistily at the Mage, who was watching the pocket abuse proceedings with interest. As if sensing her attention he glanced up and, when he saw she was looking at him, hurriedly returned to watching the struggle before him.
It never even occurred to Qube that, rather than his words being a cover for attempting to gently dissuade Squiggles, Definitely Bad Guy might have been utterly serious in his statements.
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After all their discussion, it was surprisingly easy to stuff the Evil Emperor into a backpack. While she still wasnt sure how Squiggles had managed it, shed somehow contorted the large, imposing figure into the pocket dimension. After a few seconds Qube had been forced to look away. Something about the sight of it made her head hurt.
Sencha Bard also looked away, his face rather pale, but the other three watched the event with avid interest.
I dont know if this is going to work, the Chosen One was keeping a running commentary the entire time. After all, it might have to think hes dead. Oh, that leg is getting right in there. Squiggles, youre surprisingly good at this, when you ascend you could get a job packing things. I dont know if youre supposed to twist his hips like that.
Finally, the tyrant was in the bag.
Well, thats going to appear in my nightmares, the Chosen One said casually, finishing his narration.
Why did you keep watching then? Qube asked, exasperated. Shed ended up covering her ears for a bit to drown out the series of popping noises that sounded far too much like things being dislocated.
It was interesting! the Chosen One replied cheerfully. He scanned the room. I dont see any Save Points, though, but maybe we can open the doors now?
But the doors remained closed. There was an odd grinding sensation inside Qubes head as the world seemed to blur. A strange sensation, like the entire world was staring into her very self, tore through her, leaving her gasping for breath.
She was being torn apart. The section of her that was Once Adored bound even tighter to her, clinging against the forces that ravaged her very sense of being with their gaze. She held onto it with everything she was.
The background music, which was so prevalent that she mostly ignored it, suddenly blasted in her mental ears.
Is it a battle? she asked, looking around wildly. There were no signs of any enemies but the song was so loud and triumphant, it felt like a whole horde must be coming. Had hiding away the Evil Emperor caused his minions to attack them? Or the Royal Guards? They hadnt appeared at all in the castle; was this their time to strike?The source of this content nov(el)bi((n))
As she searched, the world grew blurrier and blurrier, and strange symbols began to form in the air.
Wait, are these credits? The Chosen One sounded horrified. Why do they even have those? Its not like this is going anywhere anytime soon.
What are credits? Qube asked, doing her best to sound tranquil about the fact that words were now hanging in the air. Some of them, which looked like names, were repeated multiple times. They didnt seem to be doing anything, just appearing next to random objects like the throne, then fading away. The name Alex appeared directly in front of her.
Those were Dev names!
Hang on, hang on, is it auto-saving? It cant do that! It hasnt auto-saved the entire time; why are they busting it out now? The horror in the Chosen Ones voice deepened until he sounded almost afraid. They cant do that!
Whats auto-saving? Qube asked, holding fast to her rapidly-disappearing calmness.
What about the chaos versus order plotline? The Chosen One was so distressed by whatever was happening that he neglected to explain to his companions what was actually happening. What was the point of the whole setup if it wasnt going to pay off? Theyre not even going to give us a sequence with either the King or Queen? Thats insane! Thats not how youre supposed to end things!
Chosen One! Qube shouted. Startled, he snapped out of his state. What is going on? she demanded.
He strode over to her and gripped her shoulders. Up close, she could see the barely-suppressed panic in his face.
Papa, Squiggles said from somewhere in the darkness.
What kind of spell is this? Definitely Bad Guy murmured the question to himself.
The new queen ordered an investigation into the entire kingdom, and rooted out all criminal elements, ushering in a new age of prosperity for all leaders and their people.
The new king ordered an investigation into the entire kingdom, and rooted out all corrupt leaders, ushering in a new age of creativity for all the common people.
The fake Definitely Bad Guy and Sencha Bard were talking near-simultaneously, making it difficult to understand. In the distance, the paintings were shifting, one showing the Exiled Prince and the other showing the Exiled Princess sitting on the throne, and both showing them pointing at someone. In the Exiled Princes painting, he was pointing at the Dryad Queen in her Mother Gothel form. In the Exiled Princesss she was pointing at the Giant Lava Slime, who was looking very hungry.
Have they seriously just locked everyone into place and turned out the lights? The Chosen One was half-laughing, half-angry. This is the cheapest move ever. I guess I didnt need to freak out so hard back there, he said to Qube. Sorry about that.
I ascended the throne, and took my place as the new ruler of the Forbidden Forest, with my new Head Guard, Sexy Screamy Spider Briars oddly flat voice said from a new painting at the same time as she also said: I followed the Hero on his adventures, dedicating myself to our blossoming love.
Neither of those things are true, Sexy Screamy Spider Briar angrily retorted from the darkness.
Otto become head otter and get many clam clams for my tum tums! Ottos voice blared from a painting of him in the Water Temple.
Friend! Squiggles cried out happily.
Otto follow the Hero and make many friends! Otto said from another painting, showing him perched on the Chosen Ones shoulder.
I went on to become a renowned Bard, singing the saga of the Hero, beloved by the people, the Sencha Bard impersonator said from a painting showing him surrounded by adoring fans. I went on to become a renowned Rogue, working on behalf of the Hero, feared by the people, the Sencha Bard echo said at the same time from a painting of him emerging from the shadows, his beautiful hat gone.
I delved into my research, determined to discover the secrets of the universe, Definitely Bad Guys mimic said. Until one day, I opened a doorway, and was lost to this world. The painting his words came from showed him walking through a star-filled doorway, without any traces of blue tainting his redness.
I became advisor to the new Hero, and helped uncover many secrets thought lost during the Evil Emperors reign of terror, the Mage mimic overlapped himself from a painting showing him standing next to a throne, his eyes, hair, and robes shining an icy blue.
Having sacrificed his closest friend, the Hero returned to the revitalised village. While he was greeted by his loved ones, he couldnt help but wonder if hed done the right thing, the Exiled Princess said.
Having sacrificed his village, the Hero continued with his closest friend. While he wandered the streets of Cobbletown, he couldnt help but wonder if hed done the right thing, the Exiled Prince said.
One painting was of the village, full of life and colour again, the Hero walking amongst the people.
In the other, the Chosen One and Qube were walking around Cobbletown.
Both images made Qubes heart hurt.
Is the village revitalised or ruined? Qube asked, horrified and confused. It was hard to tell, what with them talking at the same time, but it seemed like she was both dead and alive.
None of this is real, the Chosen One said quietly to her. This is all just them wrapping up the narrative. Remember your promise. Please.
Although Qube found herself unable to move, she felt her body relax, just a little. The final two paintings faded away, returning them all to darkness.
Thank you, Hero. The world is saved thanks to your efforts! an unknown voice said.
Dont forget, the Chosen One whispered in her ear. We got this. Were gonna force them to recognise you all.
Two white words took shape where the paintings had been.
Game Over.
All sensation ceased.