Chapter 183: Whitefall XXXVIII
We stopped by the library to solidify the theory. Sera said little as I tracked down a blueprint for the Whitefall sewer system and cross-referenced it with the markings of vanished non-humans Kilvius had let me copy.
And while there were a few dots that didnt quite line up with the maze of large pipes that ran the length of the city, the vast majority did.
I was tempted to go straight to Cephur as soon as we were out of the library. But I was worried about Sera. Her crestfallen demeanor hadnt improved. I sent Alten to go check on Maya, both to remove him as an antagonizing element, and because I was concerned.
As a fighter, there was no question Maya could take care of herself. Shed proved it repeatedly during our time in the sanctum, and from everything Id seen and heard, shed advanced leaps and bounds beyond that. But no one was invincible. And if a powerful drephin shaman could be plucked out of the dungeons with no one noticing, it stood to reason that an infernal life mage could suffer the same fate.
We raided the noble wine cellar. Or rather, I raided it, while Sera waited outside, staring into the void.
When I returned with the plunder, she said nothing. Just followed in silence until we reached the stables.
Were not going riding, are we? Sera groused, looking over the well-maintained stalls with distaste.
She speaks! I said, trying to lighten the mood. When she didnt respond, merely crossing her arms, I sighed. Youre not the biggest proponent of riding, Im aware. So no. Were here because this is one of the rare few places we can relax outside of our rooms uninterrupted. And. I dunno. It looked like a good place to drink. I tossed her the wineskin.
Sera popped the wineskins cork almost mechanically, upending the skin and guzzling much of the contents. After she swallowed, she cocked her head, staring at the skin dumbly. That may just be the best wine Ive ever tasted.
I hid a smile. It was a decade old Cerillian red. And it was the best wine shed ever tasted. A fact I knew solely because shed told me herself, around two years from now. Consider it my thanks for keeping an open mind.
It wouldnt have mattered. Sera took another sip of wine and grimaced. You could have shoved me off the skyhold and I dont think he would have cared. Knew my standing wasnt much to speak of, but that was the first time he outright said it. Elphion, I think I gained more value by serving as your accessory than I have in the last fifteen years.
So, fuck him, I said.
Sera jolted, the haze of drink fading at my words. What the hells? She looked around. Stables cant be that private.
Fuck him, I enunciated clearly. Fuck King Gil. Fuck the king and the swayback pony he rode in on.
My sister looked slightly panicked. Her mouth firmed. If youre hellbent on committing treason, Im going to leave.
Its mild treason at worst. I shrugged. Seditious incitement at best. But fine, Ill stop.
She seemed to relax a little, now that Id stopped throwing obscenities at our not-present father and corked the wineskin, proffering it to me. I took a sip in solidarity, but kept it small. I had no intention of greeting my regiment for the first time drunk.
Youre not afraid of him. Sera shook her head. And Im not talking about cursing his name. He was putting a blazing iron to you and you kept your wits. Lied straight to his face. No hesitation. Then theres meshe raised the skin in a melancholy cheersfolding like a wet rag at the first mild pressure.
I scoffed as she tipped the skin to her lips. Nothing about that was mild. Andmaybe it doesnt seem this waybut Im still scared of him. Therere just others I fear more.
The arch-mage. Sera frowned.
Oh, yes. Ozras demonic visage came to me. And a couple more. Its not that Im unafraid. More that the range of my fear has expanded.
Was she the one who hurt you? Sera asked.
I shook my head. Demons.
Sera didnt seem to know how to engage with that, so she left it alone. There was a time I believed the arch-mage was a fabrication. Some fictional enemy invented to provide an excuse for you to take off and do whatever you want.
If only it was that simple.
Now half the kingdom is up in arms about her. Sera rubbed her face. Elphion, you were off fighting a proxy war against an enemy greater than our father has ever faced, being tortured by demons, while I was here accomplishing nothing, hating you for going on what I assumed to be frolicking adventures.
Sister, I said, trying to think of the best way to word this, I can say, confidently, without a single doubt in my mind, that you would have done far better in my stead.
And then you do that, Sera growled. Acknowledge me. Compliment my abilities. Put your own goals at risk to intercede on my behalf. Its like youre a whole different person.
What do you mean
You had me with the regiment! Sera exploded, her face twisting in frustration. Somehow you knew. Its all Ive ever wanted. Not to rule, not to be a gods damned princess, just, to be recognized on my own merits. Given a real chance to prove myself. You had me. It was the perfect bait, and I swallowed it, hook and all. Her voice caught. When father started hounding me, all you needed to do was stay silent, wait it out. But you just jumped in. Like keeping his favor meant nothing to you.
Well. That was honest, I said.
Now that I had the full picture, I could understand why Cephurs reaction was so volatile. From the first day Id met him in the Everwood, hed struck me as a good leader. The kind that placed the wellbeing of those in his charge first, even at his own peril.
That, along with the way hed given his life to save mine before Id died and time reverted, was why Id chosen him.
And now I was asking him to do something that conflicted with those ideals.
I need some air, Sera said. And without fanfare she let herself out and closed the door behind her.
Cephur visibly relaxed in her absence. His eyes remained on the exit, and he leaned back, crossing his boots one over the other on the desk. Well. Might have gone worse. She could have tried to have me executed.
Yes, she really could have. I put my face in my hands and rubbed my eyes. The lack of sleep from the previous night was catching up with me. And I was concerned by the reaction, or rather, the lack of it. That Sera hadnt threatened him or even risen to Cephurs level, spoke volumes to how lost she was.
Alright. Fine. Ill bite. Whys she so important to you?
Shes my sister.
Aint your only one, Cephur said thoughtfully. A gilded pen spun idly in his fingers. And from all accounts, the others easier to get along with by a country mile. Yet you put special emphasis on her back then too, asked Tamara to get close to her, right before you sent us on our way. His face twinged in guilt. I dont want to seem ungrateful. We appreciate everything you done for us, Tamara and I.
You dont seem ungrateful, I said, slouching in the chair until my head touched the cushion. And the fact that I smoothed the path before you doesnt make you beholden to my every whim.
Yeah, Cephur smiled. You were always like that.
I stared at the off-white tiling of the officers quarters. You remember my vision? The far-reaching one?
Not the sort of thing a fellow forgets.
Well, in that vision, Sera betrayed me.
Cephur was quiet. I could almost hear him thinking, and that led you to want to give her command of one of your banners why?
It was my fault, I finally said. I let our father drive a wedge between us. And despite knowing it was there, understanding that he was manipulating us to compete, I just didnt bother trying to fix it. I didnt like her. To me, she was too arrogant, too judgmental to bother wasting time on. So was I, but a mirror reflecting ones self rarely lends clarity.
And involving her in your military endeavors is a method of righting past wrongs? Cephur asked.
Yes, and no. I hesitated. Theres no doubt in my mind shed make for an excellent lieutenant. Soldiers in particular love her. Shes rough and tumble, not above getting dirty. Theyve always appreciated that. But yes, guilt plays a role.
Cephur drummed his fingers on the desk, his mouth tight. I feel for you, kid. Really do. But I have a responsibility to this regiment.
I understand.
And Im speaking from experience when I say foundation is the most important part. Guess thats true of any relationship. He leveled a gaze at me. But especially for a regiment. Morale can be a killer, if it gets out of control. I do mean that literally. And unfortunately, with these folk in particular, your noble status doesnt carry much weight. A little. But not much. Especially if you bring a tagalong who hasnt earned her stripes. Theyll eat you alive.
I shook my head. Theres no way you can think that both of us could prove ourselves at the same time?
Cephur sighed. Not really. You might hold more pull with the infernals on account of the dimension gate, but short of the two of you doing something approaching legend status? Such as taking on the entire regiment and winning? Nah.
Huh I said, noncommittally.
No. No. Cephur leaned forward, eyebrows furrowed in concern. That wasnt meant to be an actual suggestion.
I said nothing.
Uh-huh. But Ive seen that look before. Usually before some manner of dog-fuckery is about to ensue. Even if you could use that magic of yours to cheat your way through the entire regimentwhich you couldnt. Theyd see it as just that. Cheatin.
That made sense. If I was a soldier, and my new commander set the entire barracks on fire as a method of instilling my respect, I wouldnt respect him much either. I smiled. So what youre saying is wed need to beat them in the proper way. A way theyd respect.
No ones that good, kid, Cephur warned. Not even you. And Elphion, even if you managed that major miracleand it would be a major miracleitd crush morale.
Just let me think about it for a while, I said.