Volume 4, Chapter 39 [Friendt]
[Otto: What, what’s with that bewildered face like you just saw something mind-bogglingly unbelievable at the end of a dream and now your brain’s melting]
[Subaru: ......That’s, an exaggerated way of putting it but there’s no need to correct anything so let’s just say it’s something like that]
Otto sighed, resting both his hands on his hips, and Subaru, turning his wrists confirming that his hands were free, dropped onto the floor looking back up at Otto.
After all, having been tied up for over three days, just moving his body made it creak and ache. Since it was so difficult to turn over in that tied up position, he had only been periodically flipped at mealtimes. But, it was more than just a problem with blood circulation, as he was starting to notice other defects. Namely,
[Subaru: Otto, this might just be because I just took the blindfold off, but...... my right eye’s not seeing too well. Or, rather than not well... it’s more like it can’t see at all. What’s up with that?]
[Otto: What is up with it... if you ask me, I’m a bit hesitant to say as well...... I could put it more elegantly and sugarcoat it... or I could put it bluntly and say exactly what it is. Which would you prefer?]
[Subaru: Sugarcoat it so I don’t get shocked and tell me bluntly so I know what’s actually happening]
[Otto: That’s awfully greedy...... Uhhh, on the starboard-side of Natsuki-san’s auspicious visage, your vision had been inevitably shrouded in darkness, forever closed to light...]
[Subaru: Uh. I wasn’t asking for something that edgy but I think I get the point]
Hearing Otto’s dressed-up description of Subaru’s malaise, Subaru held out his hand and stopped the explanation halfway through. Then, putting his extended hand on his right eye, he carefully felt around to confirm it.
――The right side of his vision had felt as though it had been completely cut off, and no image was coming through. And once he touched it, Subaru understood why this organ was slacking on its job.
Or, rather than slacking, it was more like it had packed its bags and went home. Because all that was left where his right eye used to be, was an empty hole.
[Subaru: I thought...... he said I was healed]
[Otto: The bleeding was stopped and the broken bones were pieced together. But healing magic depends on the healer, and it isn’t omnipotent. ......Bringing dead parts back to life would be a bit...]
Otto mumbled, looking at Subaru with sympathy. Seeing that look, Subaru slackened his lips powerlessly and muttered [No helping it, I guess],
[Subaru: People usually die when their heads get crushed. So I think I’m ok with just losing one eye...... but if both my eyes died I think I’ll probably lose the will to live]
[Otto: That’s pretty optimistic... you aren’t going into despair, are you? Please don’t, I don’t know if we can go on without you, Natsuki-san]
For someone who had just lost an important organ like the right eye, Subaru was awfully calm, in a way that even surprised himself. Maybe the shock just hadn’t kicked in yet, or perhaps it was because, unlike losing the greater part of an arm during Elsa’s attack, this one wasn’t accompanied by gore and pain.
Even though Garfiel lied, it was still mostly true. He had halted the blood, sealed the wounds, and stopped the pain. It’d be expecting too much to think healing magic can heal anything, and he did save Subaru from an otherwise fatal wound just like he said he did.
[Subaru: Was he... upholding some kind of principle or what? I just can’t understand him, that guy]
He struck Subaru down when he was attacking Roswaal, but afterwards also healed him. And then he thought to imprison Subaru until the end of the Trials to guarantee Emilia’s cooperation.
He healed him so he wouldn’t die, and even took up the role of caretaker to see it through to the end. Though he loathed the Witch’s stench drifting from Subaru’s body, it didn’t stop him from coming back here. And even though he didn’t stop coming, he hadn’t asked Subaru a single vital question.
It was almost as though he knew Subaru wouldn’t say anything, or as if he already knew everything he needed to know, and so had no interest in what Subaru had to say.
[Subaru: If he does know, does that mean he has a Gospel......? How come everyone is...... or actually, seeing this is the Witch’s Experimental Ground, maybe it’s only natural]
If every key person possesses a book that tells the future and acts in accordance with its instructions, then shouldn’t this world progress in a way that’s much simpler for Subaru?
With everyone who is anyone working toward the same outcome, marching towards the same HAPPY END, for once, couldn’t things just play out in a single cozy path?
If there was truly a way to know the future, then it should have saved Subaru a long time ago from having to manually die and repeat and feel his way forward, shouldn’t it?
[Subaru: ......Complaining isn’t going to move things forward at all, and no one’s gonna come help me, damnit]
[Otto: That’s a depressing thing to say, Natsuki-san. Well, I can’t blame you, considering what you just went through...... but I am a bit offended by that “no one’s gonna help me” part. What did you think I’m doing here?]
Overhearing Subaru mutterings, Otto offered this sympathetic comment before rejecting what Subaru’s said at the end.
Seeing Otto’s smug-looking expression up close, Subaru’s face looked blank for a moment,
[Subaru: Ah, come to think of it, what are you doing here? I mean, really, for the last three or four days I’ve had time to think about loads of things, and I’m not exaggerating, but you were basically the only person who never crossed my mind]
[Otto: You’re unbelievable, you know that!! To think I’d still be surprised you’d say something like that at this point!!]
[Subaru: Honestly though, I’m the one surprised at how your existence just vanished from my head. The moment I saw you I wasn’t even sure if you were Otto or the appa-seller-uncle, you know]
[Otto: Who’s the appa-seller-uncle!?]
[Subaru: He was kind of a starting point for me. We could also call him MR.SAVEPOINT]
To date, in terms of Return by Death respawn points, Kadomon was probably the one who showed up the most.
Joking around as he remembered that scar-faced uncle, Subaru put an end to the sense of loss for his right eye and set his mind to analyze the abrupt change in the situation.
First, he better get some answers from Otto. And find out his true intentions.
[Subaru: Jokes and all that aside...... there’re some things I wanna to ask you]
[Otto: Well, that’s only to be expected. I’m also pretty interested to know what Natsuki-san did to get locked up in here]
[Subaru: ――? You mean, all this wasn’t on Roswaal’s orders?]
According to Garfiel, Subaru was supposed to be imprisoned for his act of violence against Roswaal. At the same time, his imprisonment was to be used as leverage to compel Emilia to take the Trials. But,
[Otto: I don’t know how much the Margrave is involved in all this. All I know is that right now a terrible rift is dividing the Sanctuary]
[Subaru: A rift? What do you mean?]
[Otto: It’s exactly what it sounds like. There’s Lewes-sama’s faction, which wants to free the refugees from the village along with Natsuki-san, and there’s the other faction firmly opposed to that. Ever since Natsuki-san got imprisoned by Garfiel, the debate has really gotten out of hand]
Otto gave a brief summary of what happened over the last few days with an exhausted expression on his face.
Just as Subaru feared, the friction between the refugees and the Sanctuary’s residents deepened, and the mounting displeasure had exploded into small-scaled conflicts. It seemed that the originally small cracks within the Sanctuary had split its population into factions, and the Sanctuary was now in a fractured state.
Swallowing a deep breath at the frightening situation, Subaru followed with [But],
[Subaru: Why did this happen so suddenly? From what I’ve seen...... I mean, I expected...]
In the first world, Subaru was here for over five days without seeing any of this kind of factionalism. In fact, Subaru’s proposal to release the refugees passed easily, and on the morning of the sixth day the agreement was realized.
But this time, the situation was deteriorating way too quickly. Seeing Subaru make this judgement, Otto shook his head and raised a finger, [Well, you see],
[Otto: It wasn’t sudden at all. In fact, Natsuki-san is one of the main reasons this happened, so if even you think it’s sudden then we’re really in trouble]
[Subaru: I’m... one of the reasons?]
[Otto: I don’t know what kind of relationship Natsuki-san has with the villagers of Arlam......but it must be a good one. Ever since you got attacked by Garfiel and went missing, the atmosphere in the Sanctuary has become the worst it’s ever been]
[Subaru:――――]
[Otto: To the villagers, Ram-san and the Margrave are in a position where they’d hesitate to voice their concerns to, but because they trust you, that makes you the ideal channel to pass their voices to the top. I’m not saying it’s the only reason, but I think it’s clear how furious everyone is]
Listening to Otto’s explanation, Subaru opened his mouth without uttering a word.
Certainly, when it comes to the differences in the situation in the Sanctuary between this loop and the previous one, Subaru’s well-being was definitely one of them. But Subaru never once imagined that his presence would have this kind of effect on the Arlam villagers’ feelings, much less trigger a rift inside the Sanctuary.
Suspiciously squinting his left eye at Otto, Subaru tried to check if he was joking or exaggerating, but Otto just furrowed his brows without showing any notable reaction in particular. In other words, he was probably being serious. Then, the only point of contention would be whether there was something wrong with Otto’s observational skills, but,
[Subaru: I don’t wanna bother piling up arguments to get the answer to that one, so]
[Otto: Why do I get the feeling I’m being treated improperly somehow. Ah, nevermind. Anyway, Natsuki-san, the reason I came here is related to that rift]
[Subaru: Related to the rift...... so, since things got messed up without me, you’re saying it’ll all return to normal once I go back? Well that’s just, kinda, expecting too much of me and putting way too much PRESSURE on me you know and......]
Bogged down by his own overly low self-esteem, Subaru still couldn’t take Otto’s words seriously. The truth is, even if Subaru had a powerful influence on calming the villager’s hearts, now that everything had already exploded, he doubted there was anything he could do.
In fact, if Subaru showed up now, missing a right eye, he’ll probably just be pouring oil onto the fire.
Seeing Subaru shaking his head with a difficult expression, Otto rejected his denial all over again with [No no],
[Otto: Of course I don’t think Natsuki-san has that kind of influence. That’d just be way too optimistic, you know]
Stopping his breath, Subaru waited for Otto’s answer. And, taking in Subaru’s question, Otto gazed back at Subaru in turn, as he chose his words,
[Otto: What kind of person do you think I am, Natsuki-san?]
[Subaru: Someone who’d reach for a penny in front of him while he drops all his belongings on the other hand...... I think that’s the kind of dopey character I have in mind]
[Otto: That’s a terrible way to think of me! Even though I admit I’ve done something like that before it’s still irritating to be thought of like that!!]
That really was Subaru’s impression of Otto――or, rather, it was the impression Subaru wanted to believe.
Protesting against that unacceptable evaluation, [Just, really], Otto gave a tired shake of his head,
[Otto: You know, Natsuki-san]
[Subaru: ......Yeah?]
[Otto: ――If I just wanted to help a friend, would that really be so strange?]
――For a moment, unable to understand what he just heard, Subaru’s time stopped.
It was several seconds later when time began to move again. But even as it moved, Subaru still couldn’t comprehend the meaning of those words. What did Otto say, just now?
Friendt? Who’s Friendt? Was there someone with that name around here?
[Otto: Wh-what’s with that face frozen in surprise all of a sudden!?]
[Subaru: No, I just suddenly heard the name of someone I didn’t know so I lost track of what you were saying. Who’s this Friendt-san supposed to be?]
[Otto: I don’t know what kind of conclusion you just reached but it’s completely wrong from head to tail! Not Friendt, friend! Like good friends!]
[Subaru: Good friends!? Who and who!?]
[Otto: Me! And Natsuki-san!]
Subaru’s eyes opened wide, staring at the out-of-breath Otto in disbelief. And Otto, stomping noisily on the floor, flapped his hands up and down, [Are you even listening?],
[Otto: When I was captured by the Witch Cult and my life was in danger, it was Natsuki-san who saved me. And there were all those things you said and did to help me after that. I may have come here in order to meet the Margrave, but that doesn’t mean my relationship with Natsuki-san is just one of convenience]
[Subaru: ――――]
[Otto: At the end of the day even without these troublesome things, I still think of Natuski-san as a friend. There may be all sorts of complaints I’d like to raise about my usual treatment, but don’t say such unreasonable, stupid things like we don’t know each other! So―]
Suddenly feeling embarrassed halfway through, Otto quickly scratched his nose and looked away. Subaru remained silent while listening to Otto’s words. And Otto, having reached the end of his speech, stared quizzically at Subaru’s lack of reaction.
There was a visible unease on his face, probably because Subaru hadn’t said anything to confirm what he said just now. It felt like a situation where someone just opened the door to a friendship sales-pitch.
Able to imagine what must be going through Otto’s mind, a certain emotion began to swell up in Subaru’s heart. And, the reaction brought about by that emotion was――
[Subaru: ――Pffff]
[Otto: Yes?]
[Subaru: Whuahahahaha! Fr-friends? We’re good friends! Aaah, is that’right is that’right. Otto, you, you want to be my friend!?]
[Otto: Whaa!?]
Unable to keep his laughter from blowing out, Subaru boorishly slapped the red-faced Otto on the shoulders. Still couldn’t stop himself, Subaru kept hugging his belly while stomping the floor.
[Subaru: Pffuahahaa, friends. Aaah, damn it. Otto, you bastard, you!]
[Otto: Ow! Ow! What’re you doing!? Yeah, I was stupid for saying it! I get it, Natsuki-san doesn’t see it that way. But even so, I’m pretty sure it’s not something that laughable!]
[Subaru: Nononono, I can’t stop laughing! I’m not laughing at you......my stupidity is too damn much I can’t help but laugh at myself]
Using his left hand to wipe away the tears from the explosive laughter, Subaru finally managed to get his urge to laugh under control and regained his composure. Then, he looked at Otto before him.
Otto looked like he painfully regretted mentioning the word “Friend”. But at this point, the only thing inside Subaru’s heart was appreciation, and inexpressible gratitude.
――What was Otto’s motivation? What could be hidden behind his mask?. What could be believed, and what couldn’t be?
Otto called Subaru his friend, and came to help him out of concern. And when he came, Subaru’s first thought was to doubt him rather than believe him, that was just how foolish he was.
Thinking that there must be something in it for him, “Something” malicious at play, that was just how petty Subaru was.
Having been tossed around by his circumstances, Subaru had lost sight of the feelings of the people around him, and, believing only in the existence of malice while forgetting the existence unconditional kindness, he had even forgotten what gratitude was.
――Did Natsuki Subaru know so much about the world, that he could just give up and throw it away?
After only these few loops of repeating the world through death, did he imagine that he was now enlightened? All the while, he didn’t even notice he had a true friend at his side.
Unaware of Subaru’s self-admonishment and deprecation, even more confusion floated onto Otto’s face. Seeing this, Subaru managed to form a smile, and suddenly drew in a cheerful breath,
[Subaru: I’m sorry. You are my friend, Otto. ――Thank you, for saving me]
※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※
The building where Garfiel had imprisoned him was secluded deep within the forest, far from the village where the people of the Sanctuary resided. If Otto wasn’t there to guide him, Subaru would have long lost way in the interwoven paths.
[Subaru: Thinking of it that way, we’d be pretty screwed without your Divine Protection, huh]
[Otto: Please keep your voice down. I don’t know the way either, so I’m trying to rely on the flowers and frogs and lizards right now. If we offend them, they could trick us or guide us off a cliff]
[Subaru: Nature’s creatures are scary!]
Otto carefully listened as he cautiously chose the path. While Subaru, following behind, ran perilously through the gaps between the trees, trying to get used to seeing with only one eye.
Natually, it was painful to lose his depth perception and the right half of his vision. The full-on feeling of loss would probably hit him later, on but it was doing its job hindering his movements rather effectively right now.
However, Subaru didn’t feel any resentment towards Garfiel for these injuries.
Considering what he himself had done, Subaru was aware that he had brought it upon himself. Besides, there was always something incomprehensible and contradictory about Garfiel. But Subaru wasn’t ready to settle with that reasoning.
If he just gave his imagination a little more to work with, perhaps he would be able to form an idea of Garfiel.
[Subaru: There’s still too much I don’t know, including whether he has a Gospel or not...]
But he had to shelve that question for now.
While he was reluctant to let it go, Subaru made a small sound when a branch grazed his right ear as he struggled to step over the roots. Then,
[Otto: I see it. We’ll come out at the village soon]
Hearing Otto’s call, Subaru strained his narrow vision to focus ahead. Between the gaps of the trees, through the dark and green, he saw the lights of the village.
Coming out of the forest, at once, the light of the moon and stars shone down from above their heads, as Subaru’s dark field of vision cleared up.
Catching his breath, Subaru looked over his surroundings and confirmed that they had returned to the village of the Sanctuary. Since the time was already night after moonrise, by now, Emilia would have probably started her Trial at the Tomb.
A desire surged up within him, to run there so he could be at her side. But pushing down that emotion once more, Subaru turned back to Otto, and,
[Subaru: If the Trial is happening right now, then this is time to escape. So what are the arrangements, and where are we meeting with our accomplice?]
[Otto: Well, our accomplice――]
Looking up at Subaru’s rapid-fire question, Otto started to point his hand towards the direction of the village. But that movement was interrupted halfway through. And the reason, was a voice.
[???: ――There’s no need to worry, I’m already here]
Cutting into their conversation, a person stepped out with the sound of a footstep.
An extravagant, black maid’s dress. Its white apron, gleaming under the starlight, adorning the lovely girl who still carried some remnants of childishness, like something out of a dream.
[Ram: For now...... well, I’ll just congratulate you on your safe return, Barusu]
With her peach-colored hair swaying, Otto’s accomplice―― Ram, greeted Subaru with her usual refreshing expression, spewing venom.
-=Chapter 39 End=-