CH 104

Like a man cut off from his personal desires. Yihan acted like a person without any personal feelings, completely turning a blind eye to them. Therefore, no matter how many people revered Yihan as a wise emperor, how could Eunuch Oh, who served him from the closest place, accept everything as natural?

Of course, it was true that unlike ordinary men, an emperor is a person who has to live with a bigger ambition for the nation. But no human being can live like that for the rest of his life. Eunuch Oh wanted his emperor to be a wise emperor, but at the same time, he wished him to live a happy life. He hoped that he could feel small happiness by looking at something he liked after finishing his political affairs. Whether it was a concubine, a painting, or a dance of a humble dancer. He thought it would be nice if the emperor could be happy with anything other than national affairs.

It was for that reason that Eunuch Oh secretly gave Yeonbin strength when Yeonbin changed and the emperor began to pay too much attention to him. Although Yeonbin in the past was an audacious man, if he really lost his memory and became a new man, Eunuch Oh considered it an opportunity. He even felt excited to see the new side of the emperor, who reacted sensitively to every word and action of Yeonbin like a boy having his first love.

He thought that if the emperor and the new Yeonbin could get along, perhaps for the first time, the Emperor would have some personal, small pleasure.

That was the reason why he kept telling stories about Yeonbin in front of the emperor and stealthily saying things to support him. He wanted anything, whatever it was, to grow in the emperor’s mind. 

“…”

Eunuch Oh stared at the bedroom beyond the locked door in silence. He recalled the emperor who touched Yeonbin’s nameplate several times but never could turn it over to the end. 

Wasn’t it something light? Wasn’t it just a feeling of coming back home after a day’s work and getting a little joy? 

Was Yeonbin really entered deep into the emperor’s mind? Enough to make him wary so painfully? To the extent that he had to hold on to his own footstep? Enough to remind him of the previous emperor who made the empress dowager unhappy all her life because he overly loved a concubine?

In the silence, Eunuch Oh’s eyes became dark as if they were sinking to bottomless ground. He was wondering if it was a big mistake to try to make the emperor and Yeonbin become closer. The darkness was deepening as if only it could show the way in front of a problem that still had no answer. 

***

Looking at Jeongan Palace which was surrounded by silence, Seocheon was thinking about Yeonbin, whom he encountered a while ago. It was inevitable that he would run into Yeonbin the moment he arrived at Jeongan Palace, and that was exactly what Seocheon had hoped for. He hadn’t decided what to do, but Seocheon wanted to see Yeonbin in person, who was said to have completely changed. He wanted to make sure with his own eyes that the rumor was true. 

But now that he had met Yeonbin right in front of his eyes, Seocheon could not define what he felt at all. 

He was bitter and enraged. Seeing the one who brought Hawoon to death shamelessly living alone and enjoying all the good things reminded him of Hawoon, who left the world in cold and pain. At the same time, Seocheon was confused. It wasn’t just because Yeonbin spoke kindly to them. 

Of course, that in itself was a surprise. It was surprising that Yeonbin, who was famous for slandering the lower ones whenever he opened his mouth, worried about the guards, who were clearly untouchable people from their clothes.

But the thing that made Seocheon so confused. The thing that made him had been thinking about his encounter with Yeonbin for so long. 

It was not simply because of the words or sentences he uttered, but because of his tone. The atmosphere felt in the voice was the problem. Seocheon had never encountered Yeonbin before today. Therefore, he never knew firsthand what kind of voice Yeonbin had and how he spoke. 

But Yeonbin’s voice, which he heard today, was strangely familiar. It didn’t feel new as if he had already heard it before.

“Jamun.” 

Seocheon, who had been thinking alone for a long time, soon spoke to a fellow guard who was on duty with him. 

“Huh?” 

“You said you’ve been at Jeongan Palace since you entered the palace, right?” 

“I did. Why?” 

“Speaking of His Highness Yeonbin… Did he sound like that even before he changed?”

As soon as he heard Seocheon’s question, Jamun answered with a frown.

“No! Absolutely not!” 

“… No?” 

“I mean, it’s, erm… So in terms of the voice itself, it was similar, but the tone and the vibe were completely different, so it feels like the voice also has changed.” 

“Hmm…” 

“Don’t get me started. He has changed as if a completely different person has taken over him. It’s not about him not getting angry or cursing, erm, should I say that it’s about the way he talks? All of those just feel like a completely different person.”

As if a completely different person has taken over him. 

Jamun’s words echoed inside Seocheon’s head. He had no idea why at that moment, the story of Yeonbin tying a handkerchief to one court lady’s injured hand came to mind. Just as Hawoon’s handkerchief was tied to his blistered hand once. 

“It’s great that His Highness Yeonbin changed, but sometimes… It’s a little scary, too.” 

Jamun’s voice kept reaching Seocheon, who was deep in his thoughts.

“Even if he survived death, how can a person change like that…” 

Hawoon was a guard of Jeongan Palace. He must have been liked by many people because of his unlimited kindness and gentleness. If so, wouldn’t some people, who had a cranky personality and could not win other people’s affection, covet Hawoon’s personality? If they could steal it, wouldn’t they be greedy enough to do so?

Seocheon shook his head at once. He likely had too many thoughts that night.

***

“… How is it going with the head eunuch for Jeongan Palace?” 

The emperor asked while heading to Cheonggeon Hall for morning inquiry. Eunuch Oh bowed and answered. 

“Yes, Your Majesty. Along with the person who will take the position of the head eunuch, a few eunuchs will go to Jeongan Palace today. This is because there are not many eunuchs at Jeongan Palace.” 

“Did you check them yourself?” 

“Of course, Your Majesty, I have personally examined and selected each and every person recommended by the Department of Internal Affairs, so you can let go of your worries.”

In response to Eunuch Oh’s answer, the emperor closed his eyes tightly for a moment before opening them. 

During the few days when he stopped visiting Jeongan Palace, the emperor’s expression disappeared noticeably. It was hard to tell if this was the same person who wore his emotions on his sleeve a dozen times a day. No, even compared to the emperor before Yeonbin changed, the current Yihan had an overly stiff and heavy face. 

Needless to say, Eunuch Oh’s worries were deepening by the day. It wasn’t that Eunuch Oh didn’t know that the reason lay on Yeonbin. It was not easy at all because whenever he suggested visiting Jeongan Palace, the emperor became as sharp as though he was on alert.

In addition, it was not easy for Eunuch Oh to actively step up and recommend something to the emperor because he was still not sure how he should behave for the sake of the emperor and the future of his lord. In the end, Eunuch Oh spoke passively even though he had a good opportunity because the emperor brought up Jeongan Palace after a long time. 

“His Highness Yeonbin will be deeply moved with your boundless grace, Your Majesty.”

Eunuch Oh expected the emperor would say something more about Jeongan Palace, but the emperor, who did not even answer, did not say anything until the palanquin reached Cheonggeon Hall. Eunuch Oh could not dare to look at the face of the emperor in case he read sorrow in the expressionless face. 

***

“Jaran. I know that you married me because you have a great ambition in your heart that is no different from that of a man.”

Jaran still remembered every word that her husband, the Crown Prince, who would later become the emperor of the nation, told her that day. It would probably be an unforgettable moment until the day of her death. 

At that time, Yihan, who was still a crown prince, noticed that his several brothers, led by the second prince, the son of the noble concubine, were trying to kill him. His father was already weak because of a chronic disease, and his mother had no power to protect her son. In the end, in order for Yihan to survive, he had no choice but to move first and punish his brothers.