CH 106

However, without knowing Ahjin’s feelings, Hwawoon shook his head to stop Ahjin.

“What’s wrong with being afraid of me?” 

“Your Highness.” 

“All of you see and believe me because you’re by my side, but those who haven’t seen my change yet may still be afraid of me. He must be nervous to be a member of Jeongan Palace all of a sudden, so don’t blame him too much.” 

“Look at this. How kind is our master…”

“Yes, yes. I’m sure Sojeong will get better gradually.” 

In fact, for someone who was officially assigned as the head eunuch of Jeongan Palace—not just visiting for a moment—to not act calm in front of his master and show such disgrace could have been greatly scolded. It didn’t apply only in front of the infamous Yeonbin, but also in other palaces. Nevertheless, Yeonbin still covered for him with a soft voice. Listening to that, Sojeong blinked his eyes as he bowed his head. Hwawoon’s voice ensued.

“If you have any problem, ask Ahjin here. She’s the one who knows Jeongan Palace better than anyone else.” 

“Yes. Yes, Your Highness.” 

“Now you are a member of Jeongan Palace. Let’s get along well from now on.” 

“… Yes, Your Highness. I’ll risk everything I have to serve you, Your Highness.”

Sojeong’s replying voice seemed a little better, so Hwawoon smiled, pulling at Ahjin’s sleeve as she still looked dissatisfied. It was the first time in a long time that a new family joined Jeongan Palace. 

***

Jeongbin, Songhyun, came to Jeongan Palace to find out about Hwawoon’s condition. Songhyun, who rushed into Jeongan Palace with a pack of medicines and everything that was good for wounds, asked if he was okay relentlessly and made Hwawoon burst into laughter. Songhyun then realized that she was too excited. She rolled her eyes around, took a sip of tea, and spoke to Hwawoon in a clear, calm voice. 

“I’m… very grateful to you for that day.” 

“…” 

“That day, at Changgyeong Pavilion. You saved me.” 

It wasn’t as much as how he saved Sukbi’s life, but Songhyun thought she also received great help from Yeonbin that could never be repaid. Songhyun was still able to vividly recall Yeonbin’s voice calling her, who was just standing there, scared.

At that moment, Songhyun saw her precious brother in Yeonbin. Isn’t it hard to believe? The person, who shared no drop of blood with her and in a way no different from her love rival, thought about herself in a dangerous and urgent situation. He helped her. He protected Songhyun so well that he seemed to overlap with her brother, whom she relied on the most in the world. If she had not experienced it in person, she would have dismissed it as nonsense. 

Hwawoon, who heard Songhyun’s words, smiled lightly as if he finally understood what she was saying.

“To say I saved you is a bit of a stretch.” 

“No, it’s not. If Yeonbin didn’t call me then, I would just stand stupidly, crying, and who knows what would happen to me.” 

Ironically, Songhyun, who was reflecting on the memory after the incident at Changgyeong Pavilion alone, realized that Yeonbin was actually a completely different person from her older brother. It was a natural thing to say, but until then, Songhyun was always seeing her brother over Yeonbin, who showed her kind words. That was why she suddenly showed favor toward Yeonbin, who had been harassing her so much in the past. 

But Songhyun realized. Yeonbin is not her brother. Just because he was a friendly man to her, he should not be regarded as a replacement for her brother. Instead, Songhyun saw Yeonbin, the person named Yeon Hwawoon, again. 

The man, whom she didn’t like at all in the past, but a man who became a completely different person and silently dealt with all the arrows flying toward him. The man who bowed his head to Songhyun and Sukbi and held fast to his gentle attitude, even though he clearly knew that no matter how kind he was, he wouldn’t hear kind words back. 

The same man who was willing to help Songhyun and even saved Biyoung at the expense of his safety.

“Thank you so much, Yeonbin.” 

Songhyun said, finally facing Yeonbin, Yeon Hwawoon, straight. 

“Just as Yeonbin did for me, I will also be sincere to Yeonbin in the future.” 

Songhyun no longer saw her brother in Yeonbin. 

***

“Speaking of, Jeongbin…” 

Hwawoon’s hesitating voice held onto Songhyun, who stood up as she worried that it would be too much burden on Hwawoon’s body if she stayed too long. Songhyun stopped moving for a while and looked at Hwawoon. 

“Yes, Yeonbin. Do you have anything to say…?” 

“About that… So…”

“Why are you hesitating so much? Feel free to talk about it. Even Her Highness Sukbi and I act comfortably in private places.” 

Songhyun hinted that she wanted to get close to Yeonbin. Last time, she almost asked him to live like siblings out of her mind because she missed her brother, but considering Yeonbin’s position, there would be nothing more embarrassing to say. Now Songhyun felt grateful that she could not bring it up because of the emperor’s sudden visit that day.

Songhyun had known about Yeonbin a little better, and she was also going to wait leisurely until Yeonbin felt close to her. Although it was inevitable that she couldn’t prevent herself from showing her heart like this.

Despite Songhyun’s words, Hwawoon couldn’t easily bring it up, and after moving his mouth a few more times, he spoke with a nervous face.

“Is… Is His Majesty doing good…?” 

At the end of his question, there was a hint of confusion on Songhyun’s face. Hwawoon, whose face was burning at the thought of asking something useless, hastily added. 

“No, it’s nothing. I shouldn’t have… asked you something unnecessary.” 

“Yeonbin…” 

“Please pretend you didn’t hear what I just said. Then go back safely, Jeongbin.” 

Songhyun, who was trying to answer, shut up when Hwawoon looked so embarrassed as he pushed Songhyun to go. Songhyun also heard that the emperor had recently stopped visiting Jeongan Palace, but it wasn’t something that Songhyun could easily say in front of Hwawoon. Thus, Songhyun composed her expression as if she had not heard such a question, as Hwawoon asked, and said,

“Then Yeonbin, have a rest now. I’ll come back again next time.”

Songhyun greeted Hwawoon with a casual face as much as possible so that Hwawoon would not be embarrassed and then turned around. Looking at Songhyun leaving Jeongan Palace, Hwawoon slumped into his chair. Ahjin quickly approached and examined Hwawoon’s complexion. 

“Your Highness, are you all right?” 

“I asked something unnecessary…” 

“What do you mean unnecessary? It is normal for you to be curious about His Majesty.” 

Hwawoon closed his eyes with a sigh as he heard Ahjin’s voice becoming sullen. 

I should’ve held back. I shouldn’t have asked such a question no matter how curious I am about His Majesty. Regret washed over him from the depths of his heart. 

On the last day Hwawoon saw Yihan. He left Jeongan Palace while saying that he would come again to Hwawoon. When Hwawoon heard that the emperor had come but left again because he was already asleep from Ahjin the morning after, he was feeling so sad. He kept missing Yihan even though he didn’t see him for only a day. He was nervous all day, thinking that he shouldn’t go to sleep first. But then the emperor had stopped his visit without saying anything, so Hwawoon couldn’t help but be worried and curious.

He must be busy. He will come if he has time. He thought like that at first. He must be very busy. He shouldn’t get sick. He was having those worries. Then suddenly Hwawoon realized. In fact, there were a lot more days when the emperor didn’t come to Jeongan Palace. 

His heart sank as soon as he realized it. He didn’t understand why he thought the emperor would surely come to Jeongan Palace. 

What am I? Both the past Yeonbin nor I mean nothing to the emperor, so why am I thinking that it is natural to see him? The dream-like short days were just a short luxury that I could get because I was seriously injured. 

Hwawoon was ashamed of himself for taking them for granted. 

After realizing it, he no longer spent time waiting for the emperor. But that didn’t mean that Hwawoon didn’t think about the emperor. Hwawoon was curious about him as he realized that he didn’t know when he could see him again. It worried him that he might get sick because even when he visited Jeongan Palace regularly, he had a hard time sparing some time as he was busy with political affairs every day.

That was why Hwawoon suddenly asked Songhyun about the emperor today. He was wondering if that person was okay. He wanted to know. If he couldn’t see him in person, he wanted to hear his news, at least. 

“What kind of disgrace is this?” 

“Your Highness…”

Ahjin was saddened by Hwawoon’s self-ridiculing words. If she could, she wanted to run to Anjeong Palace right away and have a private meeting with the emperor, but Ahjin, who couldn’t do that, was just sad.