82 [82]

Karen stared blankly into space. This does not give an answer. This life is so confusing. But at least you have to be honest with yourself.

Karen clasped her hand. My fingernail dug into my palm. I felt strange. I don't like your acceptance of me. I don't like the sudden change in appearance so far. Can you believe it? Can you trust Raymond? Karen could not be trusted.

But it is Dulan, not her, who decides. It was him who judged whether love was right or not.

In the first place, Karen chased Raymond in her life because Duran threw the bait. That's why Karen worked hard with Raymond instead of her grand dream as a serial killer. When did things start to go wrong. But that's not the point. Karen soothed her disappointment.

"Yes, there's no problem.”

Karen murmured. an empty room The sun is warm. It was the height of summer. to be dazzling You have to get up. There is not much time left for peace. Raymond proposed to him, so you should visit Duran on that basis.

Whatever emotion Karen feels towards Raymond, or not at all. It wouldn't be that important. Karen sighed. I hope Duran answers Raymond's proposal.

Karen now gets a hint from Duran, and she can finally die.

Because human emotions are very trivial. In this tedious series of lives, the emotions of a person who changes dozens of times a day in the maze of eternity are worthless.

"That's why I feel weird."

Maybe he's barking up the wrong tree.

Karen shook her head.

"This is all because of Lord Raymond.”

Karen came to a conclusion.

That's why I'm having a hard time. Because Raymond gave me flowers. Because it was the flower he gave me when he first proposed marriage. And now it's because it's given again. A hundred years have passed. Raymond hasn't changed. Karen exercises a spirit that is about to collapse.

"Maybe it's because I don't love him."

Karen said. I look at the portraits. Maybe it is. It's Karen who did the wrong. Because Karen did not really love and treated people in type, she did not love them but saw love as a means.

Karen herself hasn't loved anyone for 100 years.

So I thought I might be repeating myself.

Your mother, your mother, your mother's mothers met the man they really loved and got out of the curse, and they're stuck in the mire because they don't love anyone.

"Then if I love you, will it all be over?"

Karen murmured. But I don't know the answer. I'm just muttering.

Karen looked down at the flowers alone in the room and suppressed her desire to cry.

Still, it will be worth a try.

It's worth trying.

It's just around the corner, but Karen still vowed to work harder to love Raymond.

But that night Raymond didn't come back with just one letter left,

"Isn't it too fast?”

Karen looked down at Raymond's letter in a hurry.

Something suddenly came up and I think I have to leave for the time being. It was not a proper letter, and it seemed to have been scribbled by tearing up the notebook in a hurry. I can't believe you're trying to treat someone who's about to retire like this.

"Don't you think it's a good idea to postpone the wedding?”

"No, it's hard to put it off.”

There is not much time left anyway. We don't know exactly when Raymond will arrive, but he has no doubt that he will eventually return safely this time and marry her.

"But like this….”

Karen looked down at another letter.

It was a letter from the royal family.

Prince Gwiz is calling her again.

***

a letter with a clear intention

Come next to me and heat my bed.

Karen sighed. There is no Raymond. And Count Elba will never protect herself. Falling in love with the royal family is too risky. A person who believes in cause and conscience like Raymond does such crazy things. So Karen chose him. But will Raymond be able to protect her again this time? Now, more and more events have begun to occur that make it difficult for Karen to calculate the number of cases.

What will happen if I don't go?”

This is the ordeal that came again because he made a difficult decision for a long time.

Raymond is called to work again, and he is called to Prince Gwiz. In the old days, suffering from Isela was the end. As expected, the villain in romance novels likes women. The story becomes ugly when a man is in it. It smells dirty.

"Why is Prince Gwiz so obsessed with me?"

"Lady..."

You rutted bastard.

Is she relieving her daughter of her regret for not conquering her mother? Of course, Karen did not intend to use the waste Catherine had thrown away. It's not good for hygiene. Not to mention mental health.

If he doesn't go, how long will Raymond be called by your orders? Raymond said he would no longer have a direct impact if he quit the army and became a senator, but his opponent is royal. It's also the crown prince. How far can Raymond resist him? Even now, Raymond is not with Karen. How far can he protect you?

"I have to go to Prince Gwiz to make Lord Raymond safer?”

Should it be so?

Like many tyrants do. Does Raymond go to a dangerous place like a husband who lost his married woman and her fiancee to powerful people? Is that why Karen should go to Prince Gwiz to ensure the safety of herself and Raymond? Until he's satisfied? Waiting to get tired of old stuff? Until when?

But Karen still has to choose.

In the end, it is a matter of whether or not to do it. Karen has to do it, if you insist. I put some weight on the side.

But there were two problems.

The first was Prince Gwiz, one of his mother's former suitors. And my mother was a person who lived a repetitive life like herself. Karen didn't want to use a stick that her mother might have used. It was too unsanitary. It was an instinctive rejection.

"You can't do anything about it."

Karen felt like handing food waste over to her throat, but she still sighed and was convinced. Considering the time he repeated, Gwiz consoled that he would be younger than him, but there were quite a few things he didn't want to live to this age.

But the bigger problem is something else.

The second was whether that was what Duran thought of love.

There were so many and so many stories of women leaving themselves to other men for the sake of men. But Karen has never seen the end happily end. The best thing would be for a couple to ask and do it, but Raymond didn't think it would be.

Should I spread my legs to Prince Gwiz for Raymond?

Is that love?

Karen stays alone in the room and sees portraits filled with walls. I see women. I see my mother.

Is it love to be a prostitute for love?

Did you guys do that?

Will the Divine Spirit acknowledge it as love?

If you love Raymond, should you sleep with another man for him?

"…the proof of love to be an old-timer?"

It's not even funny.

Why did he try to kill a person in this life? He didn't want to be killed anymore, so he wanted to live a new life, so he raised a knife.

But why do you have to be so messy and confused.

Why should I take such a dirty test?

The night fell in confusion.

It's morning again.

***

"Madam, you should have a meal….”

"Get me out."

Karen fell down and met no one. I didn't even want to think about it. I wanted to extend the grace period as much as possible. I don't want to judge. I don't want to choose. Let's hang in there and try to love Raymond when he comes. Let Prince Gwiz choose whether to go or not. Maybe it's love that we're discussing together.

"This letter..."

Karen handed a letter to Donna. There were no recipients. Karen said again.

"Tell Duran."

Karen decided to peek at the answer sheet rather than make a mistake. I didn't want to study anymore. Let's go if you say it's right to go. If Duran asks you to go, he'll answer even if you have an unsanitary experience. What if Raymond dies because I told him not to go? Then that would also be Duran's responsibility. Karen is sick and tired of it. Raymond, Dulan, Gwiz, Verdig and Isel.

***

But Raymond didn't come. Dulan never answered.

Karen was buried in the flowers and counted. One, two, three....

And think about the past. How was he then? At that time...

***

Night came again, and the day came when Prince Gwiz spoke.

knock, knock

Someone knocked on the door. Donna seems to have left her seat. Karen closed her ears with a pillow. The clothes were in pajamas. Karen closed her eyes. He really didn't want to go. I didn't want to use what my mother used to use.

"It's all right."

Time is almost up now. A month and a half. If you wait that long, it's Karen's wedding. And the next day, Karen will either die or it will be over this time.

knock, knock

You won't have to spread your legs anymore. You won't have to cut your head anymore. Anymore

knock, knock

"Get out."

"Take orders."

A strange man came in, not Donna. It was a man in plain clothes. But his face was tough, and his forearms were thick. a man who shows his whole body how to do bad things Karen made an impression.

"Get out."

"Prince Gwizu asked me to bring him."

"They say no."

"I can't tell a lie to him."

"I'm getting married. Why would you do this?"

"I only accept Prince Gwizu's orders. He wants to talk to you."

The man grabbed Karen by the wrist. Karen was forcibly raised from her bed. Karen shouted at the door.

"Dona!"

“…….”

"Let Count Elba know!"

This is a hell of a pass. No matter how much Crown Prince Gwizu is, he can't take a woman who lives in a baron's house and take the baron's fiancee like this and do whatever he wants.

"Let go. Are you going to drag me like a pig or a dog?"

"I'm just following orders. Karen Evans, stand up and follow your orders. He wants to see you."

"Dona!"

But there is no answer. There was no maid. How long has it been gone?

Karen regretted having too few people around her. At least let Count Elba know. You should at least let Lian know. You can't be dragged away without anyone knowing. Even if she keeps her mouth shut, there should be at least a viewer. But why isn't anyone here?