CH 10.1

“Dai Xingren, is that you?” A clear voice suddenly echoed in his ears. He turned his head to meet a beautiful female face just as she came out of the next ward, her cherry lips set in a smile and her eyes shining brightly. He was stunned for a moment and finally recognised who she was. “You’re… Jian Yi An?”

“Yes, it’s been a long time.” Jian Yi An greeted him warmly. “I heard from Chuan Ya that you were back, but I never got a chance to see you.” She turned her face away and winked at him playfully. “I heard you’ve been chasing after Chuan Ya very diligently lately?”

“Did she… tell you?” He asked blankly, still in a trance-like state of mind.

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“Of course, we are good sisters! How could she not tell me about something so important?” She smiled sweetly. “Have you finished your operation? Did you come to see Chuan Ya?”

“Zlp, cwv… pbl osd’v zlv xl pll bla.” Tl obkprlale elprsdeldvzu, bkp nblpv nsze.

“Ebs pyke pbl oswzed’v pll usw?” Fbl oyp pwarakple. “Fbl’p clld oykvkdt qsa usw.”

“Fbl’p clld oykvkdt qsa xl? Jwv…” Pyk Dkdtald zssjle blpkvydvzu yv vbl essa okvb vbl “Ls Akpkvsap” pktd bydtkdt.

“Ebyv?” Kydl Zk Gd dsvknle vbl ekalnvksd sq bkp pktbv yde zywtble. “Zsw’hl tsv vbl oasdt assx, kv kp vbkp sdl.” Fbl tlpvwale clbkde bla.

Rp vbyv obyv kv oyp, bl bye tsv vbl assx oasdt? Pyk Dkdtald oyp ewxcqswdele, cwv bl eked’v byhl vkxl vs qllz ydu pbyxl yde bypvkzu ypjle. “Tso kp pbl? Rp pbl sjyu?”

“Just a little fever.” Jian Yi An shook her head and sighed. “She’s too stubborn. She’s obviously not feeling well but insists on going out. One could easily see how eager she was to go on a date with you. You should understand her heart, right?”

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He stared at her blankly.

Seeing his stupid appearance, Jian Yi An wanted to sigh again. This man clearly loved Chuan Ya, and Chuan Ya loved him too. Why couldn’t these two confirm each other’s intentions?

“Forget it, just go in.” She pushed him gently. “I have to help Chuan Ya go home and get a document that the dean asked for. You can take your time and talk with her and make things clear.”

With Jian Yi An’s encouragement, Dai Xingren gently pushed open the door of the room where his wife rested while admiring the misty twilight outside the window.

She seems to be in good spirits, only her face is a little pale. It was just a fever. When he was sure his wife was all right, Dai Xingren’s worried heart immediately settled down, his unsettled spirit found its balance, and his chaotic heartbeat gradually stabilized.

She’s fine, she’s fine. He’s been overthinking things. He’s been thinking too much. She is fine…

Dai Xingren stroked his throat where an unfathomable dreaded thought had been stuck. He did not make a sound, but leaned against the door looking at his wife in fascination.

No, this kind of thing can’t ever happen again. He couldn’t go through a similar choice again, such a choice was too risky…

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“Xingren, have you finished the operation?” Mo Chuan Ya looked back and raised her voice in surprise when she saw him. “Was the operation successful? How is the child?”

He took a deep breath and tried to find his voice. “Well, the operation was successful and the child… has been saved.”

“That’s good, that’s great.” She was genuinely happy.

He slowly walked towards her and sat down on the edge of the bed, his hand trembling as he touched her burning forehead. “Why didn’t you tell me you weren’t feeling well?”

“It’s just a minor fever. I think I caught a cold last night.” Mo Chuan Ya was a bit embarrassed. “The dean and the others are being overly dramatic, making me stay in the hospital for the day. It’s a good thing the ward isn’t full today, otherwise I’d be wasting medical resources.” She paused. “I think I’d better go home. It’s funny to be hospitalized for just a fever.”

“No, you stay here.” He cut shortly. Even if he was being selfish, whether it was a waste of medical resources or not, he wanted her to get the best medical care possible. “You stay here and I’ll… watch over you.”

She frowned slightly. From his disappointed expression, she saw something was wrong. He seemed to be worried about something, as if he had some kind of dilemma to solve.

“What’s the matter with you? Xingren, what happened?” She asked with concern.

At her words, his mind went blank and his brow locked in consternation. He took a deep look in her eyes and, with indescribable tenderness full of regret in his eyes. “Chuan Ya, I…”

“What’s wrong with you?”

“I… don’t want to be a doctor anymore.” He continued, enduring the most painful of the struggles in his heart, slowly, word-for-word. “I can’t be a doctor anymore.”

“What did you say?” She gasped in horror and stared at him incredulously.

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He shut his eyes bitterly. “I can’t… be a doctor any more.”

“Why not? Why not?” She raised her voice in agitation, and a thousand piles of snow rose in her heart. “You make it clear, why on earth?”

He had told her that his only life ambition was to be a cardiovascular surgeon, hadn’t he? Her mother had told her that the reason for it was so he could redeem himself from the regret of not being able to save his father’s life. He wanted to be a doctor and was destined to be a good one. He had the talent to be a doctor, was born to be one, was his vision and dream, Wasn’t it? How could he so easily say he was going to give it up?

“You’re crazy! Are you crazy, Dai Xingren?” Mo Chuan Ya punched her husband’s shoulder in anger and frustration, desolated over his decision. “Wasn’t it your ambition to practice medicine and save people? How can you just say you don’t want to do it now? Are your ideals so worthless? Are they that cheap? If you can just say you’re giving up and do it then what the hell have I been doing for the past five years…”

She paused abruptly.

Why did she stop talking?

Dai Shengren raised his eyes in shock and was surprised to find that his wife was crying, crystal-clear tears sliding like brilliant ice beads down her cheeks, cutting deep into his heart.

“Chuan Ya…”

“Get out! Go away! I don’t want to see you!” She couldn’t help but drive him away.

Worried that she was too emotional and her body would not be able to bear it. He had to give in to her wish for the time being. 

“Get some rest, I’ll wait outside for you.”

He went outside the room and sat down on a bench. It was a familiar feeling. It served to remind him why he had always annoyed the woman he loved the most five years ago, and why he always failed to understand her heart.

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He laughed at himself. He was willing to stay outside the door like a fool, hoping his wife would change her mind and accept him back. He didn’t know how long he waited until a small shrill voice sounded and brought him back to his senses.

“Dai Xingren, why are you sitting there alone?” Jian Yi An’s  voice sounded surprised.

He looked up and smiled bitterly. “I seem to have made Chuan Ya angry once again.”

“God, you guys are…” Jian Yi An tapped her forehead. She simply didn’t know what to say. Seeing that the man looked like a lost child, she couldn’t help feeling sorry and handed him a bunch of keys. “These are the keys to Chuan Ya’s house.”

He took the keys, bewildered, not understanding what she was trying to do.

“I’ve just gone to her house to get the documents and found something very interesting. It’s in the bottom drawer of her desk.” Jian Yi An sighedy, her eyes slightly shadowed in sadness. “After you’ve seen it, you will know that in the past five years, all of us have been deceived by her―”