CH 54

Seventeen years old.

It seemed that Hindley had completely given up seeing a son from Emily since her last miscarriage. He tormented Rosen just like that.

Rosen quickly began to drink the herbal water that Emily made her at a set time each morning. The dr*g kept Hindley’s seed from settling in her stomach. Of course, it was only a temporary measure.

Rosen couldn’t stop the flow of time. She was tall and gained weight. The gaze of people had changed. The soldiers who treated her like a child began to whistle whenever she passed. She wanted to rip off their snouts.

Anyway, the day Hindley began to doubt why Rosen couldn’t have children, Emily and Rosen were doomed. Because Hindley was becoming more open-minded.

Hindley asked Rosen as she was preparing breakfast with a bruised eye.

“How old are you?”

“Well, I was 14 years old, then I would be 16 now…”

“You idiot. You don’t you even know your age?”

“Why do you need to know? It doesn’t matter if I cook well.”

Rosen was definitely more gifted than Emily at telling lies. She tried to change the subject, but Hindley was particularly persistent that day.

“Let’s see. Since you were 15 when I brought you here, you will be 17 this spring. They said that there must be a problem with not having children at this age.”

“Who said that?”

“Everyone does.”

“Are they doctors? Hindley knows better. Because we are working hard, it will happen soon.”

Ignoring Hindley, who scanned her suspiciously, she brazenly lied. He grabbed her angrily and slapped her meaninglessly. Rosen was beaten because it was familiar. She had accepted that the more she resisted, the more she was beaten.

“Should I sell you and buy someone else?”

‘Sure.’

‘If you bring in a child according to your taste, it will take about two years to feed, dress, and raise them before you can bed them.’

Rosen placed soup in front of Hindley. He pounded his chest and stared at her.

“Be careful what you do. It wouldn’t be good if you gave birth to someone else’s child. If that happens, I will strangle you and the child.”

Rosen nodded her head resolutely. She knew why Hindley was panicking. Two years after the war began and soldiers wandered around the neighborhood, drama took place every day.

Soldiers and wives were found secretly meeting in forests or empty huts, taking off their clothes and getting entangled. There were times when it was a misunderstanding and times when it was real. Either way, the development was similar. The soldier fled and the wife was beaten to death by her husband. Two unlucky souls were killed.

Some were framed, and others, like Charlie’s wife next door, had real affairs. People scolded and cursed her, saying that people who cheated deserved to die, but she felt sorry for his wife.

There were many young wives in the neighborhood. Charlie’s wife was also one of those poor girls who had been sold to give birth to a son. She was beaten every day because she didn’t get pregnant.

Every time Rosen saw Charlie’s bald head and age spots, she was convinced that the problem must be with Charlie, not her. To be honest, she wondered if his thing could stand at that age. 

A young soldier appeared in the neighborhood without knowing she was married and whispered that he loved the woman… Wouldn’t it be strange not to be deceived?

The child was found dead at dawn. The soldier was a coward, so he left and transferred to another unit. Charlie was brought to trial. At the first, he was sentenced to eight years, but at his re-trial, he was released due to ‘insufficient evidence’ and returned to town. He soon bought another wife.

Hindley didn’t have to worry about Rosen, at least in that regard. After their escape attempt, she was detained by the military. Just thinking about their shameless giggling made her want to vomit.

There was only one exception. A name that was engraved in her mind before she woke up to cruel reality. The person she fell in love with when she was younger and more innocent.

Ian Kerner.

He was still in her sky. 

As the war intensified, his voice appeared more frequently on the radio, and more flyers were produced. 

She still picked them up and collected them.

But it wasn’t the same as before. 

She squatted in the kitchen without Hindley knowing, examining his flyers and listening to his broadcast, but… 

Instead of imagining of him somewhere in the sky, she clenched her jaw and murmured in melancholy.

[This is the Leoarton Squadron. Can you hear me?]

“I’m listening.”

[My name is Ian Kerner. Our squadron is always protecting you.]

“No. You’re too far away. You’re in the sky.”

Every time she looked at his face, she remembered the eyes of the captain who sent her back. If she met Ian Kerner in person, would he have the same expression?

Probably.

It wasn’t him who said he would protect her either. He lived in the sky, and she was just a rat in the slums of Leoarton. 

She knew him and she liked him, whom she had never seen face to face.

‘I am nothing to him.’

She sometimes had nightmares. 

She was recklessly dragged away by Hindley at the ticket office again. And there stood Ian Kerner, instead of the unknown captain. Even though she shouted for help, he coldly turned away from her.

She knew it was a delusion. Ian Kerner did nothing wrong. He was everyone’s hero, but he wasn’t a God. He couldn’t be everywhere, and he really couldn’t protect everyone.

[I will protect you, wherever you are…]

That was the lie he told them all.

But nevertheless, she felt betrayed.

She didn’t want to accept the cruel truth. 

He was the only thing she could hold on to in this d*mn town…

***

Her seventeenth winter. 

A plague swept through Leoarton. Due to the endless war, food was scarce. The whole city was weak. Even strong people who would not have contracted a fever in the past fell ill. Every morning, when she woke up and opened the window, she could see the people who had died the night before lining the city square.

The treatment center was overflowing with people. Emily and Rosen had to work day and night. Even so, a deep depression loomed over the chaotic city. The only person who smiled was Hindley, who sat and counted the money that rolled in.

Emily told Rosen to avoid contact with patients’ bodily fluids as much as possible. But no matter how careful she was, it was impossible to keep up after dealing with many patients who vomited and fell sick.

She was the first one to fall. Fortunately, she recovered before she became a corpse, but now Emily was sick in bed. She took care of Emily with tears in her eyes every night. She felt like her body was going to break because she was working all day, but fatigue lost strength in the face of the fear that Emily might die.

Emily’s fever never went down.

“…You know, Rosen. No matter what happens in the future, you must live well, okay?”

Emily reached out and laboriously stroked Rosen’s hair. A hoarse voice escaped from between her chapped lips.

“Emily. Don’t say anything ominous. A healthy person like you will never die like this. Okay? You are going to get well soon. I’m going to die if you die. How can I live without Emily? ”

‘How can I survive in this hellish place without Emily?’ 

‘Emily is the only person I have had since I was born, and the only one I have loved and been loved by.’ 

Rosen finally burst into tears and buried her face in Emily’s lap.

“No. You have to live well. Promise me. You will live a good life no matter what.”

“…”

“It’s not like I’m saying it because I’m sick. You can do it. You are a brave girl.”

Emily tried to get up, reciting the phrase over and over again. 

“Please stay still.” 

Rosen forced Emily to lie down again. 

But Emily was stubborn.

She wasn’t going to stop until she heard Rosen’s answer. 

Rosen nodded her head as hard as she could.

There was nothing she wouldn’t do to make Emily feel relieved.

“My throat hurts.”

“It’s even more frustrating because the necklace is squeezing your neck when you cough. I wish I could remove it… ”

“I know, Rosen. But we can’t.”

Rosen stared at Emily’s neck. 

She always hated that necklace.

It was an unrealistic notion, but the restraint that was ‘protecting’ Emily seemed to make her even more sick. 

If that necklace glowed green, or if they ripped it off and Emily regained her original power…