Chapter 208 - Resignation

"A resignation letter?" Gill watches me with confusion on his face as he holds the paper in his grip. 

I am seated opposite him. 

"Yes,'' I tell him coldly. 

I don't want to hate him but this is all his fault if he didn't kiss me at the club. I wouldn't be here right now. 

"I don't understand,'' he says and I can't help the tears from escaping my eyes. I am angry at him; I am angry at myself and I am angry at Trick for making me do this. Life doesn't have to be this complicated. I don't have to make hard decisions to make my relationship work. We should be able to continue with love and trust. 

"You don't have to understand, this is not a good fit for me anymore," I tell him calmly. I still need to go to Michael's office to explain this to him. He is the one that got me the job and I know Adina must have mentioned something to him already. 

I mean, there is no way that Trick didn't already tell them everything. 

"Is this because of the kiss? I feel like this is my fault.'' 

I shake my head "No, this doesn't have anything to do with you. I just don't want to work here anymore. I am sorry.'' I tell him. 

He is still gripping the letter tightly. I watch him as he tries to understand why I am doing this. 

"Okay,'' he says and I watch him for a few seconds. It is the first time I hear him drop his guard. He is always so confident and cocky but right now, he just looks like a lost boy. 

"Okay,'' I say and he nods. 

"I will go to Michael's office and explain everything to him. I will also need you to collect the stuff that I have in the office.'' 

"Okay, I am really sorry about this,'' he mutters quietly. I see the regret in his eyes but at the end of it all, I can't put the blame on him. yeah, I wish I could but this is not his fault. This has just made me see that my relationship with Patrick is not as steady as I thought it was. We had a dent, just because of something trivial. 

I don't know what else could make him act this way. 

I guess there is just a lot that I thought I had figured out that I haven't. I don't know if I will ever get him to trust me because now, after ten years, he still thinks I will leave him. Time isn't going to make him believe that I am here for the long run. I don't know what else I can do to prove that to him. 

I look at Gill one last time before I leave. I can see that he is not okay but I don't know what I can say to make him believe me that this is not his fault. 

I guess I don't know how to make people believe what I want them to believe. 

I leave his office and climb the stairs to Michael's floor. Once I get to his office. His receptionist smiles at me. 

"Hey,'' she beams happy to see me. 

she is the first person I met here and even though I have not seen her since the day I got the job, it reminds me of the feelings I had. The joy from the prospects of a new beginning. The way I felt when I was told that I got the job. 

I was happy. 

Now I am leaving the job for no God damn reason. 

"Hi, I am here to see Michael,'' I tell her and she smiles. I don't even remember her name. 

"Do you have an appointment?'' 

"No, but if you tell him it's Jack, he will want to see me,'' I tell her with a smile on my face. 

She reaches for the intercom and I watch her as she calls him "Sir, Mr. Brick is here to see you.'' 

She ends the call and smiles at me "He will see you now.'' 

I walk into his office and shut the door behind me. Michael is standing behind his desk. His arms crossed and he is looking at me with a stern expression on his face. 

"Sit down,'' he says as I shut the door. 

I do as he says and I take the seat opposite his desk. He is looking at me with a stern expression that does not align with his personality. he is a happy person, he is always smiling and being friendly but right now, he isn't. 

"So, what is happening?'' he asks me. 

I look at him and I take a deep breath "I am resigning. I am sure you already know what happened.''

He raises his hand up to stop me from talking "Don't come in here assuming I know anything. Be professional.'' he tells me sternly. 

I hate that I am doing this.

I wish someone would just be on my side.

"I am sorry,'' I tell him. 

I am not even sure I am sorry for the right reasons but I am not here to try and justify myself. "I am leaving because my relationship is important to me and I don't want to do anything to jeopardize that.''

"You are going to regret this decision and end up resenting him,'' he tells me blankly. 

He is not even trying to sugarcoat anything. 

"I am sure you mean well but this is my decision and I know what I am doing,'' I tell him. Maybe this is me trying to convince myself. I don't even know what I am doing anymore. 

I have to do this--for us. 

"Okay,'' he says and he sighs. "You leave me no choice. Since you are not here for yourself, I am going to say what I have been meaning to say for a long time. I am not sure if you remember but when you came here for the interview, I told you that I wanted to hire you not just because of your qualifications but also because I have heard really good things about you from Adina. She told me that you are a hard worker and that you are responsible. I wanted to hire someone that will not take this job for granted and who will be committed to the company. I wanted to give you a chance to prove that you are that person and I am not sure if you are. I wanted to give you a chance to prove that you will not be like most people who come and go. I wanted to give you a chance to prove that you are worth my time and effort. I am not sure if you are that person anymore. I cannot measure your commitment because of this decision you are making. I do not think this is the best decision to make but I have no choice but to accept it." 

I thought Michael would be for my resignation but I don't think he agrees with Trick. 

"I am sorry,'' I murmur quietly because I have already made this decision and I need to do this to make my relationship work. 

"I am sorry too.''