Chapter 154 - Full-Service Bot, Denied

After some more time spent in hearty laughter, Miss Calculated eventually takes her glasses off with her left hand, reaching up with her right hand to dry away the few good-humored tears which formed during her bout of hysterics.

“All right, all right. We get it Chi, erm, I guess I can just openly say Maria now, huh? I’m so used to not saying it in front of others, it’s more liberating than I would have expected, hmm.” Before Miss Calculated even puts her glasses back on, she turns her attention over to Miss Chievous, lightly scolding her with a laughing tone that turns contemplative by the end.

Miss Chievous gives one last firm, yet ineffective, kick to Lucas’s ankle. With a dissatisfied snort, she takes half of a step back, standing next to her twin with her arms crossed while wearing a slight pout.

‘Huh. Even though it really looks like the same face, they use such different expressions. I guess Marsha can prolly tell ‘em apart without carin’ about the glasses? Or uh, heh, how they talk, there’s definitely no confusion when Mary’s bein’ a nerd.’

Mikah has rejoined the group upon no longer being subjected to Miss Chievous’s unwanted serenading, and makes a curious hum after Lucas’s thought, turning his attention over towards Miss Masher.

“Huh, I bet you’re right, Lucas. Hey, Marsha, I’m sorry if this is a bit of a weird question, but you can readily tell the difference between your sisters, regardless of what they’re wearing or such, right? I wonder if it’s as easy for you as it is for me though, haha. There’s no confusing the thoughts between the two of them, goodness.” Mikah has a good-natured tone and expression while saying this, and after a slight pause, he laughs a few more times.

Before Miss Masher has a chance to even start her response, Mikah briefly turns his attention back over to Miss Chievous to teasingly rebuke her. “No, thinking the phrase ‘NERD THOUGHTS’ over and over really loudly does NOT count, hahaha!”

Miss Chievous just has an amused grin, but everyone else laughs a few more times.

“Ha! Well, yeah, most of the time. Sometimes Ch- er, Maria can manage to fake it as Mary for a few minutes when she tries real hard. Mary can always make it clear who she is, if she wants, though, heh. Oh! One time, they both were pretendin’ to be Maria at the same time, I actually gave up!” While Miss Masher’s answer is mostly met with laughter, Mikah and Jonathan both have on looks of horror.

“J-just one is already too many!” With Jonathan’s exclamation, Miss Calculated’s laughter increases in intensity the most of everyone present.

“Wha-hey! Rude!” Miss Chievous turns to look directly at Jonathan, putting her hands on her hips and scowling. The harsh expression doesn’t last very long before she switches to sticking out her tongue and blowing a raspberry at him.

This just earns her a return of the same expression, though Jonathan makes a point of scrunching his face up even more, and also holding the thumb of one hand up to his nose, wiggling his fingers as well while he does it.

‘I can’t even with these two dorks, I love it.’

Somehow, Mikah seems to be the most amused one of all by the duo’s continually evolving crass gesticulation combat.

Mark is currently fanning his face again, trying to recover from all of his recent laughter.

“Goodness, I’m really starting to look forward to having all of you spending more time around here. I’m used to having to go over to Faunahorde to see anything anywhere near this lively.” Mark’s jovial tone is more than apparent as he says this, and it also serves as the trigger to end the little taunting gesture war between Miss Chievous and Jonathan.

Miss Chievous turns to look at Mark, giving him a huge grin.

“Oh, but you’ll probably forget that Mary is even here, once she has a workspace. She’ll be too busy with her new robot boyfriend, heheheh.” Miss Chievous manages to amuse herself greatly with her crack at the end, and even makes a point of elbowing Mary twice, getting a raised eyebrow in return.

“Oh? I’ve known it is sapient for all of, what, two hours? And yet, I’m somehow already in a relationship with it, hmm? Apparently, I move fast.” Miss Calculated tries to have a serious tone while questioning her sister, but she is quite obviously fighting back laughter.

“I am NOT paying for the marital aid attachments! You’re on your own there! And they sure as hell better be well hidden when not in use!” Lucas doesn’t even miss a beat as he fully embraces the joke, causing Miss Chievous to start cackling delightedly while Miss Calculated locks up for a second and then starts turning bright red.

“I-I would never become so depraved as to-! Doubly so when it isn’t even my own robot!” Miss Calculated’s stammered attempts to defend her honor only serve to make Lucas laugh even harder, and Miss Chievous outright snorts.

“Oh, 23! Our love can never be, but you will always be my muse~!” Miss Chievous hams it up with an exaggeratedly dramatic voice, even getting down on one knee and gesturing broadly upwards.

Lucas is starting to have trouble breathing. Apart from Miss Calculated, everyone else’s laughter isn’t all that far behind his.

Josephine has had the most reserved laughter overall, and upon noticing an incoming call she has walked away from the group, stifling laughter as she goes to answer it away from everyone else.

“Wait, wait, by that logic, I should have been dating Willy first! You clearly didn’t look at my notebook!” Miss Calculated’s deflection only adds more fuel to the fire at this point.

Willy even agreeably barks once, consenting to the relationship, earning, somehow, even more laughter.

“You two-timer! How could you betray him like that! And he’s such a good boy!” While shouting this, Miss Chievous has doubled over and started to slap her leg repeatedly, then beginning to laugh heartily once she’s done speaking.

Having fun taking part in the theatrics, Willy gives an exaggerated mournful howl. Next to him, Jonathan has slid down the wall, now crouched down close to the ground, shaking with full-body laughter.

“Wait, wait! How the hell were you the first one outta the three of us to bag a babe!? No Fair! You dog, you!” Lucas’s attempt at sounding stern lasts for all of a few seconds, but, before long, he is doubled over laughing as well.

Willy, of course, gives a loud and proud bark in recognition of his dating prowess.

Miss Calculated, somehow a touch redder now, has shifted her gaze over to stare at Lucas for a few speechless seconds.

Outside, across the street, Dan has just stepped out of Faunahorde, carrying a small object in each hand. Mounted upon her rightful throne, Sylph is happily nestled into place, atop his head.

If one were to look closely enough, they would perhaps notice the slight bulge to her little tummy. It turned out that it was hard work receiving all of that love and affection, and she needed a hearty snack to revitalize.

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Lucas total kills: 7

Lucas total deaths: 11

Lucas total assists: 1

Lucas current GDV: 17.00 (+.01 net change)

Lucas's fame level: 5.0* (Already beginning to receive authentic global attention. His local levels are effectively maxed.)

Lucas's hero suspicion level: 2.5* (More than just passing suspicion for many paranoid individuals, numerous people have realized he's an impulsive idiot.)

Jonathan total kills: 7

Jonathan total deaths: 2

Jonathan current GDV: 5.80

Jonathan's fame level: 2.5* (What fame he does have is predominantly local.)

Jonathan's hero suspicion level: 3.0* (More than just overly-paranoid people are suspicious at this point.)

Willy's fame level: 1.5* (Anonymous meme fame, local fame primarily as 'Xenoclast's dog', but some strangers know him as William/Willy now.)

Supervillain social circle size: 15

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Little character theater:

The three organic members of the Lynn family are all far too busy enjoying the ongoing joke to pay much attention to anything else, let alone the audience.

427, replicating a long and drawn-out sigh: ‘I should have known better than to get my hopes up that they’d manage to convey any useful information. I tried, Miss Calculated, I really did.’

Author, with an impish grin: Yes, Lucas put absolutely no thought into what he said beyond it being the setup for the ‘you dog, you’ joke.

Mr.. Quacks, turned away in a bit of a huff, but still confident he would have been the first one to land a girlfriend if he had chosen to lower his standards to include humans too: Quack.